


Becoming Whole

by HankyPranky



Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU after Dean goes to Hell, Explicit Sexual Content, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Slow Burn, Smut, Tags will be updated with the story, The Trickster - Freeform, apocalypse re-write, set late season 3
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:47:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 37
Words: 48,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27640226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HankyPranky/pseuds/HankyPranky
Summary: After Dean goes to hell, the Trickster steps in and helps Sam deal with the aftermath.Gabriel probably (& reluctantly) helps stop the Apocalypse!
Relationships: Gabriel/Sam Winchester
Comments: 31
Kudos: 109





	1. Ramifications

**Author's Note:**

> Suicide triggers this chapter/introspection.  
> Please heed this warning*  
> Sam's headspace is a very dark place at the moment.

It was another dingy motel with stained carpets and flickering outdoor lights, equipt with broken ice machines. Sam sat cross-legged on the squeaky bed in a place that could have been considered ‘home’ at one point. Laying out the weapons in front of him, the selection to find the right tool began.

Picking up the 8" blade first, it felt good and hefty in his hand. Sam had bled out a few times in his life… The chill that had seeped into his bones while the warm blood pooled around his body, sinking in darkness, made him shiver... He placed the knife back down on the mattress.

He picked up the revolver, trying to remember how many times he had shot this off. This particular gun held no significance to him, just another tool. There were four bullets left, including the one in the chamber. "One of these is not like the other…" Wait, yes, they are. 

Bullets go in, brains come out. This will do fine. The question is; Is he ready to go through with this? His soul is tainted, it’s vicious and brown. If there is a Hell, then there must be a heaven, right? The universe maintains balance. 

If that is true, would he be allowed to enter heaven? The likely answer is that he would be joining Dean in the pit. At least they would be together.

Sam focused on on the weight of the gun in his hand that was keeping him centered.

Just beyond his periphery, there was a knock at the door. He sat still on the bed as the knocking began to get more persistent. The world around him was static. 

He could be dead by now. He could be with Jess. A more straightforward solution would be to get in the Impala and drive off a cliff, but he'd have to get out of bed. Though. Screw that, AND SCREW DEAN.

This is all his fault. Selling his soul, for what? One year?  **Bullshit.** Dean took away his opportunity for peace. He could have died in a somewhat normal way, a hunter's death. If he doesn't kill himself, then what else is left? Feeling his blood pressure rise, he wonders if that will make his brains splatter more when he pulls the trigger.

"Whoa there, kiddo… Slow your roll!" Sam turned his head to see the Trickster dressed in a red polo and khaki pants, balancing two pizza boxes on the palm of his hand, a solemn smirk masked by his mustache. Sam’s eyes narrowed, not entirely surprised to see him there but annoyed at his presence regardless.

Looking down at the gun in his hands, he let out a tumultuous breath. In one swift movement, he swiped the arsenal of weapons off the dingy motel bedspread to the floor. Resigned to the fact that the Trickster was in his room, he turned on his side, laying down the facing the wall. Whatever punishment he was there to deliver, his current existence was worse.

The quick-witted man stood there, slack-jawed. The man that could never shut his trap stood silent. Being dismissed like this would typically ignite his temper, but seeing Sam so fragile upset him. Placing the pizza boxes on the table, he stepped towards the edge of the bed, only hesitating a moment before venturing onto the mattress and angling himself behind Sam.

Sam felt the mattress shift with the added weight until he thought the Trickster’s warm breath on the back of his neck, and he immediately stiffened. Hearing a snap of fingers, Sam shut his eyes in anticipation of being sent to another dimension or another form of torture; Yet, the result was him now wearing comfortable sweatpants and a tee shirt. 

This was not what he was expecting, and he could have sworn the bed was more cushioned and the blanket softer. To add to his disbelief, the Trickster wrapped an arm around his center and pulled him into his chest. 

Sam had two choices, stay rigid or melt into the embrace; both left him at a complete loss. The Trickster was a warm, comforting presence behind him, but he had also tortured him for months. He wished he could drown out the static that was threatening to overtake him again. 

The Tricker adjusted his position murmuring in his ear, "Indulge me.” 

With a wave of the Trickster’s hand, there was a shift in the room. Sam opened his eyes to take in the new sight. They were still in bed, in the same position, but the motel walls vanished, and they were on a hilltop in a forest. Sam knew it wasn't an illusion because he was breathing fresh air, and he dared not move. The large trees were surrounding them, overlooking the lake below in a valley. The water was illuminated by the moon in the night sky, soothing him.

At that realization, he felt more peaceful. He turned to face the man behind him. The Trickster's golden eyes locked onto his, and he saw tenderness that he was feeling.

Finding his breath, he asked, "Why?" 

Instead of an answer, the Trickster pulled him closer to his chest, and the static began to recede. A sob formed in his throat, and knowing he wouldn’t be able to swallow it down, he allowed it to come out. His body wracked with grief until he relinquished that last bit of despair from the loss of Dean…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have over 45K written as fem!Sam that I wrote years ago on FF. It's going to take some time to edit and convert it to M/M which I believe is the correct form. Any encouragement you want to leave me is whole heartily accepted <3  
> I will finish and update this as f/m on FF but I'm not in a big hurry because the only feedback I ever got was "please update"... ;\
> 
> P.S. This was my very first story I ever felt compelled to post. I know it's a little passe after all these years but I hope you enjoy!


	2. Gambling

As the sunlight slipped through the branches of the trees Sam fought the sunrise by not fully opening his swollen eyes. Instead, stretching his long limbs, rolling on the mattress to wake his sore joints. 

The mattress began to dip sharply and Sam braced himself while craking an eye against the light to find the Trickster rocking back on forth on his feet. Once seeing Sam’s eye open, he began jumping, "Guten Morgen, Guten Morgen, Guten Morgen Samanshine!" 

An uncontrollable smile rose on Sam’s lips unable to fight the Trickster’s incessant and annoying behavior. "Did you just smile at me? I like that, do it again." The Trickster laughed and flopped onto the bed, bouncing into Sam. He asked, "What do you want to do today?"

Sam was perplexed but managed to ask, "What do you mean?"

The Trickster spread his arms, "What do you mean? We have a whole planet to play on, we can do anything we want!" He held his chin between his forefingers and said, "Actually, we should get breakfast first." He snapped his fingers and Voila! They standing in line at a buffet.

Sam practically strained his neck looking around. The room they were in was huge full of strangely dressed people. Feeling his attire had changed, he looked down to discover he was wearing a Hawaiian shirt, canvas shorts, and O’God… Was he wearing black socks and white Teva’s? "This isn’t funny!!" He exclaimed.

The Trickster turned around and patted his shoulders, "You look great Samach-alot! We’re in Vegas, I thought we should blend," gesturing to his own figure. He wore a pink Hawaiian shirt, gold spandex pants, and high tops. His neck was accessorized with Elvis glasses that were swinging around his neck. Sam gaped, but after the kindness, he was shown last night, he felt like he owed him at least a conversation... And his stomach was grumbling.

Waiting for the Trickster to convince the server to put more whipped cream on his pancakes took longer than it did for him to fill his plate. The swirl was already 4" high. Apparently, ‘more’ means, ‘Give me the can’. They sat down across from each other and Sam was picking at his eggs, not knowing where to start. Somehow the Trickster managed to say with his pancakes shoved into his mouth, "Start there. With that fruit." He pointed to the bowl of fruit with his fork.

Sam raised one eyebrow, "Can you read my mind?"

The Trickster snorted, "Yea, but you are also projecting your pain pretty loudly kiddo." Sam felt violated but recognized the honesty in his eyes and let him finish. "Listen, I've been keeping tabs on you and you're kinda’ my favorite human of this century." Sam’s eyes were wide considering the last time they met. "Maybe even last couple of centuries… But there are whispers of something on the horizon. With your track record... I'm sure you are going to be involved. The way I see it is that you're mine until you can take care of yourself again."

Sam glowered at the Pagan God, "I'm not yours. My life is mine to do what I want."

The mischievous God slammed his fork into the wooden tabletop, his voice hoarse, "You forfeit your life the second you decided to pull the trigger. I'm not letting you go until I see fit. " His calm demeanor returned, "What can I say? I feel a little bad about our last encounter. Let me set it right."

Sam knew fighting the Trickster was futile, but he wasn't willing to hand his life over to him either. "What exactly are you suggesting, and why should I find this situation agreeable?" Pausing, “Or any situation with you?” 

Loki leaned back and stated, "You can look at this as purgatory if you'd like, but try to think of it as a rebirth. I am here to guide you. You have been manipulated by forces that are far greater than yourself and your brother too." His lips were terse as he continued, "I am not gonna lie to you. I have no reason to. Come with me to my home and take some time off. Eat, drink, swim, whatever."

"That's it? Take a vacation? What about what's coming down the pipeline?" Sam sat there trying to reign in his thoughts. He hasn't had any sort of normalcy since Stanford. He could hit the road by himself, maybe crash with Bobby but he cringed at his limited options.

"Yep," Loki said popping the p. "That's it. It's not a vacation, consider yourself grounded. What's coming our way? Well, if it even does happen, there isn't anything we can do about it, so don't worry about it. You're interesting Sambo." He rested his hands on the back of his head, "Now, let me ask you again, what do you want to do today?"


	3. Traveling

Packing up the rest of his belongings from the motel room, Sam thought he must be delusional, entrusting his wellbeing to the Trickster. He needed to ask him what to call him other than the Trickster. Watching out of the corner of his eye, the sandy blonde-haired man responded with a smirk, "Call me Loki."

Sam snapped, "God! Are you going to keep invading my privacy?"

"God has nothing to do with it. Though I am A God, " he winked at him saucily. "Also, don't you watch Orange Is the New Black? Prisoners don't have privacy." Sam sagged his shoulders. Prisoners don't have rights either. He has never been capable of making good decisions, and his internal musings are often wrong too. Loki shouted at him this time, "Enough of that self-doubt Samshine! Pack up your shit, and let's get out of this hell hole. I gotta let my dog out."

Back in his jeans and flannel, Sam picked up the pace. The last thing to load was guns and knives he had been considering offing himself with. Kneeling on the floor, he placed each and every weapon back in the bag, a reminder of the life he led, the life he wanted to end. 

Once finished, he slung the bag over his broad shoulders, "I'm ready.” 

He and Loki walked out the door together. Sam was at least 8” taller than him but he felt, but he could feel the power emitting from him despite his smaller stature. Other than the fact he was a deity, he knew little about him. Sam couldn't deny his company granted him a measure of security. That alone was unsettling, he surmised he wasn't the vicious type, though.

Dean had been dead for less than six weeks. Living without him had been the worst experience of his life. He had turned to comment, had pulled out two beers instead of one, had been living in silence now… A life without Dean, without his brother, left him shattered.

Losing Dean was more challenging than losing his father. They had been so close he hears Dean in his head commenting, snipping, and it only makes him angrier. Like right now, he’s ‘saying,’ "Oh hell no, that asshole isn't getting into my car!" He ignored it, but getting into the Impala with Loki didn't feel right. Dean drove, and he was the passenger. This was his baby, and he hated the Trickster. If Dean could see him riding shotgun in the Impala, he knew they would have gotten into a shoving match.

If Loki had picked up on any of his musings, he didn't say anything. They got into the Impala and headed west.

It was about a 20-hour drive from where Sam had been staying to where Loki's home was. He hadn't wanted to stray far from Dean's remains, but he knew it was time to move on. Loki had offered to zap them to his home Impala and all, but he needed time to digest his new situation.

The weather was fair, and Loki did make a good companion. He never let the conversation get too deep, and he always surprised Sam with his honesty. He answered many of Sam's questions. "No, I don't sleep. No, I don't need to eat 12lbs of sugar a day to sustain my energy level. I love karaoke, my favorite color is blue…" and so forth. Sam felt that he was trying to let him know him, though they had been avoiding the difficult questions. Sam knew he would give honest answers, which is why he didn't ask them. If Ruby had been traveling with him, Sam was sure her answers would have been excuses. Ruby wasn't fun either. She was, in fact, a demon.

After about 9 hours of driving, Loki suggested they stopped and rested for the evening. The motels in Colorado were no different than any other state. Loki said to Sam, "I don't mind taking a long way around, but we aren't sleeping on machine washed, cum covered sheets tonight. We are going to enjoy a nice stay in a quaint B&B in the mountains." He navigated through the town, and Sam didn't protest.

They pulled into a large manor and checked in. He let Loki check them in. He was still zoned out from driving. He snapped out of it when he heard "one bed.”

"Two beds," he piped up. At that moment, he remembered Loki didn't need to sleep. The woman explained they only had one-bed bedrooms but would be happy to set them up with two bedrooms instead. "One bed is okay,” he heard himself say. One bed? Hmph. The clerk led them to their room. Kindly apologized they had missed dinner, but she would send two sandwiches up for them. Loki was happy to hear this and thanked her.

Sam collapsed on the bed while Loki looked out the window. "I am going to ward our room. We don't want any nasty bed bugs popping in while we sleep."

He froze, "I thought you didn't sleep?"

"Well, I don't need to, but I enjoy it." He must have felt his concern, mentioning, "I can sleep on the couch if you'd feel more comfortable." He looked over to the couch, and it was broken, horribly stained had flies buzzing around it.

Sam exclaimed, "Loki! Are you messing with my perception?"

He swayed from side to side, "Maybe… Does that mean we can't share a bed?"

Groaning as he got to his feet, "Actually, I don't really care either way. Wait, do you snore?" Loki shook his head. "Okay, just stay to your side then. I am gonna’ take a shower."

Looking in the mirror, he pushed his hair out of his face. Sometimes he wished he and Dean shared more similar features, but now he was glad he couldn’t really see his brother’s reflection staring back at him. Leaning closer, he inspected the bags under his eyes before moving to his own eyes. That’s where he saw his brother… The dullness he saw there was all him. Dean’s eyes were sharp, focused. 

There was a knock on the door, "Get in there, big boy!"


	4. Parking

The further Loki and Sam drove into Washington, the more the roads twisted along the coastline. All the homes they passed were beautiful and varied in style and size. Sam was looking forward to getting out of the car a be done driving. As the Impala turned into the driveway, he opened the garage door. "Pull in, but watch the front end, I don't want you hitting my unicycle." Sam rolled his eyes like he would scratch the car, whatever.

It was a three-story home on a bluff. Sam followed Loki through the door in the garage and it led them into the foyer from the mudroom. As they entered his home, he was struck with the view of the Puget Sound from the vast windows. It was dusk, but the sun was still reflecting into the sky, pinks, and purples fusing into the approaching darkness.

In the living room there was a stone fireplace, it extended into the large vaulted ceiling with bookcases on both sides. A grand piano was to the left facing the windows. He was distracted by the little Jack Russel Terrier that was belting Loki's praise. Loki bent over picking him up and let him lick him all over his face. Sam was a dog person but even this was kinda’ gross.

"The bond between a man and his dog is a very precious thing," he said to Sam. "Come over here and meet Vincent."

Sam came beside Loki but was hesitant, "Um, Vincent is just a regular dog right? He wasn't like a person or anything was he?"

Loki laughed, "Of course not! Vincent is very much a regular dog…" He rubbed the pooch’s belly, "You're a good boy, aren't you. Yeah, you don't knick ladies' panties anymore do you." He set Vincent down and Sam reached and scratched behind his ears. Vincent appeared to enjoy his pets if his wagging tail was an indication.

"Make yourself at home, I will give you a tour in a little bit. I have to give this rascal some more attention first.” Loki slid the patio doors open revealing a large deck, “Will you join us outside?" 

Sam rubbed a hand over his face and followed. Glancing around he noticed the doggy door and a patch of grass. Vincent dropped his ball in front of him and Loki instructed him to toss it over the rails onto the shore. Vincent tore after it in a flash leaving Sam to remember how much he loves animals.

Loki walked past, placing a gentle hand on Sam’s shoulder indicating he was going down to the shore. Spying Vincent returning, you made your way down to the sand. The wind was brisk but welcomed, it contrasted the numbness Sam was feeling. The vastness of the water stealing his breath. For so many years he couldn’t appreciate his surroundings.

Lost in his thoughts and the vastness of the water, Loki and Vincent played around him. He didn't know how long they were outside when Loki suggested they eat dinner and they retreated into the house.

  
  


With a snap of his fingers, there was a spread in front of Sam that rivaled the buffet in Vegas. Shaved roast beef in plum sauce, foie gras, and tuna fish. Sam turned his nose up at the foie gras and tuna and Loki made a displeased sound. "Come on! What is wrong with the food?"

"Generally, I stay away from food that isn't harvested in the most... respectable way." He squirmed. Food procurement wasn't something most people wanted to talk about. Especially to a Pagan God with their blood sacrifices and such.

Loki wasn't accepting this and crossed his arms over his chest, "What's wrong with fish?"

The fish wasn't the problem, it is the fisherman that caught dolphins and sharks in their net. "Ahhh, I see where you are coming from Sammy boy" Loki leaned back against the countertop and his face lit up with glee. "I can put a shark in the big CEO's pool when he isn't looking? Or I can turn him into a dolphin and set him free into the ocean! Better yet put him at Sea World to perform for others! Your wish is my command." He smiled wickedly at Sam, his eyes gleaming with mirth.

"No!" He shook his head. "Poetic justice is not what I want. Do we need to talk about this now? It's been a long day."

Loki nodded his head, "Yea, Sammy, we do. This is what I do and if we are going to be together for a while, I am going to go about my business as I see fit. If it is any consolation, I usually don't kill anyone."

"Except my brother, over a hundred times," Sam glared at him.

His mood changed instantly, and he growled at Sam. "Your brother was going to die either way and if you weren't so thick you would have learned that lesson I tried to impart on you. You can't even comprehend the dark path you were headed for if you didn't pull the trigger!" He stepped closer to Sam, lowering his tone and regaining his composure, "I just want to help you put yourself together a bit. Like Humpty Dumpty." The last bit was said with compassion and it jarred Sam. Loki ran his fingers through his hair and huffed out a breath.

"Ok," Sam agreed.

"Great! Now, let's see about getting food in your stomach. How does mac and cheese sound?" Sam pursed his lips together and frowned.

Loki’s voice cracked in exasperation, "Really! What now?"

"I'm lactose intolerant."

"Oh, is that all?" Loki snapped his fingers, "Not anymore! You are fully capable of metabolizing the enzymes on your own now.”

Sam's face lit up, "Wait, can we have linguine in alfredo sauce?"

"Anything you want kiddo." All the food that had appeared on the table was gone and Loki went about starting a pot of boiling water. "Let's do the tour while dinner gets going."

Loki led Sam through the dining room with Vincent trailing behind them, his little nails clicking on the hardwood floors. The second floor was a large lounge area with pinball machines, couches, and a TV. There were also two bedrooms on that floor. The third floor was Loki's domain.

Sam didn't own much, more weapons than he did clothes these days, and even fewer books than he'd like. Bobby had more of his stuff since that had become home base for him and Dean. He didn't have the courage to call Bobby yet, but he would need to soon. He made a mental note to email him and tell him he was OK.

The bedroom Loki set up was fairly simple. Queen mattress on a simple wood frame, end tables, and a bookcase. There was a door that leads to the en suite, and another to the closet. He was surprised when he opened up the closet that it a whole wardrobe. Turning back to Loki, he just smiled at him, “I thought you would like to have options.”

He walked in and ran his calloused fingers along the hangers. Most of it was basic articles of clothing, but it evolved the further he moved into the space. There were flashy suits and leather pants, then silky nightys. He pulled a garment out, it was a fushia pink nighty with fur along the top and bottom. He held it out in front of himself, "Is this what you're into?"

Loki's smirk was enough to make him blush, "You would look cute in pink." He felt his ears burn. He never wore pink, let alone something that scandalous in front of a man before. He preferred the soft curves and curls of a woman, but when he looked at Loki he thought how soft he looked.

Sam was so embarrassed knowing Loki had heard his musings. He wanted to slam the closet door but he didn’t, he held the Trickster’s stare. Loki laughed, gesturing to his form, winking at him, "I am soft and  _ firm _ in all the right places." Sam was grateful for his comedic relief. "Meet me downstairs in 20 minutes. Dinner should be ready."

That should be enough time for a quick shower, Sam turned on the hot water and felt some of the stiffness of his muscles abate. Feeling better he pulled out the pajamas he had been sleeping in, taking a sniff he chucked them on the ground. Perusing the closet, he found the sleeping garments. There were comfortable looking sweatpants and sweatshirts and he pulled a navy hoodie out. It had a note on it, “This is drab.” Putting it back, he retrieved a grey hoodie with another note, “Sooooo drabbbb.” 

He let out a chuckle and put it back. This time he pulled a pair of sweatpants out, another note; “Ugh, if you insist...”

Sam kept looking through the clothes until he saw a matching set of rubber duck pajamas, button-down top and all. Smiling he said, “Fuck it.” Donning the ridiculously soft and warm pajamas, he went downstairs to find Loki.


	5. Settling

They enjoyed their meal in relative silence at the kitchen island with the exception of the little moans Sam made when he took a bite. "Do you know how much better this tastes knowing I’m not going to get sick from the dairy? Thank you, by the way, I really appreciate it." Taking another bite, he continued talking with some food in his mouth, "And for cooking too. Why did you cook anyway?"

Loki just hummed happily, "It's a good way to pass the time.” He just couldn't resist, “Though, had I known you were showering I would have joined you," he said flirtatiously. 

Sam choked but managed to swallow the rest of his food. He supposed Loki would inevitably catch off guard with frequency. "Um, I- glad you didn't know then..."

Loki grinned and leaned forward, "Suppose I've held off flirting as long as I could. The door is open now. #Sorry Not Sorry." He made a hashtag sign with his fingers and held it over his heart.

One of Sam’s dimples appeared as he laughed, "Fair enough. Thanks for the warning." Then he yawned and Loki began cleaning off the table.

"Dessert before bed or in bed?" He quipped.

Sam ducked his head, "Do you have any hot cocoa?"

"Sure thing." He came back with two mugs and retired to the living room. Sam blinked rapidly at his cup wondering if there any cocoa in this or if he was handed a cup of whipped cream. After slurping some of the whipped cream, he curled into the chair holding his warm drink with both hands with Vincent snoozing away at his feet.

Angling his head towards the piano he asked, "Do you play?"

"At times. I don't spend much time at this home. I have been placating myself in others ways..." He responded with a far off look.

"Like cooking?"

"Exactly. Like cooking. Do you play any instruments?"

Pushing the wisps of hair off his cheek and forehead, "I've been on the road for most of my life, but I suppose I could be considered gifted. I have always loved the piano and the accordion." He hesitated and Loki urged him to continue. Sam cleared his throat, "I used to love to play and sing, but one of the most important rules was, ‘Don't stand out'."

When he glanced at Loki, he was licking the whipped cream off the top of his lip. His eyes were so expressive and warm. He was confident when he said, "You will for me. One day."

A dull throb formed between his legs at the proclamation. He focused on the fireplace for the remainder of his drink and then excused himself to his room.

The days came and went with relative ease and they had established a routine of sorts. Sam would wake at dawn and head downstairs to the kitchen. Loki always had breakfast waiting along with a book. He also brought out a variety of tea for him to try until Sam found one he preferred. In the trials, Loki zapped up some ridiculous hats on them as they had their tea parties.

Generally, the books he chose for his were classic literature, but every so often a steamy romance novel was tossed in for good measure. Then they would often take Vincent down to the beach and go for a walk. Today they planned to take the ferry to the city to do grocery shopping at Pike's Market. Every trip concluded at the cheese deli which always pleased Loki.

Going to the market had become one of his favorite activities with the Trickster. The first time he took him his olfactory sense was overwhelmed. From the crisp, salty breeze, to the freshly baked bread and sweet flowers in the air, he loved it. The market could be pretty busy in the mornings but Loki never let him out of sight, it would be hard since his hand was often in his.

* * *

During the day, he read the books Loki chose for him in the lounge room. At first, he didn't want him picking his reading material but he did make good selections, plus it was one less thing he had to think about. Sometimes he would join him, but most times he would pop off doing "errands".

Loki didn't often tell him what he was doing in the afternoons, except when he felt his 'punishment' was exceptionally creative. He thought it might have been his way of impressing him. As much as he didn't turn a blind eye to his activities, he began to accept this side of him because his heart was in the right place.

One time he came back dressed as a safari man and regaled him with his story of how he arranged the death of a long-time poacher of endangered species. He thought being trampled by elephants was hilarious and a fitting way to meet his end!

If he had the power, could he stand by idly and watch rhinos and elephants have their horns and tusks removed by chainsaws? Biting his lip, he knew with certainty that he would not take enjoyment in the loss of life.

Loki would still play what you  _ could _ consider pranks on people too. Like the little boy that had a nasty habit of putting his gum in the hair of girls at his school. For weeks he ensured that every morning that boy would have a wad of bubblegum in his hair so he would have to cut it out until he had no more hair left. Loki assured Sam that he was no longer torturing his classmates.

Their evenings were spent discussing the book of the day while he prepared dinner. No matter how far along in the story he was, he wanted to discuss the characters and writing style. He particularly enjoyed discussing the steamier novels.


	6. Overcoming

It had been three months since he found himself in Loki's care. He was recovering slowly, the pain lessened each day but it was always present. It was early morning and he was having tea in the living room watching the sunrise through the fog. It was a particularly frigid day, so he was resigned to staying indoors. Sam had been contemplating playing the piano. He heard Loki's voice in his head, _ ‘just do it, you know you want to’ _ . He laughed, even as a figment of his own imagination he was freakin' bossy.

Thus, he found behind on the bench with his feet firmly planted on the ground. He lifted the fallboard, and his hands naturally fell in place to play Moonlight Sonata. His fingers felt tight, he shook his hands fiercely and replaced them back in position. He drew in a deep breath and allowed the lovely notes to flow from the piano.

He made a few mistakes, yet he knew this piece backward and forward. He played it until he got it right from start to finish and smiled at himself, he missed this. He longed for this. He didn't know how he restrained himself as long as he did. The next song he played was The Piano Man by Billy Joel. Overplayed, but it always went over well at college and he hummed the lyrics. He followed it up with The Piano Has Been Drinking by Tom Waits. Singing the lyrics to this tune was the most fun. Though he had to stop and correct himself often, he wasn’t upset; he was enjoying himself.

His thoughts strayed to Loki and how he said he would play for him. Better yet, he remembered  _ how _ he said it. … That conceited man.

Sam liked him, he was cute, and it was uncomplicated. He knew they couldn't keep hovering as they have been forever. Reality  _ will _ reinstate itself. Sam felt a tightness rise in his chest and his stomach bottomed out. He didn't want to think about leaving his bubble. Panic was rapidly overtaking him, blinded by the instinct to run. Fast and far. He stood up so quickly, the bench fell behind him as he bounded forward, gaining momentum, only to have struck something hard that sent him flying. He landed on his backside and grunted in pain. Sam looked up to see the object he had hit, it was Loki. He stared down at him with a worried expression. He focused on his pain and the dread trickled away. "Wha’, what are you doing here?"

"My Sam Distress-O-Meter went off, that's what." He crouched down, "Tell me, what's going on?"

Sam held his gaze and took in deep breaths. "I was just thinking, and… and I was overcome by... fear for no reason… I needed to go."

He was now sitting on the floor with his. "No reason? Come on Sammy, we aren't playing mad libs here. Tell me the whole story." He whistled and Vincent trotted over and found a spot between Sam's legs.

Sam studied the fur on the top of Vincent’s head as he pet him, "I was thinking about the outside world. Like how I don't have a place in it. I guess I don't want to have to go back out, alone." He held back the tears that were threatening to spill over.

Loki situated himself next to his and put his arm around his shoulder. "Kiddo, I know we have been tip-toeing through the tulips, but you do have a place. This is the ‘real world’ as you call it, and your supernatural world. We live in a universe with countless wonders, Including Moi-” circling his own face. “-Natural balance exists." Loki pulled back a little so he could look at him. 

"You can choose one or you can choose both, but you have a choice. Literally, Free Will." He paused, "Let me make one thing clear, you have the choice to make this your home too." He kissed the side of his head. "It's almost Christmas, how about we go see your friend Bobby. Bring him some holiday cheer?"

Sam kissed him on his cheek, "Thank you. You're amazing." Their faces were inches apart, his eyes roamed over his face. Then he poked him in the ribs, "Are you aware you are covered in glitter?"

He sighed and tried to sound despondent, "Yes, and I should have told you before, I have a highly contagious infection." Sam raised his eyebrow and waited for the other shoe to drop. "I have glitterlaudemia!" Loki shot his hands out and glitter rained down on them. "Now you have it too! Come with me to the parade I was at and we can hemorrhage glitter on unsuspecting citizens!"

Gah! he wiped his forehead with the back of his hand, glitter. The floors, walls, Vincent, glitter!

"Ok Mister, but you better make sure I get all this glitter out of my hair."

"Nah, I like it." He put both hands in his hair and massaged his scalp. He scrunched up his face as he pulled a few strands towards his face and his hair was COATED in glitter.

Sam punched him in the arm, "What should I wear?"

Loki pulled him to his feet, and he was now in short tight cerulean blue shorts, bare-chested with the exception of some feathery shoulder garment he couldn’t see. Touching the top of his head, he blindly felt the large crown he was wearing.

"Wowza, you're my kinda' siren. Don't let me drown Samanshine." He grabbed his hand and they were gone in a flash.


	7. Beginning

_ Bobby, _

_ Been thinking about you lately. My friend thinks it's a good idea for us to spend Christmas together and you should get to know him. We will be there on the 23rd unless you say otherwise. Don't do anything you wouldn't if we weren't coming. _

_ Looking forward to seeing you, _

_ Sam _

Driving from Washington to South Dakota takes two days. Loki refused to drive through the rugged terrain in sleet and snow in the Impala, so he materialized a Land Rover instead. It was more luxurious than what he was accustomed to, but he didn't protest. They planned a short detour in Yellowstone national park and left on the 16th.

Wyoming was a beautiful state, but this time of year it could be treacherous. Loki was behind the wheel for much of the drive, which was fine by him as he had plenty of legroom on the passenger side. He was thoroughly enjoying being back on the road and seeing more of the countryside. Vincent, their lovely companion snoozed away in the backseat.

Sam was grateful Loki suggested the trip to see Bobby. He needed their relationship to be OK. They had argued a lot about Dean's remains, and the strain between them was more pronounced after he left. Right now, the first big hurdle was sitting to his left and humming a merry tune.

"On average Yellowstone has 1,000-3,000 earthquakes a year. Tell me Sambone, what do you think of the Super Volcano?"

Clever man, he knew he needed to clear his mind, keep him steady. They conversed the rest of the way about types of magma chambers and the impact volcanoes had on the environment.

It was after dark when they arrived at the log cabin. Loki went in first and flicked a few switches on. It was quaint and smelled like cedar. Sam looked around and it was everything he thought it would be. "Let me heat this place up for us." Loki snapped his fingers and the temperature climbed. The fireplace roared to life and cast a warm glow around the cabin. Most of which was made of hardwood.

"Loki! This place is charming!" He looked around and nodded his head. Vincent scampered about, sniffing everything. He was such a good dog. They took a few moments to explore.

Loki went to the car to retrieve their bags. When he returned he exclaimed, "Boy is it cold out there!" He deposited their bags in their room. "I don't know about you, but I want to snuggle by the fire. Cocoa and a book?"

Sam wasn't a born snuggler but had grown fond of his companion’s constant need for physical affection. He hadn’t been hugged or held this much in his life, and it made him nervous how much he relished it.

"Please. I am going to get changed." He ran back out in his PJs, "We have a sauna in the bathroom and I saw a hot tub outside too! Tomorrow we should make snow angels and jump in the hot tub."

"Sure! I would never turn down the opportunity to see you in a swimsuit!" His lips puckered a bit, "We should go snowmobiling first though, and work up a sweat."

Sam rolled his eyes. "That's cool. Hey, do you want to set up on the floor or couch tonight?" Sam replied.

"Couch." Loki handed both of the mugs. He rearranged the furniture slightly so that the end table was in front of the couch. He took their mugs and took his place on the couch. His back rested against the arm, one-legged on the couch, and the other on the floor. Sam placed the mugs down and laid his back against Loki’s chest. Once he was comfortable, he snaked his leg around his and handed Loki his cocoa.

Loki’s breath was warm on Sam’s ear, "Shall we continue the Hunchback?

He sipped from his cocoa. "No, Esmeralda is aggravating me right now. Can we read something lighter?"

"Hmmm. Ok. How about Treasure Island?"

"Yea." He ran his hand on top of his head smoothing out his hair and laid his cheek on his head and began to read.

"SQUIRE TRELAWNEY, Dr. Livesey, and the rest of these gentlemen having asked me to write down the whole particulars about Treasure Island, from the beginning to the end, keeping nothing back but the bearings of the island..."

Within no time he was asleep. Loki took a peek into his mind to see where his sleep cycle was. Sam wasn’t in REM yet, but he didn’t want to wake him. Snapping his fingers, he tucked Sam into the bed in the other room.

Retreating to the living room, he stared pensively into the fire with a brandy in hand.


	8. Musing - Loki's POV

He inhaled the scent of the brandy from the glass in his hand, the subtle hints of citrus pleased him. He swept the liquor off his lips with his tongue and could taste the barrel it was aged in. He could go down the rabbit hole, see and feel the entire life of the barrel, trace it back to its time as a tree if he wanted to. 

Instead, he focused on the flames while considering the path he was taking with Sam. Associating with a Winchester was risky any day of the week, especially given his status. Originally, his intention was to save his ass from committing suicide, give him a place to regroup, then send him on his way. He had been content with his life, looking back now, all that time seemed hollow. How could the millenniums of existence be void of value? He used to have a purpose...

His thoughts strayed back to Sam sleeping in bed. That Lil' buttercup of muscle and emo-ness made his heart melt. Was he capable of letting him go? It was unnatural how he ached for him. He dismissed the possibility his attraction could be due to a potential mating bond as they were practically unheard of. He was so far removed from what he had once been, no longer an angel of the Lord, it shouldn't even be mentioned.

Would he formally be known as the Pagan God Loki if he remained with Sam? All he wanted was to tuck them into a pocket universe for the rest of time. He worried he could corrupt Sam, or that Sam would resent him overtime for something.

Sam brought him joy. He felt more whole with him in his life, and he would never, ever, let Sam resent him. He'd rather let him go than have that as a possibility. 

Again, he felt the pull again, that niggling sensation... There were a few stories of angels bonding but he had always dismissed them as ludicrous. He could see an impenetrable bond for some, but angels? They were asexual, well mostly. What was less common than bonding was giving up your Grace to become human and spend the rest of their life with as a human. Though rare, his Father had delivered his blessing. He loved his creations beyond measure. 

Yes, he had participated in carnal pleasure, but never saw much of an appeal for it. Then, an image of Sam in parade attire crept into his head. Full of power and unaware of the raw sensuality he held. His touches had only been friendly and reassuring, but that day he wanted to bow down before him and beg entrance to the beauty before him. He was hard at the thought of him naked and thriving beneath him.

Now that- is an indicator! He had only experienced curiosity, not intention. Was Sam still human? Could his residual powers be the cause of his attention? If he wasn't then that would influence a multitude of things. His life span may be increased; However, the danger would be quadrupled. It would also mean there was the potential his grace could merge with his soul which would result in the first-ever angel/human bond. 

He could hear him so clearly. Clairvoyance and telepathy weren't traits of the normal human. He knew would have to broach that topic soon. Those were his abilities and it was his right to have the option of embracing and strengthening them.

Oh, his soul shined so brightly, almost blinding. He figured most ethereal creatures would recognize the purity of his essence but he did not want anything or anyone to see that. Sam was _his_ , and _his_ to protect.  
With the murmurings of an apocalypse, he would need to be vigorous. It was at that moment he realized he would suffer.

For his love, for his life, he would suffer, leaving their only option to be victory. 


	9. Snow Angels

Loki woke up the next morning with Sam's arms splayed over his chest. He slowly disentangled himself and watched him sleep. He looks peaceful. His hair was a mess and had a little drool on the corner of his mouth.

Of course, he had breakfast prepared for them when he came out of the bedroom. They planned out the trails they wanted to take on the snowmobiles and headed out into the wonder of the Midwest.

The mountains that had sculpted the rivers and valleys, towered above them as they zoomed through the terrain. The freedom Sam felt with Loki was unbelievable. It was dangerous this time of year, but he had no fear as long as he was beside him, or any time for that matter.

Having been exhausted from their adventure and frozen by the temperature, they returned to their cabin around 3 PM. They had lunch and played gin rummy while winding down if you could call it that. They were both highly competitive and they played best 3 out of 5. Both gained and lost points, but in the end, Loki won.

It was dusk when Sam emerged from the bedroom in swim trunks with towels in his arms. "Hot tub time?"

Loki retorted, "Sure! Clothing optional right?"

"Ha. Ha. No. Wear swim trunks."

"Wearing anything in a hot tub is so faux pas. When was the last time you went skinny dipping? Let loose, slip the collar Sammy!"

He gave it some thought, he wasn't ashamed of his body, he just wasn't in the practice of being nude in front of anyone other than a lover. He was trying to be more open to life. "Okay," he said.

"Wow, I didn't expect you to say yes."

"Should I have said no?"

"No, I'm proud of you. Hot tubs and pools are so much better naked! You'll love it."

They headed to the door and he stopped. He untied the knot around his waist and let his trunks fall to the floor, he kicked them out of the way. He could see their reflection in the door. He saw Loki take his shirt off and then looked away when he took his bottoms off. They smiled at one another as they opened up the sliding doors and were hit with the frigid air. Sam yelped and Loki shouted "Get in!

He ran towards the tub and when he entered he felt his skin burn against the hot water. He had goosebumps and he was shivering in the water. The cold air was as harsh as the hot water. Loki splashed in next to him, exclaiming "Holy shit snacks!”

"So cold. Feels so good though," Sam chattered through his teeth. It didn't take too long to acclimate to the water and to the air. "You're right, this is way better."

He laughed heartily, "Told you so."

"I still kinda’ want to jump in the snow. It's so cold though. What do you think? Will I die?"

"Nah, you'll be fine. Plus I'd revive you."

"Oh you will, will you? Mouth to mouth?" Sam couldn't believe that came out of his mouth. However, he didn't blush or backpedal.

"Is that a challenge or are you hitting on me?" He paused and gave him a sassy look, lip curled. "Why Samuel, you already got me naked in a hot tub, what more do you want?"

"Ha! You're the reason I'm naked," he responded. He hadn't felt this playful in so long. He didn't know how much of the flirting he meant, but he was having fun and was going to enjoy it.

Loki rested his arms against the back of the tub rails, "I'd consider it a win."

"You hate to lose."

"So do you, it's why we make such a good team."

"We do, don't we…" he agreed. "I can only imagine what we would be like on a case together. I don't know if anyone would take us seriously."

The mood shifted, "Do you want to hunt again?" Loki asked.

"Well... it's hard to know there are innocent people out there being affected by things they can't control or fight."

"I understand more than you know kiddo." He breathed out. He waited for him to continue and was disappointed when he didn't. He switched his hands in the water, "It's one of the reasons I do what I do. I aim for some form of justice for the wicked."

"I know you do. I may not approve of all your ways, but I understand." Sam tapped him on the shoulder, "Turn around." He did and he began massaging his shoulders. He purred beneath the ministrations. His skin was soft and cold to the touch. He felt a few knots and worked them out with his thumbs. He pushed him below the water level so they could both submerge their shoulders in the water. 

Sam continued working down his backbone with both hands and he melted into him. He had to keep him upright with his leg. When their skin touched, it was electric. Loki took his leg in his hand, rubbing his calf in return. He enjoyed his touch, but it had never been as intimate as this. He proceeded to work his way down his spine and stopped when he got to the base of his spine, he then placed his hands on his hips and applied a bit of pressure, and Loki let out a long moan.

To have control over this man gave him a power he didn't know he yearned for. He felt a twinge between his legs but ignored the feeling. Sam placed a gentle kiss on his shoulder, “Better?” 

He reached down and stroked both Sam’s legs. "If I had known I was in for such a treat, this would have been the first thing we did." He turned to see him smiling at him. "Your turn." Sam was trembling. "Nevermind, let's get you inside. We will save the snow angels for another time."

He got out of the hot tub first and ran towards the door forgetting his towel. Loki was on Sam’s heels and brought them with him. Sam was standing there completely exposed holding himself for warmth. Being inside was a big improvement, but not nearly enough. He tossed the towels aside and approached him, wrapping him in his arms Their bodies mingling, giving some relief to his trembling form. "Let's get in the shower, it will be nice and hot,” Loki suggested.

They scurried into the bathroom. The shower was big but only had one shower head. He placed him under the steady stream of hot water first. He stood there as the water poured over his head and down his body. Sam looked down at Loki, beads of water pouring down his face and stepped aside for him to get under the spray.

Even in close quarters, neither of them peaked below the waist. Sam’s mind was open to him most times, so he tried to put shields in place to divert his thoughts when they strayed to his handsomeness.

He was attractive and built better than he had thought he would be. He was muscular, and always had a slight tan. He couldn't help but admire him. Sam stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel, when the water shut off, Sam handed the other towel to his Trickster.

Wrapping themselves up, they went to change before meeting in front of the fire in the living room. Loki brought hot cocoa as usual and they sat by the fire wrapped in blankets. He was running his fingers through his wet hair with little success getting the knots out. Loki interrupted him, "Let me." 

Sam turned around and Loki began brushing his hair from the bottom up just the way he did it. He asked, "What do you think we should get Bobby as a Christmas gift?"

Sam's response was a giggle that sounded completely bizarre falling from his lips. Yet, it was the giddiness of the domesticity that caused it. Loki paused, "What? It's customary to bring a gift."

His hair was thoroughly brushed at this point, but he adored how he doted on him. "Hmmm… well he loves rare books. He is also a mechanic. I think I may need to think about it for a while."

"I don't know him at all but we could get a mug that says 'World's Greatest Hunter’ on it."

Sam laughed and faced him once again, "That's cute. It could have across as a handle with a rosary print wrapped around it."

Poof. There it was in Loki's hand. "What do you think doll?"

"That's fantastic!" He exclaimed.

Next to materialize was a book. "This is a copy of one of mine. It's a collection of ancient gods and lore." He handed it to him and he turned it over in his hands. The cover was well battered and the lettering on the cover had been hand carved. It was written in Latin, Bobby would have no problem interpreting it. He leafed through a couple of pages, stopping on the lore of Krampus.

"We met Pagan Gods on our last holiday," he said. "They called themselves The Carrigan's."

Loki was clearly surprised by this. "Oh yeah? How'd it turn out for them?"

"Well, as good as you can expect. They're dead." Sam closed his eyes and replayed the memory for Loki. His temper was crescendoing as he recalled how they were tied to chairs and they cut Dean, taking his blood. The blinding pain he experienced as that dick ripped his fingernail off.

Loki shook his head and cringed. "Whoa kiddo. I always knew you two were a force to be reckoned with but that was rough. You took down Madge and Eddie."

Sam eyed him suspiciously, "On a first name basis, were you?"

"Oh, hush. I've been kickin' it for a long time and bumped into them a few times. Nasty creatures. Good riddance." 

Loki reached to stroke his hair, but Sam stopped him and snapped back, "Why didn't you do anything? They killed countless people."

"It was none of my business," he said firmly.

His green eyes met Loki’s unbelievably hazel ones, his cheeks flushed with anger. He raised his voice, "None of your business? To stop assholes like that from slaughtering folk year after year!"

His voice rose to match Sam’s, "Yes! As in. Did not involve me. I wasn't going to tango with those two! I can't go around killing Pagans! Otherwise, I would be dead! D.E.A.D.," he spelled out.

Sam glared hard at him and bit his lips. He thought about the merit of his words. He had always known him to be selfish, but he  _ did _ trust him. Yet, what if he tossed him to the wolves, make a trade for his life. He began to panic and started to feel so small in the presence of this deity.

Gabriel shifted and sat across from Sam and took his larger hands in his, "Look, that was before." He dramatically exhaled, "You're going to get 60 seconds of sap and then a spanking. So here goes, you have wheedled your way into my heart and stoked the flame a bit. Perhaps resurrected a few degrees of morality too. I am not the same person I was when I met you. Whether that's a positive or negative change for me, I honestly don't care." Sam’s expression softened as he touched his cheek. "I have you now. If we encountered them tomorrow, I'd be beside you, juggling sharp objects for you to choose from."

_ Ding! _ Sam turned his head in the direction of the sound and saw a kitchen timer for Loki’s rant, he burst out laughing. Loki had a smug expression and he wiggled his eyebrows at him.

Then his pupils constricted and the gold flecks in his eyes radiated authority. "Now, you listen and you listen closely. I would  _ never _ trade your life for anything. Shame on you! I can virtually handle  _ any _ situation. I have accepted the fact that consorting with a Winchester puts both our lives in jeopardy, and I  _ will _ defend the pair of us."

Sam was slightly turned on at the ferocity of his words. Stunned as well. "I trust you."

"Without a doubt?"

"Yes," he stammered out. His Pagan God pulled him forward into a crushing kiss. He dominated his mouth, and Sam hungrily reciprocated. Their hands were grasping at each other. He finally let him go, their eyes never straying from each other.

"Outstanding!" He was beaming, and his smile was contagious. Both of their smiles were so great their dimples appeared. They giggled into themselves. "One more thing…"

"It's always one more thing with you."

"Don't you know it," he bopped him on the nose. "You love it."

"Yep." He said popping the p. Sam added, "For the most part."

"I'd like to court you after Christmas." Sam was studying his face, he didn't answer him fast enough to his liking. "Sam?"

"Isn't that a bit antiquated?" he asked, trying not to sound insulting.

"Boy, you sure know how to make a man feel comfortable."

Sam traced his jawline, "Tell me what you have in mind."

He squirmed a bit, "First, I'd like to take the time to show you my affections, write you letters, serenade you..." His hand fell to his knee and he cleared his throat, "Is it hot in here?" He began to fan himself with his shirt.

Sam’s voice was soft, prodding, "Loki, look at me." He did and he could see the nervousness written on his face. Normally, his mask was perfectly in place, at least in public. In private, he had begun to be more and more unguarded in his presence, as he did in his. "You don't need to do that. You are so sweet to me. You do so much for me now as it is."

He looked at him a little annoyed, "It's more than that. It's about winning your heart. Learning who you are on every level and connecting to one another. Would you let me do that?"

Sam was taken aback at his declaration. He understood they both needed to take their relationship slowly. A smile returned to his face, "Yes. Will you grant me the same measure?"

He smiled back at him, "Yes, it would be an honor."


	10. Christmas Vacation Part I

As he pulled into Bobby's driveway, Loki put his hand on Sam’s leg. "It's gonna be fine. You know after he tries to kill me."

Sam smiled wearily at him, "I sure hope so." They got out of the Land Rover with Vincent in tow and walked up to the front door. He slowly raised his hand to knock, but then lowered it. It was Loki that knocked, but he took a quick step back and ducked behind Sam.

Bobby opened the door and his eyes lit up when he saw him. He looked as he always did, gruff with a black baseball cap. Then Bobby's eyes spied Loki behind his ‘son’.

"You!" He pulled a knife from his pocket and lunged to attack.

"No, no no! Bobby, it's fine! He is my friend." Sam pushed Bobby back.

"Boy, you must be under some sort of spell if you think this Trickster is your friend."

"Let us in and I can explain," he said forcefully.

Bobby looked at Sam and drew back. Loki fixed his collar on his jacket, "Man, it's always stab first, ask questions later with you hunters."

Bobby stared at him and back at Sam when Vincent barked. "Bobby, this is Vincent and you have met Loki before, as the Trickster." Loki waved back in a carefree manner.

"Sam, you better have one hella' story for this." He opened the door and let them both inside, but was the last to go in. He walked slowly behind them watching Loki like a hawk.

Sam picked up an empty bottle, "Bobby, what's up with the liquor store?" 

"Like you're one to talk, what's up with  _ you  _ and your Trickster?"

Loki was looking around and Vincent was sniffing here and there. Sam led the three of them to the library and took their seats. Bobby pulled out a shotgun and displayed it across his legs. Vincent then jumped up on Sam, plopping down in his lap. His ears were perked, but nestled in comfortably.

Soothing himself and the dog, he pet Vincent. However, it was Loki to speak first. "I know we didn't get off on the right foot last the first time we met. My intentions towards Sam are honest and I have every desire to see him happy."

Bobby's voice was harsh, "And what intentions are those?"

Loki pressed his fingers together like a scout, "To make sure he stays alive and kicking." He paused, "To make sure he has the life  _ he _ chooses and ensuring he has a place to come home to."

"Why do you care? You're one of the most self-absorbed  _ people _ I have ever met. If you could call yourself a person. You wreaked havoc on their lives!"

"No more than they did," he quipped back. Loki then jumped up and Bobby's shotgun was in his hands faster than a pickpocketer at the Louvre. "Have you met him!" He pointed at Sam, "He is radiant and worth fighting for!" He moved behind him and rested his hands on the back of Sam’s chair. "Aren't cha' Samster?"

His comments broke him out of his self-loathing and Sam smiled coyly. Bobby gawked on slack-jawed. Obviously, Sam was at ease with him, so he lowered his gun begrudgingly. He turned his attention to the man he thought of like a son.

Sam exhaled, "You remember how bad it was. I'm dealing, and it's only because of Loki that I am able to… Deal." he took a side glance at him, "He saved my life and I trust him." He thought to himself, he's kinda’ my boyfriend too.

Bobby rocked in his seat, staring at Loki burning a hold in his head, “That's fine for now, but one toe out of line and I  _ will  _ end you."

Loki smirked, "It's what you do after you cross the line that counts."

"Loki!" Sam cried out in a hushed tone.

Bobby rolled his eyes, "I hope you know what you're doin' Sam."

He laughed, "He grows on you."

They ordered Chinese for dinner and caught up with each other over a bottle of scotch. Bobby was pleased to hear what he had been doing, but Bobby’s life was shittier than before. He was behind in the shop and was having a hard time answering all the phone lines for the hunters. Sam was more than happy to help while he was visiting and asked for a list of the cars Bobby needed work done on.

Tonight, not only did they polish off the bottle of Johnny Walker, but they finished a bottle of Jameson too. Loki carried them both to bed.

The sun came through the lace window curtains, Sam flopped into Loki. "Uggghhhh."

"Hungover babe?" He wrapped an arm around his waist. "Ugh is right, you have dumpster breath," he abruptly turned away from him and tapped his on the chest. "There, your master forgives you."

Both his nausea and headache vanished. "You're a miracle worker, you." He swished his tongue around in his mouth, "Is that mint I taste?" He chuckled and kissed him. 

"What can I say? I want my  _ boyfriend  _ feeling fresh."

He teased back, "Oh, you heard that did you?" Snuggling into his side.

"I don't think it's the most accurate word, given that I am practically ancient. I can't introduce you as my mate though…" He ran his fingers up and down his arms, "Suitor? Companion? Mmmm, you're so soft…. Sorry, how about Beau?"

He nestled closer into him, "Yeah, I like that. You're my beau, and I'll be yours."

He tickled him, "You'll be whatever I want!" he shrieked. "My sugar plum, my sweetheart, my…" He lifted his shirt and gave his a raspberry, "My Samanberry!"

Sam threw him off him in a fit. "Whatever you want! Just stop!" he husked out.

He kissed his belly and pulled down his shirt. "Fine. Breakfast?"

Finally catching his breath he surveyed Loki clad in his boxers, a thin blanket covering them both. Admiring him, he was so handsome and he felt so  _ much _ around him... He didn't know how he got so lucky.

"You won the lottery sweet tits." His eyes flared with mirth. He laughed and threw the blankets off both of them.

"You have no idea how sweet my tits are. You owe me orange juice for that comment though."

"Your wish is my command," he replied.


	11. Christmas Vacation Part II

It was mid-morning when Sam and Loki finished breakfast. Sam excused himself to the yard, and Loki was going to peruse the library when Bobby stumbled into the kitchen.

"Coffee, old man?" Loki asked.

"Watch your tongue." He ran a hand through his hair and tightened the belt on his robe.

"I'll take that as a yes. Cream and sugar?"

"Just give it here. Where is Sam?"

Loki poured the coffee and handed it to the old bastard, "He's working on the Buick. I have everything for omelets. Anything you want in yours?"

Bobby drank from his mug, "Extra sausage?"

"No problem." Loki beat the eggs and prepared the dish. "So, how long have you known Sam? He didn't say."

Bobby was still groggy but answered, "I met his daddy when they were kids. Back then, hunters were a tight-knit crew, and I was just starting out."

Loki was putting the veggies in the pan on the eggs, "What, and you aren't now?"

"Uh, well, since ‘the net,’ we're more connected than ever. It was different then. You used to bump into each other doing jobs, or you’d need someone to introduce you." Bobby rubbed his hand over his face, "Why am I telling you this?"

Loki looked over from the stove, "Because Sam wants us to get to know each other." Bobby huffed. "I meant what I said about giving him whatever life he chooses. I don't think he can give up hunting, but he doesn't really know another way to live.” He was flipping the omelet now, “Would you mind if I decorated the house a little bit for Christmas? I wanted him to go pick out a tree to cut down so we could string popcorn."

"Yea, that's fine. There is a place a few miles out where you can get a tree." Loki handed Bobby his dish and sprinkled cheese on it to finish it off. "My word, this looks good…"

"Enjoy! I'm going to check on Sammy," and Loki walked out the back door. He popped his head back in, "And thanks, by the way."

Loki found Sam still working on the Buick in the garage. He had replaced the exhaust system and was doing an oil change. Loki was whistling on the way in, so he heard him coming.

Rolling out from undeath the car with oil and sweat on his brow. "Hey," was all he could get out before Loki handed him a flower.

"It's a winter Jasmine, Jasminum nudiflorum."

Sam took the yellow blossom in his hand, "Naked Flower?"

"Huh? Ah, it's a Christmas flower. It blooms in the winter, and often on barren stems." His face lit up, and he winked at him, "Though, you are my little flower I’d like to see naked."

Sam kissed him on his cheek, "Thank you, it's beautiful."

"I was thinking after you get your next car done, we can go pick out a tree for the living room. What do ya' think?"

"Sounds good." Sam hoped to be done soon. Loki hung around, handing him the tools he needed to finish up the Buick, and helped his work on the Lumina. Once finished, they had lunch, and he cleaned himself up.

Loki had convinced Bobby to join them, and all four of them jumped into the Land Rover. "Nice ride," Bobby said.

"I have a hard time driving the Impala, and this does so much better in the snow." Bobby nodded his head and gave him directions to the tree farm. Loki led them up and down every row of the land so Sam could see all of the options. He didn't want to cut down a tree, but Loki convinced him he was supporting the local economy, and they were continuously replacing them. Within an hour, they were back at Bobby's and carried it into his living room."

Bobby pointed to the corner next to the fireplace, "Fireplaces don't work, but that's a good spot."

"Bobby," Sam began, but Loki told them out and told them not to come back until they were done with the 5th car.

* * *

Bobby and Sam approached the house that was lit up like the Griswold's. There were even snowmen in between cars. On top of the rusted pieces of junk, there was an army of snowmen! They were assaulted by the odor of the turkey roasting in the oven when they entered the house. However, they were distracted by the red and green that was everywhere they looked.

Loki managed to hang garland on all the door frames but avoided hanging wreaths on the doors for Sam's sake. They noticed the fireplace was clean, and it had logs heating the house.

"You fixed my fireplace..." Bobby stated.

"Hope you don't mind. This is a bundle of wood outside stacked against the house that should last the rest of the winter too," Loki said and put his hands in his pockets. The tree only had lights strung on it, but this was a small bundle of presents underneath.

Loki looked over at Sam. He was giving Bobby a side hug. He asked, "This is nice, isn't it?"

Bobby leaned in, "This will be the first Christmas I’ve had in many years." He looked a little watery-eyed. "I just wish Dean could be here."

"Me too," Sam said.

Loki clapped, "You guys are hungry, or do you need a little time to get cleaned up?"

Bobby retorted without a hint of sarcasm, "Geez, does he always insist on feeding people?"

"Yup! It's one thing I love about him." Sam replied and went over to Loki to hug him. He rolled onto his tiptoes to kiss her on her forehead.

Bobby looked at Sam. "Why don't you go get ready, and I will see if your magician needs any help."

Hmph, a Magician. Goddamn miracle maker he is. Both the men watched his ascend the stairs.

Bobby crossed his arms and addressed Loki, "What's your endgame?"

The Trickster was a bit put out, "Endgame? I told you, I want him to be happy."

"That's not good enough. He's happy, from what I can tell. I know you have plans. Tell me what they are."

Loki found himself a seat, "Fine." He whistled and called Vincent to his side. "Sam and I are going to court after this holiday. I intend to ‘woo’ him and make sure he has the best life he possibly can. Are you familiar with courtship?"

Bobby stammered, "It's an old fashioned term for dating."

Loki rolled his eyes. He has had this conversation before, "It's more than that. My ‘endgame’ as you call it, is for us to be wed."

Bobby's eyes bulged, "Say Whaaaat?"

"I told Sam I would never lie to him. I will grant you the same measure. Even more so in this instance." Loki stood up, "I know, it's uncalled for, but it’s… Destiny, I think. Destiny aside, there is still a choice, but I will do everything in my power to win his love."

Dumbfounded, Bobby asked, "How many wives have you had?"

Loki wrinkled his nose, "None. I have never been in love before."

"And I'm to believe you are in love with Sam?" Bobby scratched his beard, "I'm having a hard time with this. How old are you?"

"I don't look at time like you do."

"Exactly, that's my problem. If he hunts, he's got maybe 20 years if he's lucky, 50 if he doesn't. Are you gonna’ stand by his side when he has arthritis and wets his pants?"

Loki didn't waver, "Yes, if that's what he agrees to."

"You say that like he has another option."

Trying not to dismiss the older man’s claims, "His possibilities are endless."

"Is he gonna turn out like you?"

Loki paced but was quick with a response, "Hell no! He is a creature unto himself. He will shine brighter than the stars themselves given a chance."

Bobby thought about this for a moment. "And you will protect him and put his welfare beyond your own?"

Loki sat back down, and the chair let out a puff of air, "My existence depends on him now." He sagged in his spot while looking up to meet Bobby's gaze.

Bobby pursed his lips and straightened his cap, "That creates a dangerous man."

"I never said I wasn't dangerous. But any Winchester could be as dangerous as I am, I would know. I was hunted by two of them and you … If it had been anyone else, they wouldn't have gotten the drop on me." Bobby smirked with pride on his face. Loki continued, "Look, I don't ask for permission, and I don't ask for forgiveness, but I will ask for your blessing because you are the only family he left.” He rubbed his chin, “My only request is that you stay in his life."

Bobby walked towards Loki, and he stood up. "I never imagined I'd be having this conversation with you nonetheless. Son, you have my approval, but my warnings stay in place. even if I don't end you, I think he might."

Loki smiled so wide and gave Bobby a big ole hug. "That's great! Thanks, papa bear!"


	12. Christmas Vacation Part III

Sam descended the stairs after Loki finally released Bobby from his hug, "What’s going on?" 

"Bobby just gave us his permission!" He scooped him up in his arms and spun him around. "After this holiday, we're taking one of our own!"

Sam laughed from the excitement, then his words sunk in as he set him down, "You asked Bobby for approval for... Us dating?"

He nodded vigorously, "Courting you Samshine. Why are you so surprised when I follow human customs?"

"Because you live by your own rules?"

He threw his head back in amusement, pulling him closer in the process, "Yes, but it is the hen that turns the rooster's neck."

Sam patted him on the chest. "You will never cease to surprise me," smiling into him.

"Then I vow to continue to try my Samanberry," he said and kissed him at the temple.

Bobby cleared his throat, "Are we gonna eat or wait for the second coming of Christ?"

Loki and Sam finally pulled away from each other and Loki spoke, "Turkey is done, I'll carve. Side dishes are on the counter if you could put them on the table. There is milk in the fridge, otherwise, the liquor cabinet is full."

Bobby headed towards the cabinet opening it and said, "A man that knows the good stuff in life is a friend indeed." He pulled out a bottle of merlot and brandy and poured them each a glass. Loki finished up the turkey as they had a seat and set it as the centerpiece.

"Looks great!" Sam said, Loki was pleased.

Loki asked, "Would anyone like to say grace?" Both Bobby and Sam looked at each other confused, Bobby raised an eyebrow, at least he wasn't alone in his confusion.

"Come on, just because I am the God of mischief doesn't mean I'm a heathen!"

It was Sam who began to pray as he had as a young child, "Dear Lord, thank you for this bountiful meal and our company. May our brother Dean find peace though he is not with us. Amen."

Loki and Bobby both said Amen in the chorus before passing dishes. A meal that was silent was a good meal indeed. Loki asked, "So do you guys do gifts on Christmas Eve or Christmas day?" Neither of them had an answer because they hadn't celebrated Christmas in so long. "How about tonight then? Christmas day is usually reserved for the kiddies."

After dinner they sat around the tree, conversing about cars and then later about hunting while they strung popcorn on a string. They hung it among the lights but the tree was missing it’s tradition. "I was told that Christmas decorations are a story. Since this is the first Christmas tree you've had in many years, I thought I would do the honor and create our first ornament." He handed over a globe that appeared to be hand-painted. It was Bobby's house the way it looked this evening. It said Singer/Winchester 2007. Bobby shook it in his hand and snow began to fall. "It's enchanted," Loki stated. Sam was happy to hang it on the tree after he took his turn marveling at it.

Loki handed out the first gift and gave it to Sam, "This one is from Vincent." It was tall and cylindrical, he could tell through the wrapping it was a little squishy. Next, he handed a small box to Bobby.

Loki watched as they opened up their gifts. Sam knew it must have been the coffee mug when Bobby ripped apart the paper. He looked at him opening the cover and he chuckled when he pulled it out. "This is great. I didn't know they made such a thing." Sam just nodded his head in Loki's direction, "Thank you, you guys."

Sam unwrapped his gift and it was a set of 5 tennis balls. When Vincent saw them he wagged his tail and barked. He took one out of the packaging and gave it to him. "Thanks. Vincent, we'll get good use out of these, won't we boy." He grabbed it by his teeth and brought it to his resting spot to get it slobbery.

Bobby handed Sam a small, long box, he also handed Loki a rectangular box, both wrapped in newspaper. Sam said to Bobby, "You didn't need to."

"Open it," he replied. He did and it was a beautiful silver blade with a leather handle. "Oh Bobby, it's perfect!" He ran his thumb along the blade and it was as sharp as it should be. He got up from his chair and gave him a hug. Loki opened up his gift next and it was a hand-carved wooden bead rosary.

Bobby said, "I wasn't sure who his friend was, but I figured any friend of Sam should have a good rosary."

"This is very nice, thank you. I'm assuming it's blessed?"

"What's the point of giving a rosary that hasn't been blessed?" Bobby said with no malice in his voice. Loki then placed it around his neck and tucked it in his shirt. Sam thought this was peculiar but wasn't going to call it sacrilegious, not knowing Loki's intent.

Loki then handed the next gift to Bobby, the book. He unwrapped it and stared at it in awe. "Well, this is a rare one." He had done what Sam did and flipped it around in his hands. Careful of the binding. He then paged through it a bit and stopped and asked, "Where did you get this?"

Sam said it was a copy from Loki's collection. "This is a... MySpace page for deities… I have never seen some of this lore before…" Bobby couldn't tear his eyes from the pages.

That is, until Loki spoke up, "There is a chapter in there on me. Don't judge me harshly when you get there though, I was a young kit." Bobby turned his head immediately. "You'll get there, so don't worry about your scruffy face," and winked.

Sam scoffed. He can't put anything past him. Though, he wondered what was written on those pages. Bobby closed the book and set it on his armchair, "Thanks Loki, you just remember our conversation."

"Next up! My Samanshine!" He handed him a slightly heavy box. He unwrapped it slowly to discover it was a brand new laptop. "You have 3 terabytes of storage, tons of ram, and a built-in cloud drive. It also has a separate processor to access the dark web should you need to access anything sinister from around the world."

"Wow Loki! Thank you! I would say this is too much, but I know you by now." He got up to give him a hug, but he merely pulled him into his lap.

"You're my beau. Nothin' but the best for you." He looked into his eyes and they were full of devotion. He kissed him on the lips. Sam felt a little trepidation, it was his turn to give Loki his gift. He turned to Bobby, "Does your piano still work?"

"Uh, not sure?" He replied.

Loki piped up, "Sure does! Is that my gift?" He asked excitedly, bouncing him on his lap. "Are you going to play us a song?"

Sam bit his lip, "Yes." Sam knew Loki comprehended the significance of this gift, he was just as eager to play for him as he was to be an audience. He hopped off his lap and they followed to the library to find the piano in almost pristine shape.

He sat down and played a few notes to hear how it sounded. "Merry Christmas Loki." His fingers started to play his favorite Cat Stevens song, he was a little shy at first but found his groove...

"Well, if you want to sing out, sing out

And if you want to be free, be free,

'Cause there's a million things to be

You know that there are…"

His voice was beautiful, and he didn't miss a beat. Loki stood a little straighter at the third verse.

"You can do what you want

The opportunity's on

And if you can find a new way

You can do it today

You can make it all true

And you can make it undo

You see, ah ah ah

It's easy, ah ah ah

You only need to know..."

Sam finished and they both clapped. Loki pecked him on the cheek, "Best gift ever! Thank you. Do you have another one in ya'?"

"I can manage one more. It's not a Christmas tune though."

"The night is long, I'll take care of those. Go on Sammy boy," he began to play 'I Don't Like Mondays' by The Boomtown Rats. Loki helped sing the backup vocals, Bobby tapped along enjoying the entertainment.

The rest of the evening went swimmingly. Loki ended up playing carols while his hunters butchered their way through basic Christmas lyrics. Grumbling Joy to the World was laughable, and who knew Jingle Bells had so many cuss words in it! They did have a Merry Christmas Eve and there was still one more day of cheer to spread.


	13. Bobby's POV

His head throbbed and his bones ached. "Why don't I ever learn my lesson?" He laid in bed thinking about the last two days he spent with Sam and Loki. He was glad to be in Sam’s company again and Loki was a good buffer, he kept things interesting too. As much as he didn't want to admit it, they made a cute couple.

He had never seen Sam smile so much. Life had royally shit on the both of them.

Shit, Sam was playing the piano again. He didn't think John knew how talented he was. That kid learned how to play Mozart the first summer they spent with him. He reminisced about how he fixed up Mrs. Sponge's Cadillac for lessons from Sam. Guilt welled up in him when he realized what ‘carefree’ Sam looked like. How he didn't do more to convince John to let give him a more normal life.

Son of a bitch, if he was going to let Sam worry about him now. Maybe he could convince him to stay longer to get back on track though. He couldn't ask for help though, could he? No.

... Little did he know Loki was awake and picking up on his musings.

Bobby came down to the kitchen to find Sam and Loki ready to start the day. Loki set the coffee pot on the table.

"Bobby, how long is your backlog?" Sam asked.

He squawked, "Ugh, do we need to go there at this hour?"

"Yeah, it's 10 AM."

"Fine, the stack is there."

Sam leafed through the papers, "Bobby, this isn't organized or anything."

"I know I have more phone calls coming in from hunters on the job than I do cars now. The blasted phones constantly ring and I'm behind on both fronts."

"We'd like to help," Loki piped up.

"Oh, sod off."

"Tough. You need a system, Bobby," Sam said.

They offered to extend their stay a few days longer. They spent Christmas day organizing and prioritizing the work on the cars. Sam was eager to put his mechanical skills to use and get the more complicated jobs done. He was relieved to have an extra set of hands for those jobs. They set a schedule for the next two weeks to get all the cars completed and allocated time for new jobs to come in.

Loki pulled the phone records to see how many inbound calls Bobby was taking on a weekly basis. They ranged anywhere from 3-7 a day, between 5-30 minutes per call. He had Sam record new voicemails for each of the lines to sound more professional. He also reconfigured the lines so Bobby could transfer the call to the library if he needed to do research while on the phone. They couldn't do much to help Bobby with running Hunter Home Base, but they could try to make the workload more manageable.

Sam and Bobby put in long hours in the shop. He was tired and sweaty, but he needed a swift kick in the pants. He was getting old, but not old enough to give up and die yet, his joints still had some cartilage left!

They were working on replacing the piston rings on the Chevy and Bobby broke the silence. "Sam? I don't want to piss you off or nothin', especially after all they help you two have been giving, but there's somethin’ I wanted to talk to you about."

"What is it, Bobby?"

"That man of yours. I'm not sure he's a trickster." He braced himself for Sam’s anger, but it didn't come.

He put his wrench down, "It's ok. I don't think he is either. Was it something you read in the book?"

"Nah, it was all pretty straightforward. It's as if he perfectly imitates a trickster. But he's more than that ain't he?"

Sam wiped his hands on a rag, "Yea… he is. He is so much  _ better _ than that. I trust him, and honestly, I'm fine with it."

"You sure? I can do some more research."

"I'm sure. I don't think you'll have any luck anyway." Sucking in a breath, “Whatever he actually is, we’ll only know when he wants to tell us.”

Bobby didn't really want to let it go, but they had done extensive research and never came across any being that held so much power. He only prayed Loki would live up to his promises.

"Ok, why don't you cover those cylinders then."


	14. Relaxing

Loki clapped and rubbed his hands together. "Well Sugar Plum, where should we vacation? Anywhere you want. We can hit the sand in Hawaii, pop on over to Dubois." He pursed his lips and wiggled them around, "Paris, London, Baby, why don't we go to Kokomo..."

He laughed, "I guess I haven't been anywhere with a warm sandy beach in a long time." He poked him. "Hey, keep your pants on! I'm thinking over here. If you can zap us anywhere, what about Thailand?"

Loki wrapped an arm around his waist and kissed his temple. "You always keep things interesting don't you..." he mused. "Why don't you get packed and let me know if you need anything you want for our stay."

Sam's closet held everything he could practically need or want. Bathing suits, lounging clothes, sex toys, sunglasses. The drawers were actually labeled. He filled his suitcase and changed into the pink swim trunks he found and slipped on a basic black tee. Glancing at himself in the mirror he realized he did look cute in pink! He looked so much better than when Loki had found him. He had gained some of his muscle back and the dark circles under his eyes had almost completely gone away.

Brushing his hair; he looked fresh, normal, and human.

They met in the kitchen and breakfast was waiting for him. Two eggs, a piece of toast, and fruit. Next to his place setting, there were about 10 books. He sat down at the island and felt Loki's eyes on his. "Well, don't you look nice," Loki was wearing a Tommy Bahama button down with short khaki shorts and his Elvis glasses around his neck.

Blushing at his comment he murmured, "Thanks." Picking up a piece of toast and began looking through the books. He noticed they were all fantasy novels. Lord of the Rings, Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norell, Game of Thrones... "Are these suggestions or mandatory?"

Loki snorted at him, "Hardly. You can bring any books you'd like. You know how I like themes." Sam pulled a couple of the George R. R. Martin books closer to him. They finished their breakfast and he stood up and took Loki’s hand. "Ready?"

"As I can be," he replied.

In a flash, they were in front of a modest villa in Thailand. Sam gasped as the warm air hit his skin and he closed his eyes in the blinding sun. Loki pulled out a pair of sunglasses from his pocket and handed them to him. The sun was bouncing off Loki's golden skin and hair and he looked beautiful. Sam wrapped his body around him and Loki squeaked. Kissing his neck, he swung him around while Vincent barked at the excitement. Sam put him down, pinched his butt, and said, “Vamos chico.”

They walked up the stone path to their getaway house. Once inside, the space was almost completely open to the sea in front of them. The kitchen was off the left and a bedroom to the right. He walked past it all and found himself standing on the patio. Vincent ran past his and was already sniffing around the beach marking his territory. There were hammocks tied to palm trees and a cabana with a large bed in the center. It only took a few steps before he found his feet in the warm sand. He turned around to see Loki watching him with his hands on his hips, and he looked happy. A look he didn't think he had ever seen on him.

Sam smiled at him and walked back towards him. He didn't bother asking if he approved. He just cocked his head to the side and said, "Sugar, I'd give you the whole world." Sam believed those words to be true, he placed his hands on Loki’s sun-brushed face and kissed him gently on the lips. Pulling back, Loki continued staring at Sam’s lips when the taller fella’ said, "Last one in the water is a rotten egg!" He took off but stopped abruptly and shouted back, "... but not literally!" Loki was hot on his heels and swooped him up over his shoulders and running towards the water.

"No, no no!" Sam yelled, but it was too late. He was officially dunked. He burst out of the water playfully lunging at Loki and he allowed himself to be submerged. They played in the water splashing and diving for shells. Sam was on his back floating and Loki came up and placed his hands on his underside and was spinning his body. He repositioned himself and wrapped his arms and legs around him. "Thank you. Thank you for everything."

"My pleasure. Are you getting hungry?"

"Yessss."

"Race you to the shore?"

"Nah, carry me," Sam grinned at him and splashed his feet...

Loki chastised him, "I have created a monster!” Promptly dropping him in the water.

Inhaling breaths when he breached the waterline, Sam swept Loki in his arms."I'll carry you." At first, he struggled against Sam’s ridiculousness, but he acquiesced. It wasn't much work for Sam until the water was lower than his knees. He then bent over and lifted him onto his shoulder. He was heavy, but it wasn't a difficult task.

Loki hollered from behind him, "You can put me down Samsquanch!" It was only until he got to the stairs of their hut he put him down.

"Easy peasy." Sam swiped his hands together, slightly out of breath.

"Thanks?" Loki chuckled and kissed him chastely.

"Such a quick kiss for my physical feat," Sam teased. "My reward for you would have been greater."

Loki stood before him, then pulled roses from behind his back, "Doth these make your heart more settled?" He handed them to him.

Sam held them to his nose and breathed in deeply. "Indeed, my Knight of Mischief." He then touched the flowers down on Loki’s right shoulder and then his left shoulder.

Loki sobered a bit and said in a slightly serious tone, "Before I would have traveled the less feared path, now you shall have my bravery. I endeavor to defend you and you have my fealty. As you are the chink in my armor, my Lord."

His words were a vow, that much was clear. The moment was over as quickly as it came when Vincent dropped a large stick in front of them and barked.  _ Good timing, dog. _

Loki tossed the stick and they entered the villa. Lunch was an assortment of fruit, cheese, and deli meat. He chimed up, "What do you want to do tonight?"

"I'm not sure. What do people do in paradise?" he responded.

"Make love on the beach until the sun comes up. Buuuut, we aren't normal people are we?" he blushed and shook his head. "We can have a bonfire and play 20 questions! Or we could play truth or dare!"

Sam laughed, "Play truth or dare with you? I'd rather exorcise a demon."

He hung his head dramatically and pouted, "Am I really that bad?"

Sam threw a strawberry into his mouth, "Yup!"

That evening when they laid down to sleep, hope lingered in the air. They were finally at ease and fell asleep in each other's arms.


	15. Conversing

Even Vincent was having a great time on their vacation. He would bring them sticks and tennis balls and play fetch until he was spent. Today was no different, the little dog trotted off to nap in the master bedroom while Sam and Loki rested in the cabana. The sun was high and the canopy provided the perfect amount of shade, leaving sandy shores and blue skies in their periphery.

Sam stretched on his stomach, Loki trailing his fingers up and down his back. Sam loved his lazy touches. Smiling into the pillow he reflected on how much he has grown to care for this mischievous man.

"Sam," Loki said softly.

"Yes?" He murmured back.

"This is the happiest I have been in centuries." Tracing some of the smaller scars on his back Sam’s breath hitched at his words and he desperately wanted him to continue. He tried rolling over but was pressed back into the mattress. Instead, Loki laid down beside him and shared his pillow so they were face to face.

Sam gazed at his Pagan’s eyes. The color was constantly changing with his mood. Today they were more auburn with tiny flecks of red around the iris. He could barely look away until Loki’s lips started moving. "Do you want me to get rid of these scars for you?"

It was an unexpected question but asked sincerely, "Hmmm." Sam sat up cross-legged, lifting his elbow to show him the scar there. "This one I got when I was fifteen, I thought I would try to learn how to skateboard, but I hit a rock..." Pointing to his stomach," This one was from a bottle rocket," he chuckled remembering how Dean tried to show him the safe way to light fireworks... “He never forgave himself for that one. The ones on my shins are from being dragged. Oh! This one in my shoulder was a clean shot from Bella. I got lucky, it went straight through." He made the sign of the holy cross. 

He twisted around, Loki could see while the bullet exited. It narrowly missed shattering his shoulder blade. Sam pouted, “It did go right through my anti-possession tattoo though. I had to get a new one, sooo I put it on the bottom of my foot." Sam straightened his leg and wiggled his toes so Loki could see. Loki snatched his foot and began massaging his arch.

His scars were reminders of who he was, where he had been, "Thank you. But I guess I would like to keep them.” Rubbing along the jagged skin below his clavicle he asked, “Is there a way you could fix my tattoo though? Dean and I got them together."

Loki cast him a mischievous smile, "That my darling is easy. Can I add a little extra to it?"

Sam tugged at his earlobe, "If I don't like it, can you take it back?"

"Of course!" Loki rubbed his hands together and gently held his middle finger and index finger on Sam’s warm shoulder over his bullet wound. It was a tingling sensation and Sam squinted to see his flesh fusing back together, leaving his skin unmarred from damage. The tattoo ink bleeding back to where it once was. Then he witnessed vines sprouting, surrounding the original tattoo, but never touching. The vines kept growing and soon red roses were budding from it. It began to wrap over the top of his shoulder and then encompassed his shoulder blade. 

Sam, was enraptured by the flourishing pedals on his flesh as his tattoo came to life before him, "It's beautiful," he murmured. The roses varied in size but they were similar as were the thorns. The ink itself had traces of gold that added depth. 

Loki had scooted closer and assessed his work, caressing his shoulder, "It's not as beautiful as you." Pulling two mirrors out of thin air he handed one to Sam, kneeling behind him holding his up so Sam could take in the back. Directly over his old exit wound was an engraved lock in gold nestled between the roses. At its center, there was a skeleton keyhole filled in black. It was extraordinary.

Sam angled the mirror and searched Loki’s face while he was busy inspecting his handiwork. He looked so unguarded, human but that was far from the truth.

Loki caught his expression in the mirror and his entire face lit up with joy, “You really like it?” 

Sam turned around and kissed him, “I love it!” 

He found himself flat on his back with his little Trickster straddling him exclaiming, “Gotcha’!” The light breeze fluttered through his blonde hair along with the white curtains attached to the posts of the cabana. 

Sam asked, “What’s the significance of the lock?”

Loki reached out and stole one of Sam’s hands and brought it to his lips proclaiming, “Because you are the key to my heart.”

Involuntarily Sam responded, “Awwww…” 

Loki dropped his hand and poked Sam in the ribs, “Don’t you ‘Awww’ me!” 

With his quick reflexes, Sam began tickling his Trickster resulting in Loki’s, not lightweight body bouncing on top of him  _ and  _ his kidneys. Shouting, "You're gonna break me!"

Pulling his hips back, he laid flush on his hunter, "Well I have put you back together once, what’s another for old times sake?" Leaning down Loki demanded entrance to his mouth with his tongue. When oxygen became a priority, their lips separated and both blasted each other with their wide, dimpled smiles.

Loki nipped at his bottom lip with his teeth, planting kisses down his neck, accompanied by unhurried strokes along his ribs. With a moan, Sam dug his fingernails into Loki’s back spreading his legs apart for the smaller man’s frame to slip between.

Feeling his hard length nestle next to his own, pleasure coursed through Sam’s body. Well, this was a new sensation he thought. He had never been so aroused in his whole life, especially by a penis. Tensing slightly, Loki stopped immediately. "What's wrong? What is it?" His lips were red and he looked down at him with earnest concern.

"Um, it's nothing, I didn't mean to... To stop this," gesturing between them.

"Well, we aren't going any further until you explain yourself." He rolled off Sam and he put his hand up to his face needing to remedy this. He didn't want his human to have any doubts.

"I'm sorry, I just- I've never actually been with a man before and my attraction to you... Uhh, it overwhelmed me."

He stared at it with an intensity that made him want to retreat. He tried to sound calm but his eyes radiated something darker. Rolling his whole head, "Ummm... What do you mean you've never been with a man? Are you saying you're a virgin?"

"No, I'm not a virgin," he snapped back. "I’ve had girlfriends. What’s the big deal?” Loki took a deep breath and fled the bed, resting himself on the cabana post. Focusing on the horizon trying to restrain himself.

Sam growled and grabbed his shirt off of the floor, "Why are you being such a dick? You can't wait to be inside me then be pissed you'd be the first one."

The demi-god pinched the bridge of his nose, "You're right, I'm sorry." Finding the edge of the mattress he took a seat, hunched over. A few moments passed and Sam wasn't going to budge. "Will you sit down with me?" The mattress shifted with Sam’s weight and he took his hand in his. Still unable to meet his gaze, he rubbed small circles on the back of his hand with his thumb. "You underestimate the importance of your virtue."

Sam began to pull away, "You've got to be kidding me!" Loki didn't let go, rather grabbed him and tugged him back down next to him.

"I’m serious. This changes things." Loki scooted back and rested against pillows. He patted the spot in between his legs. “Look, virtue is a concept. It’s not black and white.” Sam’s nose crinkled and he looked away. Loki pleaded, "Please? I need you close." Sam hesitated but crawled over resting his back on his chest. Sam could feel Loki’s heart pounding. Warm arms wrapped around his center and he felt the briefest of kisses between his shoulder and neck.

"I have been running for millenniums now, and I- I'd like to stop for a while. There are things I need to tell you but I don't have the courage yet." He dipped his chin in the crook of Sam’s shoulder. "You make me stronger, better. I’m sorry if I hurt you.” Taking a steadying breath, “You are the most precious being in all of existence. Your virtue is a rarity, and we must respect that. It’s just that, if I’m going to be your first, let’s say male lover, then the... Pagan magic in me is going to respond to that. I’m just asking for a little time."

Sam exhaled, he still didn't understand his preoccupation with his virtue given that he had been with girls, but he was beginning to understand that they needed to take it slow. "Are you asking me to stay with you?"

"Were you planning on leaving me?"

"No." Sam pressed his head into his. In a few short months, he could no longer imagine life without him. He sighed, "Life is cruel Loki. As much as I want to believe we can carry on the way we have, I'm nervous..."

"I know sweetheart, I am too. Not much, but enough to not want to go back to the man I am without you. You have domesticated me. A Winchester domesticated me! Good grief, if Thor could see me now! I'd be laughed off the sacrificial altar."

Swiveling around Sam’s big hand pointed at the Pagan God. "Hey! You domesticated me first!" Loki tried to bite his finger and he protested, "I was all stake first and… Stake again!"

The humor was returning to their relationship, "Both you and Dean gave me a run for my money at the college. I never had to fake my death  _ like that  _ for humans before. Cheeky monkey, you." Loki pulled Sam’s legs around his waist so he could pull him closer, declaring "I'm never letting you go." Sam ran his fingers down Loki’s spine, "You are going to be the death of me!"

Sam’s voice was full of husk, "No, it will take a lot more than  _ this _ to kill you. I know, I’ve tried..." Sam flicked his tongue across his lips. If he was going to hold his ‘virtue’ against him then he was going to remind him that it was his idea. He could feel him becoming hard once more and he rutted his front for friction. “Dean always said it was never pre-marital sex if you didn’t get married.”

Loki huffed, “Oh, Dean-O, he did give some good advice from time to time, didn't he? But let’s not bring up your brother when we both have boners.” Sam chortled and set his tongue to the nape of his neck.

Loki’s head rolled back, eyelids shut closed enjoying Sam’s touches. "If you keep at this, you will kill me. At least, my resolve and I'd really like your virtue to remain intact until we consummate our marriage."

"Our what?!" Sam jumped back. The only reason he wasn't on the other side of the cabana was that Loki’s hands had a firm grip on his ass.

His face was all devilish charm and his eyes danced with mischief. "Duh, that's the plan. I thought you were more perceptive than that Samanshine!" He bopped him on the bridge of his nose.

Sam joked, "Ha ha. You're overconfident."

"Ehh, If you look up the definition of confidence, there’s a picture of me. Wearing only a banana hammock. That's how confident I am!" Loki exclaimed.

Sam leaned back and rested his weight on his elbows. This cocky man in front of him plans to win his heart and marry him… Unbelievable. He took his time to catalog this moment. The small amount of scruff on Loki’s face, his blemish-free golden skin, the way his hair flips to one side… His lazy smile and the way his eyes shine so bright. Sam was shameless in his appreciation of his body until then the weight of Loki’s sentiment settled.

Sliding off his lap, he backed off the mattress, "I have never thought of marriage before. I assumed I'd die a hunter, " he shrugged. 

Loki picked at his fingernails avoiding Sam, "What do you think of marrying me?"

Quick to respond, "I have a significantly shorter lifespan than you. What do  _ you _ think of that?"

He perked up when Sam didn’t deny his proposal flat out. "I am a greedy man, I want everything you have to give. Marriage to me would be…” Flipping his hand, “-Unique to say the least."

Sam chuckled. Of course, it would. "Go on."

Loki rubbed his chin. "To be honest, I'm not entirely sure. I have been giving it some thought and I think there are a few options." Loki cleared his throat, "Sam, what I'm proposing should not be taken lightly. This is just our first conversation."

Settling back down on the mattress he spoke, "Okay, I'm listening.”

"Under no conditions will I  _ ever _ leave your side. I will be devoted to you, on every level regardless of your choice, even if that means our relationship doesn’t move past deity slash mortal human.”

“But we can have sex?”

“You’re insatiable! I love it. Yes, we will have sex. Lots and lots of hot sex Sambone.” Loki leaned in and kissed him. Returning to their serious chat, Loki elaborated, "Before sex though, we should be on the same page. What I’m suggesting is different than going to a church. 

There are two different levels of bonding where we’re concerned. The first would be for us to share our essence. It would almost be like our souls holding hands. It would be reversible. You’d sense me at all times, the closer I am the more connected we would be. Your life would be longer, probably matching mine. But… If we did revert, you  _ could _ die.” Loki held up his hand, “It's not a threat but it could happen. Or you would just go back to being human at the point we bonded. Honestly, it’s kinda’ a crapshoot." Loki waited for him to acknowledge what he said.

"There are also traditional human ceremonies and Pagan ceremonies, but if I’m being honest, I’d like to stay away from blood magics."

Sam frowned, "That isn't bonding though. What is the second level you mentioned?"

"Clever Beau, I’m not surprised this would have gone over your head.” He scratched his scalp, “Well, it would be a deeper bond. Our souls would knot and merge as one. Though, I’m not certain you would survive since you’re human. Your soul could be consumed by my… Essence so to speak. Obviously, I’m not eager to try that at all.” Biting his lip Loki divulged, “I just- I just need to be closer to you.” 

Accepting this, “Yeah, I don’t want to burn with you, if that’s okay.”

Loki grabbed his hand again, "Saman-Schnoodle, I don't know if you would or not.” He rushed, “Don't freak out, but I'm not sure you are entirely human anymore. Or you’re human plus so to speak?"

Sam chewed on his bottom lip, "Is it what the yellow-eyed demon did to me? My abilities?"

"Yea.. but I don't think they are dormant." Sam began to fidget. "No matter how they came to you, they are  _ yours _ . They are a tool and you have the right to choose to embrace them, or not."

Distracting himself by the clouds he uttered, "It was practically Dean's dying wish that I don't use them…"

"Well, Kiddo, he wasn't an expert on the supernatural. If you choose this path, I can be your anchor. They could save your life one day, or someone else's. There is no telling what you're capable of."

Sam bit the inside of his cheek, "What if I fall into the darkness?"

Loki placed tender kisses on his palm and reassured him, "There will always be shades of grey. But I promise you, you're too bright to fall into the shadows. I would never let anyone manipulate or corrupt you.” He paused, “This is just one of the many things we needed to discuss. I want you to keep an open mind and make your own decisions."

"Okay," Sam agreed.

The sun shone through the cabana now and bounced off of Loki’s shoulders, "We could be wed in steps if you’d like." That seemed reasonable to Sam, but it didn't feel like that would be enough. Loki went on, "I want to have the deepest bond with you. One day. If that's possible.

...I have been experiencing a sort of a pull towards you since we have been together, and before that too I suppose..." Loki hesitated, "Your essence calls to me, to bind you to me." He blushed. Sam understood this continued level of honesty was new for the Pagan God, "As I said, it’s all just food for thought.”

Sam thought that Dean would be completely against this; everything about their relationship and even friendship, but he was gone now. 

Hearing Sam’s thoughts Loki hypothesized, “If Dean showed up tomorrow or after we… bond or wed. Would you regret this? Would you regret what we have?” He didn’t expect an answer, and Sam was in no place to give him one since he mentioned his older brother. Instead, he patted his thigh, “It’s just one of those things you need to consider.”

“Right now I can’t imagine being separated from you.” He climbed back into Loki’s lap. “Give me some time. Until then, how about we promise each other... Promise each other to one another, until later."

"Quite the poet you are Sammy Boy!" Laughing, he held him closer and repeated to him, "I promise myself to you... Until later,” and punctuated his statement with a wink.


	16. Commiserating

The Trickster suggested, "How about we go to the main island and go dancing tonight?"

Sam grinned at him, "I have other ideas for tonight since we’ve promised each other ourselves... Until later, " he giggled. The sun was beginning to set, and the sky was full of a beautiful array of colors.

Rolling them on their side, Loki persisted, "Do elaborate my mon chéri."

Sam drew heart shapes on Loki’s chest, "I'd like to explore your body and choose a spot for your tattoo."

"My tattoo? I hadn't thought of that… Where should we put it?"

“Hmmm…” Sam kissed his throat, slipping his tongue over his clavicle, arching his chest, and bumping against the Pagan as he worked his way down his body. Every kiss he dropped scorched him as he searched for the perfect spot.

Sam made it to his hip and pulled the gold speedo down slowly with his index finger. Loki bucked against the madness of the sensation as his hunter scraped his teeth against his hip bone. Revering his God, his lips moved to the outside of his right thigh and placed one last kiss. Sam lifted his head and looked at him. "Here. This is a good place," he trailed his fingers along his muscular leg.

Loki studied him from his position, "You little minx. Ok. Close your eyes and picture what it looks like." Sam felt Loki on the periphery of his mind as he conjured the image, mentally feeling him zooming in and out as he coaxed the design from him...

When he felt his presence receded, he opened his eyes. He wasn't sure how long they were closed, but he needed to adjust to the bright sunlight. When he could focus his sight, he witnessed Loki admiring his tattoo. It was exactly what he had envisioned. The style was similar to his, the vines and thorns intertwined between the blossoms of roses. Extending from two inches above his hip, it fell a few inches short of his kneecap. There was a gold skeleton key in the center to complement his lock, surrounded by a compass. 

Even though the tattoo was proportional, it still seemed large on the smaller being that was bigger than life. Sam sat on his haunches in awe as he had marked a Pagan God.

Neither of them anticipated how connected they were becoming. Their bodies sought each other as more of their inhibitions fell away. Their movements were frantic as they tried to become one. Their breaths were ragged as they rolled and grasped at each other.

Sam wanted to climb on his lap and F' him senseless, but he knew they needed to take it slow. He was so horny it hurt, and needed relief. Loki was in the same position, and all he wanted was for him to be deep inside his partner.

Reaching down, he freed Loki’s erection and stroked him. Sam could barely fit his hand around him but didn't have time to think about that when he moaned into his mouth. He rolled on his back and began licking Loki’s nipples as he straddled him. He could feel his own wetness forming at the tip of his cock and was grateful for the bottoms of his swim trunk...

It didn’t deter Loki from rolling him back on top of him and placing his hand above Sam’s backside, pushing down their swim trunks until they were naked against each other. Loki’s finger instantly had lube at the tip, and he pressed his finger inside Sam, finding his prostate immediately. 

Sam groaned loudly and forced himself even closer to his Pagan. Loki managed to wedge his hand between the two of them, grabbing both their cocks as he jerked them off. Nudging Sam’s sweet spot again, he came undone, convulsing in his hand, inspiring Loki to cum himself.

Laying above the god, unable to move much, he pressed his lips to his chest and was finally able to raise his head to look at him, "Holy shit…"

Loki fell off him laughing, both covered in one another’s cum, but it didn't bother either of them. They were just too damned relaxed.


	17. Rising

As the sunset the next day, Sam looked himself over in the mirror for their first official date. He regretted running his hands through his hair as it was perfect after he styled it. His hands were clammy as he tried to re-arrange it to how it was. It's strange when you don't recognize yourself. His younger self would have been proud he had a significant other and stable life, but recent years taught him this was just an illusion. He took a shaky breath and went to find Loki.

"Good evening, handsome. You look ravishing." He hooked his arm in his, "Shall we?" The next moment they were standing on a dock with a beautiful city shining brightly in the background. They meandered through the busy streets will tourists milling about as Loki navigated to the club off the coastline.

The lights strung up seemed to sparkle against the sunset, and the breeze from the ocean kept some of the humidity at bay. He heard a guitar and some drums playing but couldn't pinpoint where it was coming from. The waiter led them to their table, and it was close to the dance floor where the band was playing. Was he really going to dance tonight?

Loki asked, "How's this?"

It was surreal. Sam responded, "This is fantastic! I'm out with you on a beautiful night. What else could you ask for?"

Their waiter spoke English, and they ordered drinks. Loki teased Sam, "Are you going to eat the local catch tonight, or would you rather eat imported beef?"

"Loki, Local fish is just fine." He reached his hand across the table. Drawing it back, he stood up and moved his chair next to Loki’s.

At first, he was surprised, but he liked this arrangement better. Loki queried, "Can't stand to be that far away from me?"

"I can't be close enough to you." Warmth bubbled inside Loki. He placed his hand on Sam’s thigh, slowly moving his hand higher up Sam’s linen suit pants. He reluctantly stopped his hand from traveling further. Sam stammered out, "Music's nice." 

Their server returned with fruity cocktails. Loki pulled out his swirly straw and threw it over his shoulder, "Those are for the tourists." Sam took his drink in hand and placed his plump lips around his straw and sucked deep while maintaining eye contact with Loki. He focused on his intensely and shifted closer to him, "Mmmm, I take back any comments about swirly straws."

Sam felt the alcohol fill his empty belly and smirked. He knew he was in for a buzz this evening. Over dinner, they constantly made googly eyes at each other as they shared their dishes. Loki ordered more cocktails, and they were as strong as before.

The dinner hour was over for most of the patrons, and several people were dancing. The music was definitely local; it was upbeat and had a solid rhythm.

Loki stood, "Let's boogie."

"Cool, but I have to go to the lavatory first. I'll be right back.” He wobbled as he stood up but was OK.

He saw Loki talking to an Asian man near the railing on his way back to their table. He approached them and noticed his disheveled appearance holding a bottle of wine in his hand. He was swaying a bit, but it looked like a friendly conversation.

Loki noticed Sam instantly and introduced them, "Royce, I'd like you to meet an old friend of mine, Gi Jong."

Sam didn't blink at the alias he created. Loki pushed into his mind that it was the masculine version of Rose. "Nice to meet you." He held out his hand, and Gi Jong grasped his hands with both of his and shook them enthusiastically.

Loki was teetering on his heels and asked, "What brings you to the island?”

Gi Jong leaned against the railing, "I am visiting an orphanage in town and I felt the sky shift. I wanted to see what it was, rather who it was, and who did I find? You!" He slung his arm around Loki, "Plus, I am out of wine." He shook his bottle a bit.

Sam looked curiously at Loki, and he shrugged, "What? It was supposed to rain."

Gi Jong's laugh was loud and contagious. "Ah, my friend, it is good to see you."

Gi jong took the last sip of wine, and a little dribbled down his chin. He wiped it with his sleeve, "I bring you news you seek."

Loki pursed his lips as if deciding if he wanted Sam to hear.

"What, do you not want to know?" Gi Jong asked. "Or you do not want me to say anything in front of your flower?"

"No, no. It's fine. What have you heard?"

"In America, this is much commotion over a man by the name of Dean Winchester returning from the underworld."

Loki and Sam both squeaked in unison, "What!?" Sam's stomach dropped, and his knees felt weak. He began trembling, "You-you’re lying."

Gi Jong shrunk back and raised his hands. He looked towards Loki for help. He took sympathy on the man, "Gi, Royce and I know Dean. Do you have any other info?"

Gi Jong became less tense darting between Loki and Sam, "No, sorry. You told me to keep my ear to the ground. I heard it from the Naturals this morning, but I could not find you."

All the color from Sam's face was gone, "Thank you, but we gotta’ go." Gi Jong placed a hand on each of their shoulders, "Many blessings. Until next time." He bowed and stepped back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because this is told from Sam’s perspective, I know it’s a big shock to have Gabriel unaware of Heaven’s call that Dean was saved from perdition. My only response is that he has been so far removed from Heaven that he didn’t think to tune into Angel Radio at this point during the impending Apocalypse.


	18. Greetings

Sam didn't even notice the change of scenery. "I need to see him. It might not even be Dean." Vincent recognized the shift, though. He trotted over and sat quietly by Sam’s feet.

Loki began to pace, "Ok. Call Bobby and see what he knows. I’ll get you where you need to go."

Sam dialed Bobby, and he confirmed that Dean was there and that they were looking for him. "I'm on my way." Loki must have been overhearing their conversation because the next moment, he was inside Bobby's kitchen. He looked around for Loki, and he was nowhere to be seen, "GODDAMMIT!"

Bobby came running when he heard his cursing, and Dean was right behind him. Sam ignored Bobby, and his eyes found Dean immediately. He was immobilized, "Hey ya, Sammy." As Dean approached him, Sam lunged at him. He deflected his attack quickly since he didn't have a knife.

"Who are you?" He hollered at his ‘brother.’

Dean shouted back, "LIKE YOU DIDN'T DO THIS?" Bobby interrupted and said he tested him every which way he knew. That it's really him, it dawned on Sam it really was his brother. "I know I look fantastic." Dean embraced his younger brother but pulled back. He was relentless, "So, tell me, what did it cost to bring me back. What did it cost? Was it just your soul or something worse?"

Sam was a bit confused with this line of questioning, "You think I made a deal?"

It was Bobby who asked, "Did you?" The conversation continued between the siblings.

"Well, I didn't."

Dean yelled, "Don't lie to me!"

"I'm not lying," he stared Dean down.

"So what now, I'm off the hook, and you're on? Is that it? You some demon's bitch?" He took a breath, "I didn't want to be saved like this!"

Sam replied quickly, "You know Dean, I wish I had done it."

His brother grabbed him by the shoulders, "There is no other way this could have gone down. Tell the truth!"

Bobby was about to intervene, but Sam shook loose, "I tried everything, that's the truth! I tried opening the devil's gate! Hell, I tried to bargain Dean, but no demon would deal. You were rotting in hell for months, for months, and I couldn't stop it. So, I'm sorry it wasn't me. Dean, I'm sorry."

As it went with arguments, it was over as fast as it started. "It's okay, Sammy, you don't have to apologize. I believe you."

Bobby was practically a third wheel. He said, "Don't get me wrong, I'm glad Sam's soul remains intact, but it does raise a sticky question-"

Dean interjected, "- If you didn't pull me out, then what did?"

The tension in the room quieted down, "Sam, mind telling us why you look like an ad campaign for a tropical island?"

Sam realized he was still dressed for his date in a tan linen suit with a flower lei around his neck. He pulled the lei off his neck and gulped at Bobby, "Did you tell him?"

"Tell me what?"

Here goes. Sam took a deep breath. "I was in Thailand having dinner with my… My boyfriend."

"Your boyfriend? Boyfriend? How the hell did you get here so quickly?"

"I think we should all sit," Bobby put three glasses down and poured the whiskey.

"Dean, you were gone. You left me all alone, and it was rough. The worst experience of my life."

Dean had the decency to look ashamed. "He found me in a hotel room... Contemplating… I had a gun..." he barely managed to finish.

"WHAT?” Dean was appalled Sam was going to... No, “Who is he? Where is your boyfriend right now? "

"He helped me, put my head back on, showed me how to live again." Dean was losing his patience. He rushed the last bit out and braced himself, "You've already met him. It's the Trickster, Loki."

Dean’s temper exploded, "You've got to be kidding me! You must be some kind of fucked up to saddle up with that monster!"

"Don't talk to me that way! You know nothing about him, or us!" He knew this wasn't going to be easy, but he wasn't going to let him dictate his life anymore.

Dean gritted his teeth, "Clearly, I can see just how important you are to him. He just dumped you here."

That was a blow he hadn't expected. It was true. He had abandoned him. His mind drifted back to the evening they lay in front of the fireplace in Yellowstone and his promise that he would defend them. Back to the cabana where he said he would always be by his side… Sam needed him right now, and he wasn't here. His voice was flat, "He must have had his reasons, and he will be able to help."

Dean rose from the table and leaned down, "Sammy, you've made some pretty shitty choices but fucking the Trickster is the worst! I don't even know who you are anymore."

Sam slammed his fist on the table and stood up. He slapped Dean across his face so hard he saw stars. "You arrogant prick! You're back from the grave for a day, and you think you have the right to pass judgment on me! He has NOT abandoned me. If anyone has, it's you!" With that, he slammed the kitchen door and walked into the yard.


	19. Apologizing

Dean was shocked. Bobby sat up a little straighter with a look of pride on his face. "Well son, you botched that up good."

"You're tellin' me." He took a swig from his glass and put it down with a clank. Bobby poured him more whiskey. "What should I do?"

"Give him some time. Loki ain't half bad." Dean looked in Bobby's direction, eyebrows to his hairline. "I met him at Christmas. There’s no doubt he's coming back. If you want to make things right with your brother, play nice and give im’ a chance."

Dean took another sip, "How can you possibly be okay with this?"

"As I said earlier, things were rough after you died. For the both of us. Sam and I fought about your remains then he left. He said you would need a body to come back to. I heard stories from a few other hunters… He was on a mission to kill every goddamn thing. He was reckless and brutal. He wouldn't return my calls. Then I got an email saying he was staying with a friend and getting help." He took a long swig from his whiskey, "Hell, I'm glad they found each other. It's odd, but when they came to visit, I didn't recognize him either." He pointed his finger at Dean, "But  _ that _ was a good thing. You didn't see him, Dean. He's good for him."

"Shit, I really did fuck up didn't I?"

Bobby leaned back in his chair, "Yep."

  
  


Sam snuck back into his room earlier. Hearing a knock on the door he knew it was Dean. He was so overwhelmed by the turn of events he didn't know what to do. He opened the door and Dean asked if he could come in. Sam moved away and gave him entrance. He walked in and sat on his bed. "Listen, I'm really happy to see you." He looked at his hands and rubbed them together. "You had every right to move on. You're my brother and I love you."

Sam sat down beside him, "I love you too. I'm glad you aren't in Hell anymore."

"Me too."

Reaching behind his neck, he unclasped his necklace and gave it back to Dean. It was the one Sam had given to him when they were little kids.

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it..."

Sam asked, "What was it like?" 

"What, Hell? I don't know, I must have blacked it out. I don't remember a damned thing."

"Thank God for that. Let's go do some research and see what we can find out."

Sam had changed into old jeans and a t-shirt he found in a drawer. They found Bobby in the library paging through books. He closed the book he was looking at, "I'm not getting anywhere here." He looked towards Dean, "Listen, no demon is letting you lose out of the goodness of their heart. They have to have something nasty planned. We don't know what they're planning and we have a pile of questions. We need help." Bobby paused, "I know a psychic, maybe she has heard the other side talking."


	20. Disclosing

Sam's phone rang, the caller ID said  _ Anonymous _ . He answered it not expecting to hear Loki's voice on the other end, “How you doing Sammy?"

Anger surged up, "Excuse me? Don't call me Sammy, you ditched me!"

There was only silence on the other line of the line. "Oh, and now you have nothing to say? Unbelievable."

"Fine SAM. You are dealing with some powerful entities right now and I'm sorry if my self-preservation is in overdrive right now!" He snapped back into the phone. Shit. Loki rarely calls him Sam. "You're dealing with angels now."

"Bullshit. Angels aren't real. Someone would have heard of them," he scoffed.

"And that should make you afraid Kiddo. Whoever this angel is, has never interacted with humans before otherwise they would know they can't communicate the way they’re trying to." Loki was silent again. "Are you alone?"

"Yeah, Bobby and Dean are in the barn right now warding the place. I think they are trying to summon it."

Sam could hear Loki actually swallow. "They should  **not** be doing that! It won't make a lick of difference anyhow. They can't ward against an angel."

"Why? Aren't angels the good guys? Wait, how do you know so much about angels?"

"Doll, I have been around for a very, very long time. I have survived because it's none of my business. Heaven does not interfere in the workings of humanity, not really anyway."

"But they let the Pagans do whatever they see fit?" Sam instantly regretted saying that. "I'm sorry Loki, but you owe me an explanation."

Loki sighed, "Not over the phone." Sam was transported to their home in Washington. Their? He shook his head. If he wasn't so agitated he would have considered that statement more. 

Sam ended up in the kitchen calling for him but he didn’t respond. "LOKI!" He stopped in his tracks and looked at him. He looked wild. He advanced on him quickly and placed his hands on either side of his face, "Loki, please talk to me," he begged.

He pulled away and grasped his hands and led him to the couch. Loki was scared and it was evident in all of his mannerisms. Gazing into his eyes they were a swirl of color but they were vacant. Loki wasn’t there. "I. AM. HERE. For you, please tell me why you are so frantic." Sam put his hand on his chest and rubbed at his skin that was exposed from his button-down. He calmed instantly.

"OK." He breathed out hard, his eyebrows quirking, "You know how I told you I would never lie to you?" Sam pulled his hand away but Loki grabbed it and placed it back on his chest. "I haven't. I won't, you are too precious to me and that's why I am so..." he raked a hand through his blonde hair. He was getting more and more nervous the longer this went on. "Look, I am Loki. God of Mischief and whatever, but I wasn't born Loki. I was created. By God. I am Gabriel, An Archangel," his words came out so quickly, he was getting light-headed.

His mouth fell open, he could feel his jaw hanging but he couldn't close it.

Loki kindly raised his hand and pressed his mouth shut for him. He stared at him. He was waiting for a response, and all he could do was blink. He took a deep breath, and his eyes never left his face. He cared for him deeply, this is what he had been waiting for, his confession.

He licked his lips and pressed them to Loki’s tenderly. It was his time to be in shock now. "Loki..." he whispered. "Gabriel..." Sam pulled away and locked eyes with him. "You could have been an alien for all I knew, but that doesn't change how I feel about you. You are wonderful and funny. Irritating and more than I can handle. So please, go on, I'm here for you."

"Samuel Royce," he breathed and kissed his passion. Having his name spoken by anyone else would have been unsettling, but he wanted to hear it again even if he did make up his middle name, at least it wasn't ‘Samual Banana Pants Winchester’. 

"Sam."

He was going to faint if he kept kissing him with so much vigor. He grabbed his neck and pulled him into his body. Loki clung to him and spread his legs, Sam was between him pressing himself into him. "Gabriel."

"Yes. Yes," he whispered between huffed breaths.

Loki straddled him and Sam was captivated by his golden eyes. Loki spoke in a husky voice, " _ When _ we get out of this, I _ am _ claiming you." He rested his forehead against his. "Do you remember I told you something could be on the horizon?" He paused, "That's what I was doing while you were at Bobby’s, I confirmed my suspicions. The Apocalypse has begun."

"Apocalypse? No, that can't be. That's ridiculous. What does this have to do with Dean?"

Loki shifted off him and theorized, "The prophecy says Lucifer will rise and bring an end to this world as we know it. He was cast down from Heaven and sealed into a cage. There are 666 seals, and only 66 need to be broken for him to be free." He hesitated, "The first seal has been broken... When a righteous man sheds blood in Hell. As he breaks, so shall it break."

The hunter was flabbergasted. "Dean?" Rubbing his face, "Were you aware of any of this?"

Gabriel shook his head, "Heaven doesn't just drop down to say ‘Hi’. Or especially to rescue the soul of some hunter. Something bigger than the Apocalypse is happening as well. We are fucked, so fucking fucked, and this is wrong." He jumped to his feet and his hands were pulling at his hair again. "We need to come up with a plan. Quick!"

Sam gripped the couch and followed Loki, Gabriel? With his eyes, "You say that like you're joining a battle."

"I am, for you..." he met his stare. "You won’t deal with this on your own." He let out a long sigh, "This is my family too. For now, I think I should stay in hiding as Loki for as long as I can." Sam stiffened, "Don't worry, I am coming with you. As unhappy as Dean will be in my presence and us, this is an advantage."

Sam brushed his hair back before reaching for his lover’s hand.

"I can put up a shield to hide from the angels but if I feel it slipping, I have to leave if you aren't in immediate danger. If the psychic Pamela was correct in saying it was Castiel that pulled Dean from Hell, I remember him. I've been gone for over two thousand years now, but if it’s the same seraph, he has risen through the ranks in Heaven."

Sam prodded, “What do you remember of him? Is he more powerful than you?”

"Pfft, No. But they must have the support of the Heavenly Host to have yanked a soul from Hell. They're not concerned with repercussions." Sam stared out the windows.

"I can see your gears turning Sammy Boy, and no, I couldn't have saved Dean. Not without waging a war against Hell." Sam relaxed a bit. "Those errands I have been running lately? Well, I have been trying to feel out alliances and eliminate enemies."

"How aware of this possibility were you?"

"It was a precaution, I didn't know for certain. There has always been a prophecy of an Apocalypse, it’s just a matter of when and where really. Since we’re airing our secrets, I killed Ruby a few months ago." Sam was unhappy to hear this, but Gabriel waved his hands nonchalantly, "Before you say anything, she was planning on manipulating you into drinking demon blood to strengthen your powers- Which we’ll need to talk about again."

He nattered on, "The longer I can remain Loki, the better because I can't imagine I will be able to suss out information once folks find out I'm I’ve been lying to them for thousands of years."

"If this Castiel angel doesn't say anything, can't you carry on the way you always have?"

He spun on his heels, "If I thought you would walk away, I woulda' zapped us into a pocket universe and I would be licking honey out of your navel right now. But we both know, you can't.

For some reason Sam felt embarrassed, "You know me so well."

"I do, Toots. Now let's get back to Dean and Bobby before this angel finds them."


	21. Interluding

Bobby was sprinkling crushed bones in the bowl to start the ritual when Sam and Gabriel showed up. "Stop!" Gabriel shouted.

"Jesus boy, you're going to give me a heart attack." Dean and Bobby both looked in their direction. Sam apologized, "Sorry Bobby, didn't mean to scare you."

"No, no. It's fine. Glad you pulled your head outta' your ass."

Dean took a hard stance, "Sam,  _ Trickster." _

"Dean-O, good to see you. Always a pleasure." Sam elbowed him in the ribs, "Anywho, whatever you guys are doing, you gotta' stop."

Dean had natural opposition to him, "Why should I do anything you tell me?"

"Because I trust him and we don't have time to bicker about this," Sam stated.

Dean threw his hands in the air, "Right, like I'm not living on borrowed time again."

Loki stepped in, "No Dean, you're not. You're back, from the DEAD I might add. Be grateful for the time you have. But right now, you are trying to summon the angel that pulled you from hell. Once you do,  _ then _ the clock starts ticking."

"Bullshit!"

"Heyyy, that's what your younger, better looking brother said too. Tick Tock Dean."

Dean suspended his disbelief for a moment, "I want answers and you're giving me more questions!"

Before anyone could respond, the barn began to shake, the light bulbs exploded showering them in sparks, and the barn doors burst open. Gabriel immediately raised his shields, Dean took a few steps forward, and Bobby was close to his side, and Sam took a defensive place in front of Gabriel.

Bobby and Dean both started unloading their shotguns into the angel's chest as he strode towards them. "Stand down boys!" Gabriel shouted, "You're just wasting bullets."

"Who are you?"

"I'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from Perdition."

"Yeah. Thanks for that."

The angel took in the others and dismissed them, "We need to talk Dean. Alone."


	22. Ghost Proofing

Sam and Dean were speeding down the road after finding their fellow hunters dead. Dean put the pedal to the metal after Sam had encountered Hendrickson in the rest stop bathroom. Sam was still upset Gabriel was nowhere to be seen and had no way to contact him, but he closed his eyes and prayed to him. 'Gabriel, if you can hear me- I think Bobby is in trouble, we're finding bodies of hunters and we don't think we can get to Bobby in time. Please, if you can hear me, help him.’

The Impala ripped down the driveway and fought their way through the house to find Bobby and Gabriel in the yard. They had all described the symbols of the ghosts they had run-ins with, Gabriel explained, "It's the Mark of the Witness."

Sam asked, "Witness? Witness of what?"

"Follow me," Bobby said and led them through the house and down the stairs.

"Bobby, what is this?" Dean asked.

"Someplace safe, you idiots. It's solid iron completely coated in salt." He opened the door, "One hundred percent ghost-proof."

Gabriel whistled and Dean laughed, "You're awesome." All four of them shuffled into the panic room. Bobby asked, "Mark of the Witness? That sounds familiar."

"These folks died unnaturally, the symbol you saw? Well, they were forced to rise, and that type of power leaves a mark, hence the name. This is a mile marker, part of the prophecy," Gabriel explained.

"What prophecy?" Dean asked his brother, "What aren't you telling us?"

Dean went to stand and Gabriel stopped him, "Back off bro."

"Don't bro me!"

Gabriel let out a hefty breath, “Okay okay… Well, the bad news is that the Apocalypse has begun.”

"And?"

Gabriel jeered at him, "And what? It's all bad news. Sprained ankles and broken necks are bad."

Dean spun around, "This is why I can't get behind God."

"What are you talking about?" Sam asked.

"If God doesn't exist, fine. Bad crap happens to good people, that's how it is. And no rhyme or reason, just random, horrible, evil. I get it, okay? I can roll with that. But if he is out, what's wrong with him? Where the hell is he while these decent people are getting torn to shreds? How does he live with himself, you know? Why doesn't he help?"

"Found it," Bobby called out. All eyes were on him, "The spell to stop this you idjits. If I translated correctly…"

Gabriel peered over his shoulder, "Looks good, but you need to cast the spell over an open fire."

"We can use the fireplace in the library, but that means leaving this room for the ingredients. Unless…"

"On it." Gabriel disappeared in a flash.

"Uhh, that's bizarre but really handy," Dean said.

Sam lightly punched him in the shoulder, "Good thing he's on our side, yeah?"

"Whatever," Dean went back to making salt rounds.

"Jerk."

"Bitch."

They both chuckled, Sam was happy to have his brother walking among the living again. Gabriel appeared in the room and set down the heavy hex box and other ingredients.

"Phew, it's scary upstairs. The fireplace is going though." They all set about finishing their tasks.

Bobby took the lead, "Cover each other, and aim carefully. Don't run out of ammo until I'm done or they'll shred you. Ready?"

Gabriel squeezed Sam’s hand before he headed upstairs. His adrenaline was pumping and he focused on being alert. They were bombarded with even more ghosts than before, they managed to deflect all of them except the one that stabbed Dean.

Gabriel had been swinging a crowbar, he used Bobby's ingredients rather than conjuring up new ones, and he could have made an open fire appear in the panic room, but he didn't. Gabriel came up behind Sam and spoke softly into his ear, "You needed to do this as a family. How are you holding up?"

He hugged him tightly, "Just barely." Sam was trying not to cry. "I'm so tired Loki."

Dean stumbled into the room holding his stomach, "What did you do to my brother, why is he acting like such a girl?"

Both his eyebrows shot up and his jaw dropped, he let go of Sam, "Excuse me?"

"You heard me, a couple of ghosts shouldn't make him weak in the knees."

Gabriel bared his teeth, "You must have lost a lot of blood if you think that's appropriate."

"This? It's a scratch," he moved his hand and showed his bloody shirt, the skin was frayed and it was deep. "If we are gonna' face an apocalypse, do you really think babying him is the way to go?"

Sam heard a grunt from Dean, Gabriel had been so quick when he punched his brother's wound. "Tell me, Dean, is this what you want your brother to feel? Pain!?"

Bobby heard the commotion, "What in the hell is goin' on in here?" Dean pointed his finger at Loki. "Really Son? Why don't I believe you."

Sam was done, he needed to leave before he crumbled. Giving Bobby a side hug he said, "We're going back home, call us if you hear anything?"

"Sure thing." Bobby reached out and shook Gabriel's hand.

"Toodles."


	23. Floating

Sam washed his face and brushed his teeth. It had only taken two days for the bags under his eyes to return. He couldn't stop those days from looping in his mind.

"Sammy, let's go to bed." He followed him out of the bathroom, and he turned down the bed, shimmying out of his pants. A look of horror came across Gabriel’s face when he noticed the huge bruises forming on his bottom half after being crushed by the desk.

"Shit, I should ice these."

"Lie down," Sam did as he was told, and Gabriel's hand hovered above his legs. Soft gold light emitted from his palm, "This is my grace. It's essentially my soul."

His voice was barely above a whisper, "Y- you healed me with your soul?" He nodded. His eyes were round and full of warmth. "I love you," he said without hesitation.

"I love you too." He leaned down and placed a kiss on his hunter’s temple. He wrapped himself around him, and Sam fell asleep in his arms.

Sam woke the next morning, disoriented. Something wet and warm was attacking his face. His world was blurry, and he swiped whatever it was away. Vincent barked and was wagging his tail. "Lay down." He licked his face once more before lying down and rubbing his wet nose into his arm for more affection. He heard Gabriel's laugh and rolled over to see him. "Does he do this to you too?"

"Sometimes, but I don't stop him. It's like a morning shower."

"Gross…"

His angel leaned in and sniffed his forehead, "We should probably brush his teeth."

Sam got out of bed and washed his face. "You know, I've never seen your bedroom before."

Gabriel stood in the doorway, his arms behind his head, "That's because I don't have one. I sleep in a hammock in the attic."

"What? You have the whole third floor!"

"Yeah, well… That space is Zero-G. I tried sleeping in there, but I kept bouncing off the walls."

"Loki, you're insane," he poked him in the chest.

"Yup! Wanna see?"

Sam started jumping on his bed, "Hold on, I gotta get prepared!"

He laughed, "Rule 1, don't jump up there." He rubbed his head. "Rule 2, no clothes."

"Got it," he stripped off his boxers and shirt, "And got it. Let's go!"

Gabriel deposited his pants in the hallway while chasing Sam. They got to the door, "My lord."

Twisting the knob, it opened to reveal a typical empty room. Sam had one leg through the door when he pushed off with the other. He was weightless! If enjoying a hot tub naked was gratifying, this was well beyond that. He danced in the air. He approached the ceiling and tapped it, and was heading back down. "Gabe! This is amazing!

He had yet to cross into the room when he held his hand up as if speaking into a radio, "The Trickster has landed. That's one small step for a Pagan and one giant cock for my beloved."

Sam laughed, "Try again, angel."

"Ooo, so sassy. I like it. You're so attractive, the gravitational disturbance is causing my galactic center to elongate." Gabriel shook with amusement from his own joke as he bounded towards Sam. Their bodies colliding with a small thud, and they spun mid-air holding each other's forearms.

Sam said, "You know, I've always considered myself to be a pretty grounded person, but apparently I have to make an exception when it comes to you."

"Nice."

Sam's stomach grumbled loud enough for Gabriel to hear. "Sorry, I haven't eaten in… A while," disparaged when he recalled their situation.

"Gravity setting in for you, hun?"

No matter what they were in for, he always made him feel better. He bumped into him, playfully, "Yeah, how do we get out of here?"

Gabriel's head bobbed from side to side, "Well, a little to and fro, just gotta' bounce out. Follow my lead." He was graceful as he tapped between the ceiling and the floor. He clung to the door jamb and lowered himself to the floor. He stepped out with both feet and held his hand out to him. "It can be a little disorienting."

Sam felt his foot being tugged back down, and his weight carried through his body as he crossed the threshold. "Whoa, so weird," stumbling into Gabriel’s warm embrace.

"How about we get dressed and pop over to that crumpet place you like in Seattle. I'm sure Vincent would like to come too."

It was a typical overcast day, not terribly windy or damp. After breakfast, they untied Vincent and walked past the Aquarium finding a clean bench on the dock. Gabriel looked towards the sky, "I don't blame Dean for his behavior."

"You don't?"

He put his hand on his knee, "I have a conception of what Hell can be. Though, who knows what he experienced. Time moves faster there, Sam. Four months is roughly 40 years."

He gasped, "No… He said he didn't remember any of it."

"A human soul isn't designed to withstand that degree of torture. They break, corrode and become the demons you two are so good at ganking."

Sam immediately tensed up, "Wait, you're telling me that demons we kill were once human? That Dean would have turned into the thing that he hates most?"

Gabriel winced, "Eventually, yes."

"What about my Dad? Do you think he was able to withstand it, or do you think he tortured others? Dean couldn't have been the first ‘righteous’ man in Hell... Why was my brother the one to break the seal?"

Gabriel sighed, "That's a lot of questions, Kiddo… Let me explain more about angels since it's my brother wants out of his cage."

"You mean the Devil."

"Lucifer. Our true form can't be perceived with your mortal eyes. Hence, the shattering glass and burning of the eye sockets… We need a vessel in which to take form."

"Like what, a demon?"

"No, we need permission from the host. We can't just pick someone at random like a demon can."

"So you're telling me your body is still someone else's?"

"Hell no, I crafted mine,” he straightened out his jacket.

Sam was quick to retort, "How do you explain your height?"

Gabriel swatted the air. "I am a perfect specimen of the time I created my vessel in."

"Huh? I will save my questions for later. Go on."

"Every angel has a true vessel, in which our power is at its greatest strength in human form. Certain people are more compatible with our grace than others, sometimes it's lies bloodlines, sometimes it's random. I think the Apocalypse is occurring because Lucifer has found his one true vessel."

Sam watched the seagulls coasting in the sky. "Well, isn't that just spiffy? Can't you transport them to the moon or something?"

"No, and it's more complicated than that,” he frowned, "Sam, I think it's you. I think you’re Lucy’s vessel."

Sam was on his feet as quick as someone scared of bees, "Get the fuck out of here, Gabe!"

"I wish I could tell you otherwise, but the abilities you have, the battle royale set up by Azazel, it's more than orchestrated."

"You're trying to tell me this is fate? I died, I got killed by Jake! He won! I'm not his true vessel. He is!"

"He may have killed you, but you're here in the flesh now. I traced your lineage back and…" Gabriel cleared his throat, "You and Dean are descendants of Cain and Abel."

Sam’s young face contorted, "From the bible? Didn't Cain kill Abel? Gabriel, what does this have to do with anything?"

He rose to his feet, "They were real people, siblings. Like you and your brother. As it is in Heaven, so shall it be on Earth." He paused, "If you are Lucifer's vessel, then the potential that Dean is another angel's vessel skyrockets." Sam stared dumbly at him, "Michael, my other brother."

"This is ludacris, incestuous even!"

"I'm giving you all the facts. I’m laying out all the corner pieces. What more do you want?"

He snapped, "I think I have done a pretty damn good job compartmentalizing, but I'm running out of cubbies to stuff all this shit in!"

"Do you think this is easy for me? I left Heaven. I left my Father's side! Do you have any idea how much that hurt? Now, my brother wants to end the world, and I've aligned myself with the two people that will bring upon his death!"

Guilt welled up in Sam because he didn't realize this was as difficult for him as it was for him. "They will stop at nothing to end each other."

"We would never say yes. To either of them."

"This is war, Sammy. We can't put anything past them. You can say you will never say yes, but you don't know my family."

"...But you know mine." Sam’s tattoo began to tingle when he touched his palm to Gabriel’s leg. It wasn't an unusual sensation since he gave it to him, generally, he paid no mind because it always warmed his heart. "Whatever is coming, we will deal with it. Family don't end in blood. Mine or yours. Now, for my abilities, I think it's time I embrace them."

He kissed him, "I love you so damned much."

"I love you too," Sam leaned into him.


	24. Embracing

It was late morning when Loki and Sam arrived at a desolate bar he sniffed out. Sam couldn't tell which state they were in, but the air was dry and there were storm clouds on the horizon. Adjusting his burgundy flannel he was more comfortable for whatever Loki had in store.

"Inside there are two demons, a hooker, and a bartender, badum tss…" Gabriel waved his fingers like drumsticks.

"Not funny Loki."

"I like that you call me by both my names, and Gabe," he quipped.

Sam gave him a side smile, "Well, there are many sides to you dear. So what are we doing here?"

"You are going to kill the demons with your mind." He handed his boyfriend the rosary Bobby had given him for Christmas. 

He didn’t think that was possible, but Gabriel was confident as he pushed him forward with his hand on the small of his back. Being forced inside, Sam wrapped the rosary around his thick knuckles.

Bellowing their entrance Loki shouted,"Hello Heathens!" Instantly the brunette behind the bar and the street walker vanished, leaving the two members of Team Free Will alone with the burley demons.

Their eyes flashed black as they thundered towards them. In a blink of an eye, they were both were strapped to chairs inside a devil's trap.

Sam commented, "Not wasting any time are you?"

Gabriel’s announcer voice resonated throughout the bar as he spoke into a microphone he materialized, "Don't let yourself be distracted by their beauty! Your contestants here have killed countless people, maimed even more, and are here before you for your viewing pleasure!” Pointing to the one of the left, a beam of light angled down to show the demon squirming against his restraints, “This dreamy-eyed demon likes to fornicate with trees and squash midgets.” Another light beamed down to display Loki’s other guest, “While demon number 2 likes to tie up old women and drain their blood! Let’s start with contestant #1!”

The lights flashed in a multitude of colors and Loki had a huge grin on his face that dimmed a tad when Sam glared daggers at him. "Sorry, got a little carried away. Not used to having a partner with a moral compass." 

"Obviously." Sam felt marginally less objectified when the bar returned to its ominous state. He was grateful for the gags as the demons continued to thrash in their seats. 

Gabriel remained quiet as Sam fortified himself with a few death breaths. Rolling his calloused digit over the rosary he was ready to attempt these exorcisms. Concentrating on the demon on the left, he felt it’s malignant energy skirting the barriers of his mind, repulsed by the very nature of it.

"Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus, omnis satanica..." He grasped the evil but immediately released it in shock. The purity of its hatred stinging him. 

Sam grappled with his resolve and looked to Gabriel for support. "Don't be afraid, you're going to free this man." 

His response was confident as it always was and it was all the encouragement he needed. He tugged at the evil this time. "Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus..." The hunter felt the demon draining from its human prisoner as he corralled it. "... _ invocato a nobis sancto et terribili nomine...quem inferi tremunt...Ab insidiis diaboli, libera nos, Domine."  _ Instinctually he knew he had its entirety in his grasp and with one thought he crushed it needing this violation to end.

With the mental strain gone, he had nothing to hold onto and collapsed to the floor. Sam was overcome by a cyclone of emotions. Unable to tell if they were his, or if they were residual wickedness clinging to him, he curled in on himself as the onslaught of hate, pain, and guilt flickered around him… Gabriel pressed his hand on his side, coaxing him with his warm and steady presence, "Come back to me."

He rolled over on the sticky floor, "Gabe?" 

"Yeah, babe. You did it." Sam managed to get on all fours when his stomach lurched, vomit spewing from his mouth, barely missing Gabriel’s shoes. 

He helped him to the closest bar stool, pulling a handkerchief from his pocket before going behind the bar to get water when Sam shouted, "Whiskey!" His vision cleared enough to see demon #2 smiling behind his gag titillated by his discomfort. "What are you looking dick? You're next."

Gabe handed him the glass of whiskey and he downed the shot, setting his glass next to the bottle on the table. "Sammy, I can take care of this one. We can take a break."

He was a bit perplexed by his offer. There was still so much about his counterpart he didn't know yet, "You can? Tell me what it's like when you do it."

"Hmmm." Loki squeezed his chin, "It's like snuffing out a flame. Except I can feel the purification happening through my grace."

Sam downed another shot because his mouth tasted like a dumpster. "Interesting," he said.  _ 'Snuff, not drag' _ . The hunter stood and literally shook himself off stepping directly into the eye line of the demon. This time, he concentrated on the person in front of him glimpsing beyond the vile creature. Picturing him returning to his family, mowing the lawn, pumping gas… Mundane things.

Clutching the rosary as a lifeline, he focused on keeping a veil between the demon and the man in his mind. He envisioned the person as a beach ball and the demon as the air that filled it. He muffled the static the demon was creating and stretched his essence to encompass both of them.

Droplets of sweat fell from his brow as began to compress the demon. If he hadn’t been squinting, he would have witnessed the demon’s eyes bulge. It fought him back, pinballing for an escape, Sam cast another mental canvas to contain it. The pressure was reduced and he continued to compact the ball until its foul center was deflated.

Hesitantly opening his eyes he stumbled back a few steps. "Did I do it?"

Gabriel turned to him, "Sure did, kiddo! You were brilliant!" He hugged him. "I was observing you both times! You did exceptionally well with this one." 

Sam’s excitement diminished when he pointed to the two men slumped in the chairs, "Will they be okay?" 

Loki rubbed his shoulders and the crease between Sam’s eyebrows dissipated. "I’ll set it right and erase their memories."

"Thanks. Your analogy was really helpful, but this… "

"Oh whatever! Just eat those thoughts. I've met numerous humans that can do things they  _ shouldn't _ be able to do. They don't all use them for personal gain."

Sam forced a smile and did one more shot of whiskey. "Okay. Home then?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve updated the chapter count. It turns out I never finished this fic and the rough chapters I had left were crap. Soooo, I re-wrote the outline and it will roughly have 43 chapters and an epilog. Wish me luck, I could use some encouragement. I have six chapters to write, so I will alternate between revisions/new chapters. Thank you to everyone who has left a comment! It's keeping me going.


	25. Relaxing - After 1k of SMUT

The sun was below the horizon, and their house was quiet aside from the clattering of plates as Sam cleaned off the table. His hands were soapy as he washed the dishes in the sink when Gabriel’s arms wrapped across his stomach. His chest pressed into him as he rose to his tiptoes to nuzzle his neck. Sam nearly dropped the plate.

Sam turned around to kiss Loki when he was pushed against the counter. The soapstone was hard against his back, and he lifted himself on the cold surface for the man to take his spot between his knees. Their height difference was staggering, but it gave Gabriel unrestricted access to his chest. He pulled off Sam’s shirt and plunged his teeth into the highest place he could reach, his collarbone. He grazed Sam’s ribs with his fingertips, kissing all of the muscles he could, and gave his full attention to his nipples. He pinched and gently twisted, and Sam had no idea what ecstasy it was to be touched there. 

Sam let out a small yelp when Loki zapped his pants away, and he was bare assed on the cold countertop, but he was distracted by his tongue tracing from his knee to his inner thigh. 

Gabriel leaned over and took his cock in, swirling his most devilish muscle around the tip like the lollipops he loved so much. There was a small thunk as Sam’s head hit the cabinet behind him. Gabriel looked up with Sam’s dick in his mouth, moaning, and he was coming undone as he grasped the Trickster’s sandy hair and came in his hot mouth internally calling all of his lover’s names at once. 

Slow to release Sam from his adoration, he sucked until Sam verged on the side of becoming too sensitive. Gabriel grinning around his cock, the sight of his wet, swollen lips prevented him from going limp.

Loki pushed Sam’s feet onto the countertop so he was spread out. Sucking on his left thigh and then moving to his right, he moved up to lavish his stomach with kisses until his mouth found his hunter’s. Sam loved his tongue gracing any part of his body, but he was surprised by how hot it was to taste himself on Gabriel’s lips.

While Sam was distracted by his lavish attention, he nudged Sam’s legs further apart and lubed up his index finger finding Sam’s anus. Grasping his hard again cock in his left hand, he pushed a finger inside him. Sam cried out at the pleasure. Feeling Gabriel’s hardness pressing against his leg, he urged him, “Get naked Gabe.”

Without stopping his tantalizing touches, Gabriel’s own dick was brushing against his skin. It was electric, and Sam’s tattoo began to hum in delight. He reached down to take his cock in his hand, but Gabriel found his prostate and a current of exhilaration coursed through his body. Another orgasm was approaching when Gabriel added another finger and the pain of the stretch had Sam crumbling once again. He was so hard it hurt, “Stop, stop making me cum!” he cried. 

Gabriel lowered his head to Sam’s cock, and he came so hard Gabriel was thrust back by the force of Sam’s legs clenching together.

Sam gripped the edge of the countertop to keep himself from falling off, his long legs hefting slightly with each deep breath he took. His head lolled to the side, and Gabriel was staring at him happy as a cat. 

Dismounting from his position, he took a few uneasy steps as he pushed Gabriel into a chair. Sam wished he could have looked less clumsy as he fell to his knees in front of him, but was eager to take care of his angel.

Sam leaned in his space and ran his hands up Gabe’s thighs, and his dick sprang to attention. He nibbled along Loki’s tattoo, murmuring, “You’re so perfect.” Licking his lips, he ran his mouth along his shaft.

“I’m so close, Sammy,” he whimpered. 

Sam swallowed as much of his length as he could. He took his bigger hand and wrapped it around his base, jerking him off as he bobbed his head to keep pace. 

Gabriel’s energy couldn’t be contained as he gyrated into Sam’s mouth, and he opened his throat to take more of him. Now that he had found the rhythm, Sam was perfectly balanced with one hand around him and the other massaging his balls.

As he moaned around Gabriel, his body flushed with warmth spiraling from his roses on his shoulders. It was harmony. With a few frantic gestures, Gabriel spilled into his mouth. He took as much as he could, but his load dribbled down his chin. He tasted divine, and he lapped it up before falling on his bum laughing.

The angel looked down from the chair in the kitchen, holding himself as a few of the last tremors ran through him. His face was flushed and he let out a long sigh, his crooked grin lighting up his face, "We're so good at this," he said.

"Hell yeah, we are." Gabriel wiped his brow. "Let's continue this in the shower."

One more orgasm later, and they were both utterly wrecked from bliss to the point that Sam accused Loki of adjusting his refractory period.

He rested against his angel as he brushed wet hair with a pink comb. "Gabe, do you think I will have a vision tonight?"

Answering softly, "I'm not sure about that, love. Do you want one?"

"It's not that I do -or don't… But I had visions in the past since I've opened that door again, I wonder if it's gonna’ happen tonight."

Sam liked the way it felt to have his hair brushed, so tender and loved. Gabriel reassured him, "I can stay on the periphery of your dreams tonight." Barely able to stay awake, he squeezed him in thanks.

"Good. Want me to dry your hair?" There was no answer from Sam as he had just drifted off to sleep, and Gabriel held him like the precious being he was to him.

_ He recognized himself, Dean, and Castiel in a motel, but someone else was there too. Dean asked the question he wanted to know, "Okay, who are you, and why should I care?" _

_ Castiel introduced him, "This is Uriel. He's what you might call a specialist." _

_ Dean questioned, "What kind of a specialist?" Uriel didn't respond. He looked to Castiel, "What are you gonna do?" _

_ " You, both of you, need to leave this town immediately," Castiel said in his monotone voice. _

_ " Why?" _

_ Uriel stood straight, "Because we're about to destroy it." _

_ Sam watched as he and his brother shared a look of horror. Dean was pissed, "This is your plan? You're gonna’ smite the whole town?" _

_ " We're out of time. The witch has to die. The seal must be saved," was Castiel's response. _

_ Sam was astonished, "There are a thousand people here." _

_ Uriel corrected, "One thousand two hundred and fourteen." _

_ "And you're willing to kill them all?" Sam's thought process followed the words he saw coming from his mouth. _

_ " This isn't the first time I've purified a city." _


	26. Delaying

They both woke immediately at the conclusion of Sam’s premonition, and Gabriel was shaking his head. Sam asked, "You saw I take it?" 

How his brothers and sisters have fallen if they determined sending Uriel was a solution. Uriel was a solution of the biblical days, not the 21st century. Since meeting Sam, he had surmised that he would return home one day, sooner than later with the impending Apocalypse, but he was filled with apprehension. This wasn’t the home he wanted to return to. It was too similar to the one he fled.

Sam gently spoke his name, "Gabe?"

"Yeah, it will be fine," he replied thoughtlessly.

The contrast of Sam’s cold palm as it skimmed his back was almost too much. He prodded, "What's up?"

Though the room was dark, the moonlight hovering outside their window provided enough lighting so he could still make out every feature of his hunter’s face. With the link they formed with their tattoos, it was easy to read the kid. He met Sam’s dark eyes with a sigh but stilled when the young one pushed strength and love through their growing bond. 

He was so impressed he almost forgot the question, but Sam’s mind was probing as it always was. Scoffing, “Seeing Uriel caught me off guard. Ya’ know, plus their disposition for smiting."

"Yeah, well, that's not gonna' happen." He shifted in front of Gabriel and began massaging his shoulders.

"Mmm… You're so good to me." He closed his eyes, and Sam kneaded some of his tension away. For crying out loud, he should be comforting him! Unable to fight the soothing touches, he permitted himself to fall deeper into the moment. He was a hedonist, after all.

To him, Sam always smelled like lilacs and the sea. Sweet but crisp with an unidentifiable musk. 

Since the day they had met, his scent had always propelled his senses into overdrive. Even the angelic ones he never needed to temper until that fateful day at the college. Sam continued to work up his spine and into the base of his skull. The concept of resistance was nowhere, and he pinned the Winchester to the bed. 

Sam interrupted him, “Loki?”

"Yea, darling?" He attacked his throat.

"As much as I love this, we- we need to make a plan."

"Now? Let us cum first," he nibbled his collar, then rubbing his nose along his tendon breathing him in.

"No, Loki…” Sam protested, “Apocalypse, remember?"

He mumbled, "That-" into his neck and heaved himself off with a groan. "Can't you at least give me a hand job? It won't take long." He crossed his fingers over his heart.

He saw a smile play on Sam’s lips; he knew how much he loved his playful antics. Hook, line, and sinker! He pulled his pants down and showed him his cock, wearing down his resolve. He traced his finger down Sam’s arm. Everything about him was delectable and he grew harder.

Sam straddled him, "Two minutes." He took him in his hand and rubbed him up and down. He could feel the heat pooling off him.

Reaching down, Sam pulled out his own hard cock from his boxers and gripped both their dicks in his hand as he bounced on his lap. He didn’t think he had a biting kink, but he pulled Sam’s chest to his face and nipped away. He was getting close, and he lubed up his fingers, just pressing them against his backside without entering him. Sam grabbed his dick even harder, and they both came together all over his stomach.

Sam teased, "Okay cowboy, how long was that?"

Gabe held up his pointer finger. He huffed out his answer with his eyes shut, "One minute, fifty-four seconds." He heard Sam laugh, but his mind was still hazy. He snapped his fingers and they were as clean as they were after their shower. He fell back on the cozy mattress.

"Meet me downstairs when you recover. I'll put on the coffee." Sam patted his leg, and he was left alone with his senses and thoughts again.

It was half-past four in the morning as he followed the aroma of the coffee brewing. It was one of his favorite house blends from Bacco Cafe. In the kitchen, he found Sam on a laptop on the island.

He was solely focused on the computer. "Knowing the population is 1,214 is extremely helpful in narrowing down the town. There are only four towns that fit the bill according to the U.S. census," he said.

He poured them both a cup and sat down next to him. "Which one do you think is Samanshine?"

"Not sure. I still have to check out the news of the last two towns." He was content to watch him squint at the computer screen. He was so cute when his nose crinkled, "Dammit. Nothing unusual in the papers." He touched the brim of Sam’s cup, lowering it to the temperature Sam preferred. 

"Thanks," he typed away furiously at the keyboard. He looked at the site he was on, scouring the police records." Mahnomen, Minnesota!" Sam proclaimed.

He turned the screen to Gabriel could see, and he skimmed over the report. "Looks like this guy swallowed and choked on razor blades in Halloween candy? Humph, my night of free candy is ruined..."

Sam rolled eyes, "Halloween is in two days. This must be seal related." He picked up a coffee mug and took a sip, "It's a straight shot from Sioux Falls, shouldn't be more than a couple of hours drive."

He scowled, he didn't want to take a seat on this, but he didn't want to be revealed to his siblings just yet, "Sammy…"

"I know, Gabe. There are ways you can help, though. I need to call Bobby and let ‘im know we have a case."

Gabriel was hesitant, "I have a feeling Dean is gonna’ be suspicious of you getting the jump on this."

Sam closed the laptop, "It's difficult enough now; I can't imagine how he will react when he knows  _ everything _ . I don’t even think he would believe that  _ you _ of all people, is an angel."

Loki scoffed, he probably wouldn’t believe that either, but that was kinda’ the goal these last couple of thousand years. He carried on, "Going into battle, you need to be aware of all of your strengths and weaknesses. You need to trust one another, and that includes me earning his trust too." Typically, he wouldn't give a shit, but they needed to move as a unit.

"I know I’ve overwhelmed you with information in the past, and I refrained from telling you more so you had time to process.” He hypothesized, “Maybe that will work with Dean?"

Sam half-smiled at him, "Nah, he's all or nothing." He waited to realize he had more to tell. Yup! There was that brow crinkle he loved so much.

“Being that we’re knocking out that honesty here, there is one more thing I gotta’ tell you.” He rubbed his palms on his pants, “I don’t know if guys technically have child-rearing years, but I can’t ever have a kid with you. Not just because you’re human, but just cause of what  _ I am,”  _ he emphasized. He was nervous but continued, "It doesn't mean we can't have a family or that you can't give birth- If you wanted that."

Gabe wasn’t expecting his favorite crinkle to return to his hunter’s brow, “You know I love you no matter what, right?” Gabriel nodded, “But- um, guys can’t be the ones to deliver babies.”

“Ha! You can totally carry a baby if you want to when you’re with me, Sambo!” He didn’t understand Sam’s thanks as a response but dismissed it because he thought he had been entirely clear on the subject.

Sam tried to rub the crease away. Loki pushed past, "Phew. You know you are a beacon to me, right? That I plunder forward with you lighting my way? As an angel, I can perceive things others can't. The light of your soul is one of them, its Purity." 

Sam covered his hand to his mouth, and Gabriel heard a disgruntled ‘virtue’ with his exceptional hearing. "No, no,” he disputed. “You have one of the brightest souls I have ever seen, and I want no one to look upon you." He brushed his cheek from his seat. “Ever,” he finished possessively. He swallowed, trying to keep his composure, "But I can see something else too. It doesn’t make up the sum of you, but it is part of you."

"What is it?" Sam asked.

He despised the fact he had to deliver this particular message, "For some reason, you have demon blood in your system."

Sam shifted uncomfortably on his stool. "I know. It was Azazel.” Studying his mug, he asked, “You can see that?"

"Honestly, Sam, I didn't expect you to be so chill about this."

"I'm not- But it is what it is. Can you strip it away?" Gabriel shook his head.

"I was a baby. It's the reason he killed my mom." Sam crossed his arms, "I was so scared after I found out. It's why I didn't want to use those abilities."

" _ Your _ abilities." Gabriel corrected. "Look, Sammy, I keep encouraging you to use them because 'it is what is' as you say. Having demon blood in you doesn't make you innately evil or wrong. It’s just extremely rare. Anyway, who really cares?"

He chuckled as a cover, "You make a good point."

He tugged the hair at the base of Sam’s neck, "Now, you stand up for yourself when you tell Dean."

Ducking his head, he responded, "I will."


	27. Communicating

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is super long but I didn't want to split it in two. I hope you like it!

Sam was relieved to be heading back home, he wasn’t able to kill Samhain, but he was able to send him back to hell. He was packing his bag back when he had an unexpected visitor, Uriel. He looked at expectantly, "Tomorrow, it's an anniversary for you, right?"

Sam was incredibly uncomfortable in his presence. "What are you doing here?"

"It's the day Azazel killed your mother. Then, 22 years later, your girlfriend too. Must be difficult to bear. Yet, you brazenly use the power he gave you. His profane blood pumping through your veins."

His mouth went dry, "Excuse me?"

"You were told not to use your abilities," Uriel said calmly.

Anger welled inside, "What was I supposed to do? That demon would've killed me, and my brother, and everyone!"

"You were told not to.” Narrowing his eyes, “You've been warned twice now."

"You know, my brother was right about you. You are dicks."

Uriel took a step towards Sam, but he didn't back down. "The only reason you're still alive, Sam Winchester is because you've been useful. But the moment that ceases to be true, the second you become more trouble than you're worth, one word, _ one _ ." He smirked at Sam’s discomfort and it sent it and it sent chills down his spine. "And I will turn you to dust."

He turned his back to Lucifer’s vessel, "As for your brother, tell him that maybe he should climb off that high horse of his. Ask Dean what he remembers from hell."

'Who really cares', Sam thought. Obviously heaven! Maybe he shouldn't use his abilities. He felt a tug on the hair behind his ear and turned around to find no one in the back seat.

Despite Gabriel's reassurance, he was in great turmoil. Was Dean pulled from hell with the memories he made? Was he lying because he couldn't admit it himself?

Sam wanted to tune it all out but wasn't able to. Dean must have some burdensome thoughts as well because their drive was silent. No Def Leppard to drone it out. He was positive of one thing, Gabe was waiting for him and  _ that _ made it all bearable.

Boy, has he put all the eggs in one basket. One golden-haired man sized basket, surrounded by empty whipped cream cans. He prayed it would all be okay. He felt another tug on his hair, "Enough!" he shouted. "Can't a man think in peace?"

Dean was confused by the exclamation, "Uhh, did you want to be left alone?"

He laughed, "No, it's not you, it's Loki. I think he's reading my mind."

His brother was visibly startled by that, "What, and you're okay with that?"

"Yeah, it's fine. I think I could block him out if I wanted, but I don't. He's just impatient." He told his brother.

"Creepy." He scratched his chin, "Do you think angels can read minds too?"

This question made him pause, Gabriel was an Archangel, he wasn’t sure. "I don't think so, but if you pray to an angel they will hear you." He sensed his discomfort, "Dean, are you worried someone will pick up on your thoughts from hell?"

"What are you talking about?" He asked.

"It was something Uriel said. He told me to ask you what you remember about hell." He nodded his head, and he saw his jaw muscles tighten. "It's okay Dean, you don't have to talk about it. But if you ever need to get anything out, I'm here."

"I don't," he said gruffly, "But thanks." Dean gripped the steering wheel tighter, “How do you know so much about angels now?”

Sam cleared his throat. “Um, well- There’s some stuff you don’t know.”

“Stuff? What kinda’ stuff?”

Delaying a little bit longer, “I haven't told Bobby yet.”

“Well, you're sure taking your sweet time telling me! Spit it out!”

Rushing it out in a long sentence Sam spoke, “Loki isn’t really a Trickster, he’s actually the Archangel Gabriel and he's been masquerading around as a Pagan God for a few thousand years.”

Dean slammed on the brakes pulling to the side of the road. “What the hell is wrong with you?!”

“What the hell is wrong with me? Where do you want me to start Dean?”

The older Winchester got out of the car and began pacing, “It was bad enough you’re with the Trickster and now you’re going to tell me he’s an angel?” He faced his brother from the opposite side of the car. “Bullshit! I don't buy it. He’s messing with you again.”

“No, Dean. He’s not. You don’t even know him.“

“He kills people, Sam!” Dean kicked a stone in the street, “...I just wanted you to be normal.”

Sam’s anger was rising. This was, and forever would be, a sore spot between them. “No. No, you never wanted me to be normal. I  _ tried _ to be ‘normal’ and all it did was get me kicked out of the family and Jessica dead!”

Dean sneered, “You were running away.”

Smacking his hands on the top of the Impala, he shouted back, “That _IS_ _normal Dean!”_

“Well, shacking up with an angel ain’t.”

“So what, you want me to ditch my boyfriend so we can face the Apocalypse on our own? Or rely on the angels we  _ do  _ know? Because I can tell you one thing, I don’t trust them and you shouldn’t either. I  _ trust  _ Gabriel. I trust Loki.” 

He wouldn’t admit that Sam was right about not trusting the angels because he didn’t either. “You’re talking about him like he’s two different people.” 

“He kinda’ is. But he’s scared too, Dean,” he confided. “He doesn’t want to fight his family, deal with the Apocalyse anymore than we do. But he’ll do it so we have a shot at surviving. Making it through together. He’s the best chance we got and I’m gonna’ marry him.”

Dean let out a long sigh and rubbed his eyebrow. “You’re what now?”

He repeated, “Once this is over, we're gonna’ get married.”

The words finally caught up with Dean, “You can't marry an angel!”

“Yes, I can and I will.” Sam was already tired of this conversation. “You can’t tell me what to do anymore!”

Dean walked around the car so he was out of the road, “You know what Sammy? Maybe I can’t but I can tell you that you’re out of your damned mind if you think this is fine.” He leveled his finger at his younger brother meeting his eyes with his emerald fire. “What else aren’t you telling me?”

Scratching his head, he considered the best way to tell him. He turned his back and looked over his shoulder, “The night I died, the night you sold your soul… The yellow-eyed demon showed me the night he killed mom.” He turned around to face him, “He, um- He was feeding me demon blood and then mom came in the room-” he looked away unable to tell him the rest of what he saw… “I have demon blood in me, Dean.” 

He yelled, “Christ Sammy!” Sam flinched in response to his brother’s untempered anger.

Sam revealed, “It's where my abilities came from. Where all the kids’ came from.” He took a deep breath, “I know. I’ll never ever be normal.” 

It saddened Sam to think that Dean couldn’t even respond to that, but he wasn’t very big on sharing or words. He just asked, “Anything else?”

The thing he really needed to tell Dean was the one thing he didn’t want to share. Dean was going to flip his shit but Loki said they needed to trust one another and hiding things was the opposite of that in Dean’s world. He shuffled the pebbles around his feet. “Gabriel believes that I’m Lucifer’s true vessel and- And that, you’re probably Michael’s…” he trailed off.

Tears were welling up in his older brother’s eyes, “Sam, I’m almost at my wit's end right now.”

“I get it Dean, I do. I’m sorry. I've had more time to process this than you.”

“Ha, like I'm gonna’ be able to process any of this,” Dean sniped back.

Needing his brother to hear him the words, he spoke resolutely, “I would  _ never _ say yes to him.”

“I know you wouldn't.”

“And you can’t either.”

“Never,” Dean vowed.

Dean went to go to the driver’s side door when Sam interrupted him, “There’s more.” His brother showed his teeth and popped his hand on top of baby. “I’m having premonitions again.”

“Dad never wanted this.” Dean confessed, “He told me I might have to put a bullet in you one day.”

Not a surprise John Winchester would say that about his kid, at least  _ this _ kid but it didn’t hurt any less. “Well, Dad’s dead.”

Dean’s anger reeled its ugly head again, “And you died because of this crap!”

“And then you sacrificed yourself, Dean.  **You** were dead too!”

His brother’s shoulders began to shake and Sam grimaced but instead of a sob or a shout, a bubble of laughter erupted from his lips. Sam joined in and they laughed at the absurdity of it all. Commiserating, his older brother said, “Our lives really are a cluster fuck, aren’t they?”

Disbelieving his brother was done Sam asked, “That's it?”

“Yea. You’re my brother. I trust you.” Dean went to open the Impala door but hesitated, “Now, I’m gonna ask you this one more time. And you better tell me the truth! Is. There. Anything. Else. I need to know?”

Sam glanced around, he didn’t think there was anything else. “Uhh, I’m not lactose intolerant anymore?” 

“Seriously?”

“Seriously. Oh, I guess I don’t need to tell you that you can't tell anyone about Loki right? Heaven has no idea who he is or where he's been. It's one of the few advantages we have.”

“That's it?” 

“Um.”

“Don't you ‘Um’ me! Spit it out.”

“Not like you need to know or anything but Loki and I aren’t having sex. Not until we, um, tie the knot.”

Dean threw his arms in the air, “Nope. Get in the car.”

  
  


The inside of the Singer house was warm and awkward silence lingered in the air. Bobby asked from behind his stack of books on his desk, “So you’re just sitting this one out while your boyfriend goes to do his thing?”

Loki had his feet propped up on an ottoman thumbing through the pages of Weekly World News, “Yup.”

The old hunter huffed, “That don’t sit right with me.”

“Tell me Papa bear, why not?” He asked, putting his paper down.

His response was casual, unassuming, “Seems like you wouldn’t risk his life for a seal.”

Loki stood, “You’re right. I wouldn’t.” He ran his fingers over the dusty books in the library, making the years of accumulation disappear, “Sam had a premonition, that he was going to be joined by some angels on this hunt.”

Bobby dismissed the premonition for the bigger question, “Angels you know I take it?”

Loki’s expression was animated, “Bingo.” 

“Now you tell me, how have you managed to run across these angels and piss ‘em off already?”

His eyes narrowed casting a determined stare before bouncing back to his carefree facade, “Because they are… They’re my brothers and I ran away a long time ago and I’m not ready to join them at the Christmas dinner just yet?”

Bobby rose to his feet stammering, “Your brothers? How is that possible?”

He brushed imaginary lint off his green jacket and tried to be cute, “Because my real name is Gabriel and I’m not a Trickster?”

“Don’t try that crap on me. Well, Sam and I always figured you weren’t what you were saying but I gotta say, I’m surprised.” He scoffed, “An angel.” He went to his oak cabinet and pulled out the whiskey nodding to his company.

“Nah, thanks. I’ll whip one up myself”. He had zapped a sex on the beach in an ornate curved glass with a curly straw before Bobby had finished pouring his own.

Shaking his head before taking a sip he murmured, “Gee an angel...” 

“Not just any angel.” He tipped his glass in the gruff man’s direction, and corrected, “An Archangel.” 

Bobby sat on the lip of his desk, “You’re saying you’re the Archangel Gabriel and you’ve just been what, running around handing out just desserts?”

“Yup,” Gabriel replied.

He crossed his arms against his chest, “That don’t seem very angelic.” 

Gabriel stood a little straighter, a little more fierce, “You don’t know my family. Do you know they were going to smite that entire town to kill one witch?  _ One _ witch?” 

“How do you know that?”

“Sam shared his premonition. I can only imagine it turned out to be true. Sooo, I hung back so I wouldn’t be discovered just yet.  _ But _ if Sam did need me, I would be there in a heartbeat.”

“I know you would son. Though, I probably shouldn’t be callin’ you son.”

“You shouldn’t have been calling me it before but I like the sentiment,” he added with a smirk.

“So what should I call you?”

Gabriel shrugged his shoulders, “Loki, Gabriel, whatever as long as you don’t tell anyone.” His eyes glazed for a moment, “Sam’s telling Dean right now.” 

“Oh yeah? How’s that going?”

“Not great, but he doesn’t want me eavesdropping. Spoilsport.” 

“All that stuff I said before about ganking you if you hurt him…”

Gabriel held his hands up, “Clear as glass like the Toronto skyscraper windows.” Bobby didn’t know what the hell he was talking about but they had an understanding.

* * *

As soon as they pulled in the driveway Vincent was barking at them, he picked up the little rascal and let him lick his face a little more than he would normally allow. Gabriel greeted them at the door. Dean actually said 'Hi' before walking past him. He scooped Sam up and gave a hug so tight, he thought he might drop the dog.

"I love you so much. I'm proud of you, both of you." He wasn't sure if Dean could hear, but he suspected.

Sam gazed down into his gold-flecked eyes, "Thank you." Gabriel shut the door behind them and they went for a walk around the house. Their hands swinging to and fro with Vincent at their heels.

"I told Bobby." Sam gave him a questioning look. "He accepted it quickly, which I was grateful for. How’d Dean take it?"

"He's a strategist. We'll keep you hidden as long as necessary."

Little did they know they were being watched by Dean through the curtain as they continued to stroll through the yard. "It's wrong Bobby!" Dean huffed out.

Bobby walked up to the window to see what's got him so worked up to see Sam and Gabriel. "What's wrong with what you see?"

"He's gonna marry him!"

He scratched his chin, "Guess he said yes then." Dean looked horrified that Bobby knew it was on the table. "So what?" He grabbed Dean firmly on the shoulder and pointed his direction back outside. "Tell me what you see."

Dean rolled his eyes, "My brother with a guy with unimaginable power and a kink for killing people."

"No son, use your deductive reasoning skills, look closely. Don't see them as people you know. Observe them as you would if you're on a stakeout."

Dean clenched his teeth, not because of their gender but who they are, "I see two men. They're obviously a couple from their body language." He watched the Trickster tease the taller man, and how he leaned into the shorter man. "He makes him happy…" Dean observed how he was doting on him and swallowed hard. He stepped away, "They're in love."

Bobby was proud of Dean at his verbal affirmation. "Your brother is smart. Our lives are too short to let the good slip by. That man, or whatever you want to call him, loves your brother more than anything."

Dean cocked an eyebrow and raised his eyebrow, "You know then?" Dean asked.

Bobby closed the curtains, "Yea, Loki… Gabriel, told me when you kids were working the case. Sam and I had our doubts, but he didn't care even before he knew what he really is."

"I'm just worried about what's gonna happen when everything goes sideways."

Bobby put his hands in his pockets, "We'll pick up the pieces like we always do."

Sam and Dean entered the house from the back door to the kitchen. They heard Bobby and Dean in the library. Sam leaned against the counter and Gabriel gave a sultry look, reminiscing about the last time they were in the kitchen together.

Sam bubbled over with love for Gabriel. That's when the heart constricted. His body convulsed, and he thought he was dying. Gabriel's tattoo flared to life, hot pain seared through him. He was able to cocoon his body around Sam's before he fainted and fell to his knees clutching as a blinding light erupted from the kitchen.

Dean and Bobby ran towards the kitchen, but couldn't enter. They saw Gabriel cradling him in his arms. He was speaking with his eyes closed, "Father, you have my word. Thank you."

Gabriel looked up for a moment to see the pair staring with their eyes bulging from their sockets. He held Sam closer and had tears running down his cheeks, "It's alright, he'll be fine." Then disappeared leaving Bobby and Dean scratching their heads worrying for Sam. 


	28. Bonding

Sam woke in a bathtub submerged in scalding water and was resting against something even hotter. His seat began shifting beneath him, but he was unable to move. It was just Gabriel’s hand taking his temperature with his hand against his forehead. The sensation of his cold hand felt heavenly, in contrast to his burning skin.

Ice sloshed in the tub at the movement. His mind was in anarchy, his heart rate was rising, and he was on the brink of a full panic attack when Gabriel crooned his name into his ear. "Samuel, don't be alarmed. Your body temperature is dangerously high. We're gotta’ lower it the old fashioned way. Not too much longer, I promise you," he kissed the side of his head.

"Gabe, what's going on?" he managed to stammer out.

He squeezed his waist with his arm and brought him closer to him. "Focus on our roses."

He was still so physically disoriented; if thinking he was in boiling water was any sort of indication, his mind was anarchy as well. It took a great deal of effort to figure out where his body began, and Gabriel’s ended. When he pinpointed his roses, absolute love coursed through his being. His body soared as it rode the wave. There were so many other emotions too. It was as if a stream was running alongside the love that he could sense but couldn't decipher.

Gabriel informed him in an apologetic tone, “Dad initiated our bonding. We’re almost ready to complete the binding to one another.” 

Finally, interpreting the cacophony of emotions flittering alongside the river of love was anxiety, hope, guilt, and pain. But joy trumped them all. He let Gabriel’s emotions saturate him.

His angel emphasized, “What you’re experiencing, the emotional aspect, is just a small sample of what you will experience after we’re bonded.” He paused, “I’m so sorry you’re suffering right now.” Sam pushed his feet against the foot of the tub, so he was closer to Gabe. 

“It’s you. I can feel you,” Sam objected. “I want this. I want you. I want to complete our bond.” He drove his feelings of devotion and adoration through their flower pedals. 

Gabriel did not want to dismay his human, but he needed Sam to be 110% confident. “Sammy, we can still stop it. Just say the word, and we can stop this.”

“No. We’re meant to be together.” He pawed Gabriel. “I love you.”

As his body fizzled with pleasure, his need for his angel was overpowering him. Gabriel had relaxed behind him at his admission, and he rubbed against Sam from his neck to his knees. His hands roaming over his hunter frantically.

Sam scooted his backside up his torso and could feel Gabe’s cock resting in the nook of his cheeks. Heat flared within him, aroused beyond measure. He retreated further into the water, gliding his ass against Gabriel’s dick. 

The angel bit his neck from behind, holding Sam’s hip with one hand and his own cock with his other. Sam arched his back against him, and Gabriel guided him down his shaft. Every inch was ecstasy. He was so thick, and Sam was sure he was only prepared to take him thanks to his Trickster.

The dual sensation of being connected spiritually and physically was blinding. They moved together as one; Sam’s soul and Gabriel’s grace swirled together as they were becoming whole.

Their building orgasm was unstoppable, like a derailed freight train speeding through their world. They crashed into oblivion. Gabe’s member pulsing within him, and he trembled each time, clenching around his mate.

Sam felt like he may have lost consciousness, but he was firmly anchored to Gabriel. He tried to move but fell back into him, "Mmm, I've got you." The next moment they were in their bed in the same position. Gabriel gently rolled them to their side and separated himself so he could drape over Sam’s broad torso. 

Gazing into his mate’s golden eyes, he felt connected to him on an unfathomable level. It was as if he could feel Gabriel’s heartbeat as his. His love reflected back at himself. He pressed his hand into his warm cheek murmuring to him, "Yours."

"Mine," the angel responded in kind.

Sam caressed his lips with his tongue, "Yours."

Before their lips collided again, Gabriel teased, "Ah ah ah, not so fast..." Sam’s body was flooded with Gabriel’s commitment and desire, Sam had tears forming in the corners of his eyes. It was so beautiful. Shifting to lay on top of Sam, Gabriel kissed him fiercely and moaned into his mouth.

The taller man parted his legs as Gabriel poised himself at his entrance. He ran his hands down his chest and placed them on his hips. Sam shivered beneath his touch. Undoubtedly, he would have felt nervous about his unwavering gaze as he slowly entered him, but the thrum of his emotions quelled any self-doubt.

As much as they both wanted it to last, another orgasm approached quickly and took them both. Defeated by exhaustion, Gabriel swaddled his precious mate in his wings as they laid in another’s embrace. All coherent thoughts drowned out by bliss.


	29. Gabe POV

The rising sun filtered through the light curtains in their bedroom. Gabriel pressed his lips to his human’s temple and stroked his chest, wanting to wake him slowly. Sam had slept nestled in his left wings the entire evening as Gabriel kept then cocooned. When he had tucked them in, he had been captivated by his own wings after ignoring them for thousands of years. His Father must have used a little spic n’ span magic on them. He prayed to his Father, thanking him for everything he had done for them. 

Sensing Sam was near consciousness, he sent him the equivalent of a raspberry through their bond. Sam’s eyes sprung open, and they darted over Gabriel’s mammoth wings. He extended his right three wings in the air, the tips almost reaching the corner of the room.

"You really do have wings..." he slurred in his post wake up voice.

Gabe chuckled and rustled them for him before brushing some hair out of his face. "Yes, I do." 

Sam was slack-jawed as he took in his wings. Gabriel could feel him stammering for the words internally, and he caught “sheer” and “awesome,” which tapped down some of his own self-doubts. Sam reached to touch the bridge branching off his shoulder. 

He purred at his ministrations, his chest puffing up a bit, and he realized he was no longer in control of his body. Though he was a small man, his wings were not. He inspected the color along with Sam. They shimmed at his touch like the golden ink weaved into their tattoos. 

Gabriel watched his mate’s delight when he realized he was laying on his other wings. Sam plunged his hands into the feathers and caressed them with his fingertips. Gabriel moaned loudly and pulled Sam on top of him. The sensation was too much. He growled, "You're the only one to have ever touched me like this."

His mate was already mastering communication through their bond, and he was impressed, as always, by Sam Winchester. He had pushed his love to Gabriel, "I’m honored to be that person." Sam deftly shifted off him asked, "Will I always see them now?” He cracked a smile, ”How do you even wear clothes?"

Gabriel sat up and rolled his shoulders, shaking the wings Sam had slept on before tucking them back. His lowest set of wings nearly touched the floor and the arches from his back were about a head higher than his own. Leaning forward, he bopped Sam’s nose. "Cheeky monkey, you." He waggled his eyebrows, “I don't plan on wearing any clothes for a while, do you?"

Sam laughed earnestly, "No."

"Good because my wings aren't going anywhere anytime soon. It must be our... Mating ritual. We, uhh- Our wings are a sign of our status, and apparently... A signal to others."

Sam chastised him, "Oh, and I'm the monkey? You're a gorilla!"

He pulled his hunter closer. "Your Archangel. Let's be accurate, Samanshine."

Pushing him to the mattress, he claimed him until the sun was pouring through the windows. Gabriel heaved off him, "You need sustenance if we're going to keep this up! Meet me in the kitchen. I’ll start cooking." He kissed him before zapping himself downstairs because he knew he couldn't climb out of bed and walk away from Sam.

He had put on something cute for Sam instead of cooking in the buff. When Sam rounded the corner and saw him, his eyes were wide, and he stifled his laughter with his knuckles.

"To your liking, my Lord?" Gabriel twirled, and the pink frill swirled around him. His modesty is barely concealed in the skimpy sheer nightgown.

"That's mine!" Sam exclaimed.

Gabriel shrugged, "Finders keepers. You never wore it."

He walked up to him and touched his chest above the fushia fur neckline. "Now  _ you _ look good in pink."

"Damn right, I do. Plus, it doesn't irritate the wings." He went back to minding the eggs. Sam sat down and was served breakfast. He kept eyeing him, picking up his thoughts, and it made him blush. 'Magnificent' 'A golden eagle' Oh, and he hasn't even seen him spread his wings fully yet. He was going to make him bow before him. Yikes, that's not what he wants. Sam is  _ his _ god. Let's go with 'cream his panties.’

The fork slipped from his fingers, "Cream my panties?"

'Shit.' Gabriel thought.

'Two-way street, I suppose,' he sang back to him. 'Make it rain suga.’’

He just smirked at him. "Maybe after you're fed. I know this is going to be an adjustment period for us, maybe more for me..." He was pouring his favorite blend, "You know, I was always impressed by you, that you could even shield against me before."

Sensing his surprise, Gabriel continued, "If it's any consolation, I would only get fragments like 'nice butt' 'golden-haired man.’ You did great, by the way. We will need to build on that. Angels are peepers." Sam’s mouth was open a bit, "Oh, don't give me that look. Wouldn't you?"

Sam’s laugh made his world go round. "Keep eating. You're going to need your strength." He came up next to him and snagged a bite of his bacon, winking. 

Gabriel leaned against the counter, eating the last of his eggs. Their kitchen wasn’t large enough for him to sit and not have his wings fan against the floor. "Our Father blessed our matrimony. And I'm sure we are the first full bonding of a human to an angel.” He made his plate vanish. “Sam, he did this with purpose in mind too.”

Sam looked at him. He nagged, “Keep eating.” Relieved that he did, he continued, “He wants us to stop the Apocalypse, steer heaven back to its original course." He paused, “And save my brothers. Specifically, Lucifer.”

Finishing his toast, "What, are you saying that our union can do all those things?”

He chewed his thumb, "It’s going to take a tremendous amount of work to do any  _ one _ of those things, but if we can stop Lucifer from rising, he and my brothers won’t kill each other, and then we can work on setting things straight upstairs.” Adding more seriously, “And save humanity.”

Sam mused, “Why doesn't he help? Why did he only give you a message?”

He shrugged, not wanting to go there. “Pops hasn’t done more than give messages in a long time, and he hasn’t given me one since time immemorial.” He sauntered over to his hunter, placing his hand on his shoulder, “It’s up to us, Samanshine. We just need to tackle one colossal task at a time.”

Sam gave him a tight-lipped smile and kissed his hand on his shoulder. Gabriel asked, “More coffee, love?” Sam patted his hand and said yea’.

Gabriel wanted to sit but decided against it again and leaned on the soapstone with his hot coffee between his palms. He said reverently, “My grace is entwined with your soul and your soul with my grace.”

Sam blushed with his husband’s adoration. Gabe watched that crinkle he loved so much when Sam suggested, "Are you saying, your grace is like a deflector for Lucifer?"

"Not entirely, but in a sense, yes. With permission, he could still use you as a vessel. However, he would still have to battle me. We are one; body and soul, baby."

Sam sipped his beverage, "Would he really challenge you?"

"We aren't going to give him a chance. I imagine he is going to do everything in his power to try to coerce you. He doesn't give a lick about your soul, but I sure as hell do.” Gabe clicked his tongue, “ And I expect repercussions from all sides.”

He discerned Sam’s distress and reassured him through the bond, "You can draw strength from me anytime you need." Feeling a surge of confidence from his lover, he praised him, "You're a natural! Now, let's have sex!"

They rang Bobby and Dean late in the morning. Both of them were relieved to hear his voice. Dean pulled the phone from Bobby, "You sure you're good?"

"I'm fine. Better than." Sam went on to tell him how God had initiated their bonding and that they are angel married now. Dean didn't respond. "You still there?"

His voice was raspy, "Good for you." Gabriel determined at that moment, it was his place to throw a some-what traditional human wedding. If not for Sam, but Dean.

Sam heard no contest from Dean about their nuptials. Actually, he didn't make any comments. Instead, he filled his in on a potential case where people weren't dying when they should. 

"Loki, I have a question. Am I still mortal?" He was surprised by the question.

He closed the few steps separating them and took his hands, and answered him as honestly as he could, "We are eternal. Where you go, so does my nation." His eyes shone like the sun, encompassing him in his glory and light.

"That's as good of an answer as I need." Their lips met, and he poured himself into the kiss.


	30. Fixing

They took Vincent with them to Bobby's. "Sounds like you have a Reaper that went on vacation and didn't tell anyone," Gabriel said. "I shouldn't make jokes. This is bad."

"How bad"? Bobby asked.

"Reapers take their positions very seriously. They are angels that serve Death. Without them, souls can't cross the veil into heaven. Someone powerful has either had to kidnap or kill the Reaper in that territory."

Sam thought they knew a lot about the supernatural world; it turns out to be a drop in a bucket. He was practically useless. 'Tsk tsk Samanshine, you're brilliant!' He heard in his head.

'You can talk to me?' he mentally voiced.

'Oh, we can do a lot more than that,' he felt a twinge in his nether region.

'Loki!' he cried, and mirth filled the bond. He rolled his eyes and returned to the conversation.

Gabriel continued, "I can pierce the veil and find out what happened, but I will be discovered." He frowned.

Dean asked, "Can you take one of us with you?"

Gabriel was perplexed, "Why would you want to go?"

"We shouldn't separate. If you are going to make your… Debut, you shouldn't do it alone. I don't trust those angel dicks."

Gabriel cleared his throat. "Present company excluded," Dean added. Gabe's whole face lit up, and Sam was pretty sure Gabe was preening on his tiptoes.

"Well, I could take one of you with me, but it would be best if we had a clairvoyant who put you under, that brought you back too. You will need someone to watch over your form while you are in transition."

Bobby offered, "I can call Pamela, but I don't think she will be willing to help. You know…"

"After Castiel burned his eyes out?" Sam finished.

Loki devised, "Bobby, call her and tell her to come over. If she's willing to help, great. If not, have her come anyway. I will restore her sight. Preferably after she helps us. It takes a bit of juice to undo a brother's sloppy work."

Hearing this made all of them extremely happy. Dean was pissed Castiel didn't do it earlier. Gabe looked over to him, "I'm an archangel and awesome!"

This seemed to satisfy Dean. "Thanks."

They picked up Pamela on the way to Iowa since Dean insisted he would be the other one to cross the veil. Bobby stayed at home base with Vincent. Five was a crowd. They made quick progress. Gabriel was persistent and worked the little ghost over with ease to get information. 

With quite a bit of effort and a mental boost from Gabe, Dean could scratch out the angel warding so they could enter the building. Finding the demon Alastair with his two Reaper hostages, they reacted quickly and got the jump on Alistair.

Gabriel was about to smite him when Uriel stopped him. His voice boomed in the space, "Gabriel, is it really you?"

"I’ll be with you in a sec." He called out, not even turning his back to face him.

"No. Castiel, take Alastair as our prisoner."

"But-" Castiel was interrupted.

"Now," Uriel commanded. Gabe spun on his heels to regard his brothers when Castiel and Alistair disappeared, leaving the Reapers and Dean as a witness to their conversation. "Brother, where have you been? Heaven has mourned you."

Gabe shuffled his feet, "Oh, you know, here and there. I was going to rid our realm of that shithead, Uriel. Why do you want him anyway?"

Uriel assessed him and dismissed his comments about Alastair, "You seem different. More… Tainted."

"Geez, thanks. And here I thought I was glowing."

Uriel pleaded, "You must return to heaven."

"Nah." Gabriel was so cavalier, it set Dean on edge. "I'm right where Father wants me. Stopping the Apocalypse. That's what you want too, right?"

"Of course." Uriel dipped his head to show respect. "You have spoken to Father?"

"Yes. Briefly."

Uriel confronted him, "And you are standing on the side of the Winchester's versus your brethren?"

"Come on, Uriel, don't you want to route for the underdog? They're good stock. Place your bets."

Uriel's voice was a warning, "This is serious."

"Oh, I know," Gabriel sneered. "Do you think I would be here if it weren't  _ literally _ humanity's ass on the line? Speak the horde, tell them the Apocalypse WILL NOT happen."

Dean was whispering to Tessa. She warned him, "I'm pretty sure deep down you know something nasty is coming down the road. There's no such thing as miracles. Why do you think an Archangel would run in the first place? He was one of the good ones..."

Before he could respond, he heard Gabriel shout his name, "Dean, We're leaving!"

He turned back to his Reaper companion,

"Goodbye, Tessa."

Dean woke in the motel room to see Sam close to him with his hand on his ribs. He looked at him expectantly.

"We had some company. I took care of it, it's fine. Do you have any ibuprofen?" Sam replied.

Gabriel panted, "It's not  _ fine. _ " He walked briskly to Sam and healed him.

"Hey, you got any healing energy left for me?" Pamela quipped. He shot Sam a look of disapproval, but it wasn't his fault.

He turned to Pamela, "Of course I do." Placing both hands on the top of her head, he let his grace flowed from him into his. Sam could feel how his power surging as he began stitching her eyes together, weaving in and out. Despite being annoyed with how he just bossed him about, he glanced at Gabe and saw nothing but compassion while mending their new friend.

Her eyes opened in astonishment, and asked him, "What are you?"

"I’m Sam's husband." He moved away, "Now, I'm done with traveling. Can I just send us back where we all belong?" No one responded, so Gabriel snapped his fingers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh, two chapters in one night! Hope you liked it. Feel free to leave me a comment too, it's like my steak sandwich of writing <3


	31. Smiting

Too many seals were breaking, and they still had no recourse. Gabriel wasn't surprised when Uriel and Castiel asked Dean to torture Alastair. No one but Uriel seemed pleased with the idea. Yet, somehow Dean ended up inside the devil's trap with him as the others listened to the demon’s screams on the other side of the door.

When the silence stretched on for too long, Castiel discovered why. Alastair was free from his restraints and was strangling Dean with one hand. Castiel stabbed Alastair with the demon-killing knife, and Dean fell to the floor like a raggedy doll. 

The knife did nothing to discourage Alastair, and he used it to his advantage to impale Cas on a hook on a post. Alastair began his exorcism to flush Castiel out of his vessel when Sam and Gabriel ran into the room to see it in chaos. 

Blinded by the anger of seeing his older brother crumpled on the floor, Sam flung the disgusting demon across the room. Tossing him against the wall, he held him there with his abilities. 

The vile presence is so much more vivid since his bonding with his angel. It was as if he could sense every molecule of his being. Feeling Alastair flittering beneath his mental grasp, he squeezed him tighter with every question he asked, gaining the information they sought without much resistance, and within moments they knew what the demon did. 

Alastair’s nasally voice is as repulsive as his existence, but he struggled to speak, "Go ahead, send me back… If you can."

Sam stood confident. "I'm stronger than that. Now, I'm going to kill you." Genuine fear flashed across his face. Sam closed his eyes and drained him like dirty bathwater. Alastair didn’t scream. Instead, he grunted and groaned as his chest glowed and burnt out, collapsing to the concrete floor.

Cas was disorientated when Gabriel helped him up. He was horrified that Sam could snuff out a demon of his caliber but was even more in awe that his brother had returned and spoke that very sentiment, “So it is true. You have returned.”

Gabriel was unable to respond because his husband pleaded while cradling Dean, “Fix him.”

Tired of cleaning up his brother’s messes already, Gabriel pushed Castiel in their direction. When Cas furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, he scolded, "Make it right." 

Castiel leaned in and touched his fingers to Dean's forehead. His eyelids cracked open, and Castiel stared into his green eyes with empathy and sorrow. Peering over the other angel’s shoulder, Gabriel gave Dean the once-over, but it was Sam’s relief that ensured Cas had done what he had been instructed. 

Speaking to Dean and Sam, Gabriel said, “I’ll meet you at Bobby's," and then the Winchester siblings were gone, leaving Gabriel with the younger seraph.

Gabriel stood straight, expecting an explanation from the slumped shouldered angel. "I don't know what happened. That trap - it shouldn't have broken. I am sorry."

"Then you understand that the demons aren't doing the killing," Gabriel reasoned in a monotone voice. He spoke his name when he did not reply. "Castiel?"

"Yes. I'm considering disobedience."

Gabriel sighed, "It isn't disobedience if it's God's will." He put his hands in his pockets, "Choosing your own course of action is confusing, terrifying."

Castiel’s large blue eyes were imploring, "I don't know what to do. Please tell me what to do."

"No, it's time to think for yourself.” Clicking his tongue, he added, “Watch your back." Gabriel disappeared to rejoin his family. He wasn't back at base long before he had a niggling sensation that he should check on Cas. When he discovered him on Earth, he cloaked himself in a combination of his Pagan and Angelic magics.

Witnessing the confrontation between Cas and Uriel, he had to try with all of his effort to keep his wings from bursting free. The veil had been lifted on a faction of his brethren. Uriel and his cohort had killed their own in succession to start the Apocalypse. It was unthinkable!

As much as Gabriel was ready to end Uriel's existence, he needed to know where Castiel's loyalties lie. Their conversation turned violent, and pride flared for the little fella' for taking the first strike against Uriel. Cas had put up a good fight but ended on his knees, he was no match for Uriel. Gabriel was merry; Castiel  _ is _ a Champion for the Lord.

The raven-haired angel rasped out, "I still serve God."

Uriel retorted, "You haven't even met the man." Between his words, he delivered powerful blows to Castiel's face, "This is no will. No wrath. No God."

Gabriel positioned himself behind Uriel, and his reserve to contain his grace failed. All six of the archangel’s wings were unleashed in their glory of a full and worthy smiting. He plunged his angel blade through Uriel’s neck, "There is a God, and I am his messenger."

The room filled with white light as Uriel's grace combusted. Gabriel wiped the blade clean, upset at the entire situation. He commanded, "See to your charge."

Castiel gave the proverbial knock on the warding of Singer’s residence for Gabriel to let him in. He appeared in Dean’s bedroom. The older hunter was shaken by his presence, "Cas!"

He narrowed his eyes, "What?"

Dean was terse, "That's all you can say? How about knockin' next time!"

"Dean, you look upset. Are you alright?"

He crossed his arms, "No, thanks to you."

Castiel responded, "You need to be more careful."

Dean gritted his teeth, "You need to learn how to manage a damn devil's trap!"

"That's not what I mean. Uriel is dead."

Dean asked, "Was it the demons?"

Castiel sat on the edge of his bed, "It was disobedience. He was working against us."

Dean sat on the far side of the mattress; he had been struggling the whole afternoon. He held his head in his hands, "Is it true? Did I break the first seal? Did I start all this?"

Cas turned to try to face him. He leaned, placing his hand in the center of the bed. "Yes. When we discovered Lilith's plan for you, we laid siege to hell, and we fought our way to get to you before you-"

He spoke into the floor, "Jump-started the apocalypse?" His body trembled as he inhaled sharply, trying to hold his sobs down. "Why didn't you just leave me there?"

He felt Castiel get up and then slid towards the man as he sat directly next to him. "It’s not blame that falls on you, Dean. It’s fate. They don't tell me much.” He sucked in a breath, “I know our fate rests with you."

"No, it doesn't. I will do what I need to do, but Gabriel has the answers. I don't."

"Ok… What does Gabriel plan to do?"

Dean complained, "He does whatever he wants."

"He will turn the tide of this war. But 'The righteous man who begins it is the only one who can finish it.' " He paused, "You have to stop it."

Dean lifted his head, "Lucifer? The apocalypse? What does that mean?" He looked him square in the face, only inches apart, "Hey. What does that mean?"

Castiel stood, "I don't know."

"Bull."

" _ I don't know _ . Where has Gabriel been? What has he been doing?"

Dean knew more about angels now, so he tried his best to keep him out, 'La la la la' "You'll have to ask him."

"Dean, hiding things from me is futile."

"And not telling me I broke the first seal isn't hiding things from me?" He was pissed again. "Get your own answers. I'm not saying nothing'."

"It wasn't necessary to tell you."

“Well, then you guys are screwed. I can't do it, Cas. It's too big. Alastair was right. I'm not all here. I'm not strong enough. Find someone else. It's not me."

Castiel placed a hand on his shoulder. "I believe in you."

With no response from Dean, Castiel said, "Very well then. I'll be in touch." Cas disappeared.


	32. Planning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, fudge. I accidentally deleted this chapter like a hoser. Here it is, again.

Dean walked into the kitchen to see Gabe making tea for Sam and Bobby. "Do we have a plan yet?"

Gabriel spoke first, "I have an idea that may stop the Apocalypse, but it's a shot in the dark. The most likely outcome is the most unsavory." Gabriel cringed. They looked at him expectantly. He elaborated, "If all 66 seals break and Lucifer rises, there is a way to lock him back in his cage. To do that, we'll need the four horsemen's rings."

"You mean Pestilence, War, Famine, and Death?" Bobby asked disbelievingly. "You think that's the most likely outcome?" Gabe nodded. "What is your other idea?"

He squinted, "If there was one specific seal that needed to be broken to start the Apocalypse, then-"

The blood rushed to Dean's cheeks, "-Then there is probably a seal that needs to be broken last."

Gabriel sipped his tea, "The final seal. There would only be a handful of people that might have that information."

Dean grumbled, "And Alastair is dead now." He turned a sore eye to Sam, unhappy with his brother for killing the demon.

"I suspect you're right. The others would be the scribe of God and Dear old Dad himself. So while I look into Plan C to see if it's even viable." Gabriel's lip curled up as went on, "The horsemen won't rear their ugly old mugs until the Apocalypse begins, but we should start on research. Oh yeah, we should also keep our eye out for the Anti-Christ."

"Gee, this just keeps getting better and better," Bobby remarked."Anything else?"

Gabriel sensed Sam's trepidation bubbling to the surface, but he didn't know which of all of this it was concerning. Sam began to explain to Bobby about angels and vessels and the punchline to the Apocalypse.

Bobby asked the million-dollar question, "Do we know who Lucifer's vessel is?"

Before Gabriel could answer, Sam's hand slowly raised in the air. It was one thing to talk about it with Gabe, but now that it was out there, he couldn't find the words.

The gruff man shouted, "WHAT?"

Bobby pointed his finger at Gabe, "You better be sure as eggs before letting him think that."

Gabriel nodded, "It's true, but he needs permission," he reminded them.

"Which you aren't going to give," Dean reiterated. Sam sighed a 'duh.' He spoke to Gabriel, "Why him?"

"It's not just him, Dean. I believe you're Michael's vessel of my brother Michael." Dean had already heard this from Sam, but hearing this from Gabriel opened up that wound again.

Gabe huffed out a breath explaining to Dean and Bobby, " It's part of your lineage. You two are descendants of Cain and Abel. Part of the prophecy says that Michael will fight Lucifer and kill him. Can you think of anyone more fitting than you two?"

Dean punched a hole in the wall and saw how upset Bobby was. "Sorry Bobby, Gabe will fix it."

This assumption made Gabe chuckle. When Bobby glanced at Gabe, the wall was in its original shape.

The archangel continued, "I've said this to Sam, but I will repeat this. There will be repercussions to our marriage. We can mask the bond for short periods, but it will be harder to do that if we are well, pre-occupied, or something. We need to keep your alliances tight, but it's only the four of us in this room that can be trusted."

Sam needed to ask, "What about the other angels?"

"Uhh," Gabriel ran a hand through his hair. "No. They could very well be stopping some of the seals on their end, but that could be for appearances. The fact is we don't know who we can trust."

Dean recalled his conversation with Cas and nodded.

Gabriel supplied, "With all their knowledge and resources, they should have been able to squelch this from the beginning. Michael or Raphael could have rescued you as soon as they suspected. But- They didn't."

Bobby jumped back in the conversation, "Are you saying they let Dean break the seal on purpose?"

Gabe leaned on the counter and put his hands on his hips. "Without walking through the pearly gates, I don't know what it's like up there. There is turmoil up there for sure, though."

Dean asked, "What about Cas?"

"I think we can. What do you think, Dean-O? Do you trust him?"

He only hesitated for a moment, "I- I think I do."

Gabe clapped his hands together once, "Ok then. He follows orders, so keep on guard, but you Winchesters seem to have good instincts."

Dean gave Gabe a questioning look, "I didn't trust you."

Gabe responded with a question, "And now?"

Dean smiled, grabbing an orange off the table, and walked away, tossing it up in the air.


	33. Dreaming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Dean work at Sandover Bridge Iron Company -- 4.17 It's a Terrible Life

**Day 1**

Sam's alarm clock went off at 6 A.M. He was up and out of bed in minutes. Already showered from the night before, he slipped on his uniform, prepared to start his new job at Sandover Bridge Iron Company. Pouring himself a cup of coffee, he packed his lunch.

His hands began to tremble, and panic overwhelmed him. He tried to banish it by telling himself this was nothing to worry about, new job jitters, but the knots in his stomach were still there when he arrived in the building.

Once settled into his cubicle, a small disheveled man came over. "You're Sam, right?" He nodded. "Hi, I'm Ian. If you need anything, I'm just kitty-corner from you," pointing over his shoulder.

"Thanks. So is this mostly, 'Have you tried turning it off and on?' Or more data recovery and resolving host problems?"

He laughed, "50/50 split with the occasional running up to discover it's not even plugged in."

Sam half-smiled at him, "Standard work then. Well, I better get to it. It was nice meeting you." He told himself, 'See, nothing to get worked up over. Maybe your coffee was too strong.'

The rest of his day went smooth as it could, and he packed up at five and went home. The panic had subsided a bit but was growing into fear the longer he sat on his couch. He put on his running shoes and bolted out the door. Sam sprinted as far as he could before he had labored breath and a splint in his side. He plopped down on a bench at the roadside, feeling marginally better but uneasy about being uneasy. After taking a few moments to catch his breath, he ran back home, ate a bunch of carbs, and hoped sleep would take him quickly.

**Day 2**

His eyes were open even before his alarm went off. His muscles were tight, he was so tired, and nausea made it worse.

He didn't recall even being asleep long enough to be able to dream, but when he tried to rest a few more minutes, he pictured the man he saw when he slept.

His golden eyes were so captivating, but he couldn't recall any of his other features. He was mouthing something to him, but he didn't know what he was trying to say. He wanted to go back to the dream but couldn't. Instead, he got up and prepared for his second day at work.

He slung his messenger bag over his shoulder, having to hoist it up as he trotted to catch the elevator. He almost bumped into the person next to him after pressing the button for his floor.

"Sorry." he turned to look at him, and his stomach fluttered. His green eyes met his, and he soaked in the details of his face. He was doing the same. It was uncanny how familiar he was.

"It's fine." He stammered. "Are you late?"

"No, it's my second day, and I wanted a few extra minutes to collect my thoughts."

"Hm. Today is my second day too. If you get up earlier tomorrow, there is a cafe on the corner of 5th with shots of wheatgrass. It’s great for focus."

"Thanks." He stepped out and found his way to his desk. Sam wasn’t able to have a few moments of peace before Ian spotted him. He handed Sam a bottle of Mountain Dew code red.

"What's this?" Sam asked.

"You look like you need to pick me up. Long night? Do you game?"

He accepted it, "No, I went for a late-night run. Didn't sleep too well."

"Well, hopefully, this helps, and if you want something to help you sleep, I know a guy that can get you anything you want. Uppers, downers, organics, whatever."

He feigned a laugh, "Thanks, but I'm good." They chatted a bit. He liked him but knew he needed to keep his distance while he got the lay of the land in the office.

The job didn't take much effort, and he was grateful because he felt awful. The gold eyes from his dream haunted him all day. They granted him a measure of relief from the anxiety, but he couldn't shake the distress he was experiencing. At one point, he thought he heard someone whispering to him, but when he looked over his shoulder, no one was there.

Sam decided that self-medicating was the best option and stopped by the liquor store on his way home. He had drunk half the bottle when heat ripped through his rose tattoo on his shoulder. He clutched his arm, thinking he had a heart attack.

He considered calling an ambulance before the man from his dream appeared in his mind, 'I will find you.’ Suddenly, the heat and vision he had of him were gone.

Too drunk to drive, he pulled out his medkit and took his blood pressure, 120/80. That's totally normal. Was this schizophrenia? He didn’t care anymore, just wanting the day to be over. Taking a few more shots of whiskey, he passed out on the couch.

**Day 3**

Six AM came earlier than the day before. He practically rolled off the couch when his alarm went off. For some reason, he thought he was in a motel room and was surprised to find himself in his own living room. Sam managed to shower away the stale odor of booze before leaving for work. Getting off at his bus stop downtown, he saw that cafe on the 5th and remembered what that guy in the elevator said to him. Checking his watch, he had enough time to pop in there.

Sam’s senses were dull and heightened at the same time. He thought he heard his name being called in a hushed tone, but he rationalized it as the traffic from the street paired his hangover.

Finding his way into the shop, it smelled amazing and ignited his appetite. He couldn't remember the last time he ate. He ordered a large iced coffee and banana muffin. Noticing the wheatgrass, he added a shot of that too. 

Turning around, Sam saw the elevator guy. The thought of him in flannel flashed in his mind when the blond spoke up, "So, took me up on my offer then?"

"Huh? Oh yeah." He gestured to his full hands and walked to a tabletop to set them down as he got organized. The other guy was only an order behind him, so he joined him.

He raised his wheatgrass to him, "To our health." It was earthy and fresh, and just what he needed. They stared at each other. Before he could ask him his name, the blonde motioned, "Best be off before we're late."

Sam placed his bag and followed him out of the shop. "So, did you grow up around here?"

They stood waiting for the crosswalk to change. "No, I relocated from Pennsylvania. You?"

"I'm from Kansas." He sipped his coffee. "This is kinda weird, but I can't help thinking, I know you."

The shorter man grunted. Being near him felt right. He felt safer, less confused. "Do you have plans after work?"

"Uhh, just working out. How many miles can you run?" The elevator dinged.

He thought about last night, "I ran about eight yesterday."

"I will be at Canterbury Park at six if you want to join me. By the fountain."

"Cool. I might take you upon it." He stepped off his floor and busied himself with work. He didn't really want to exercise, but he wanted to spend time with... Shit, he never got his name.

Throughout the day, he felt a few waves of reassurance come through in lieu of the waves of panic that he had been experiencing. Those golden eyes from the other night calming him. Sam was still nauseous and didn't feel right, but he was improving.

Sam got out of work on time, caught the bus, changed into workout clothes, and got to the park by 6. Sam saw the elevator guy stretching by the fountain and joined him. "Hey! I'm Sam Wesson, by the way."

"Haa, I'm Dean Smith." He shook his hand.

They took their time warming up. They didn't have much to talk about, but they enjoyed the companionable silence and run. Dean was pleased Sam could keep up with him and commented when they finished their last mile. He even offered him a ride home, though Sam declined. He hopped on the bus and went home to cook dinner. The past couple of days had been so exhausting. He crashed early.

At first, Sam's dreams were more like a comforting nightmare than anything. He and Dean were tracking down a ghost that was killing people that lived inside and carried a lot of salt and broke into places too? He felt his dream slipping away, but he didn't want to leave until they got rid of the ghost. He fell into the next dreamscape, which was his in an old house having breakfast with his family, but it wasn't his family. The golden-eyed man was serving them breakfast. 'Oh, there you are,' he said to him.

He placed a plate of food in front of him and asked Sam, 'Where are you?'

Sam was confused, 'What do you mean?'

'Samuel Royce, feel me. Reach out to me.' The golden-haired man pleaded with him. He felt a surge of love and desperation from him.

'I love you.' Sam said without hesitation.

The shorter man’s eyes dilated, ‘I love you too.’ He paused, 'Tell me where you are.' Sam didn’t understand what he was asking, and the handsome one inquired, 'Fine. Tell me what you're doing tomorrow.'

His response was simple. 'Working. At the office.' Sam examined the other man. The sunlight was coming through the windows, making him look like the sunrise itself.

He encouraged Sam, 'Good. What office?'

'Umm, my job. Sandover Bridge Iron."

'I'm coming for you.' Reaching up, the golden-eyed man placed his hands on Sam’s cheeks and kissed him fiercely. He was wrapped in pure love, and everything melted away into darkness.

However, Sam was still in his REM stage and continued to dream. Back in the office, many people were standing around in shock in the employee break room. He saw the origin of their gaze, a body at an awkward angle, whose head was inside the microwave. 'Ugh,' was his initial reaction. He witnessed Ian telling someone that he was only a week away from retirement. 'Why commit suicide?' Sam stepped closer when he heard a beeping sound. 'Nooooo' he only got a few feet closer by the time he was swiftly pulled out of his dream and back into the real world without being able to see the man in the microwave.

**Day 4**

Waking up to the buzzing of his alarm pissed Sam off. He knew the dream was over, and there was no way to get back to it. Trying to make sense of it, it began slipping away with the exception of the golden-eyed man. _ 'I'm coming for you.' _ God, he wished that was true. It was a fantasy he could ever experience a connection like that.

This was the best he felt in days, and he even caught an earlier bus. Hearing sirens, his instincts screamed at him to get to the break room as fast as possible. Making it to the IT floor, his nightmare became a reality when he saw the man hanging out of the microwave. It was exactly like his dream, and Ian even said he was only a week from retirement. He moved to take a closer look when the police came in and pushed everyone out.

Catching Dean’s eye, he hollered Dean’s name. His arms were crossed, but he stood to attention when Sam called his name. The blond asked, "Did you know him?"

"No. You?"

"No, but that's an inconsiderate way to end your life," Dean scoffed.

"Who said it was suicide?" he asked.

His voice was low, "Are you insinuating something else?"

The taller man shrugged, "He was only a week away from retirement. It doesn't add up."

"Maybe he didn't have anything to live for."

Sam was disapproving of his tone, "Do you believe in ghosts?"

"What, are you off your meds?" He questioned him. "Of course not!"

Sam glanced around. The office was in a state of chaos. "I-I have a bad feeling like it's not what it appears to be."

"Keep it to yourself. I'll see you later." He squeezed his arm and walked away. Before finding his way to his cubicle, he stopped to see Ian. The police had just interviewed him. "I'm sorry, Ian. Did you have any idea about his state of mind?”

He was shaking, "No. He has been acting weird the last couple of days since HR called him up, though."

Sam was strangely composed as he questioned his co-worker, "What was he working on?"

He was frustrated from losing his friend. "I don't know. He was blubbering on about not saving his work yesterday. He was so upset. He should have been coasting!"

Sam put a hand on his arm, "Yeah. I get that. Why did HR call him up? Were they threatening his retirement?"

"No, no. I don't know what happened. I heard they are going to send the IT department home today, though."

Sam looked Ian in the eyes, "Ok, well, if I don't see you, take care, yeah?"

"Yeah, yeah, see ya," He replied and walked away.

Sam took a breath and headed down the corridor to his desk when he saw  _ him,  _ the man from his dreams. Sam was frozen in his place as a storm of rolling emotions barreled towards him. He could feel this other man with his whole being. Though the shorter man stopped inches from his face, his feelings did not. Power was oozing off him. The golden-eyed regarded him with such concern; Sam lifted his palm and pressed it to his dream man’s cheek and questioned, "Are you real?"

Sam flushed with anger and pulled back before realizing it wasn't  _ his _ anger. It was the other man’s. "I'm sorry," he stammered out.

The golden-eyed man stroked his hair, pulled him into a hug, and spoke into his neck, "I have been so worried." Sam embraced him, finally feeling ok. Had he been experiencing this other person’s emotion the whole time?

'Yea baby, it was me. I'm so sorry.' Sam heard in his head.

He jumped back, "What's going on? Who are you?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay in updating! There are two more chapters that follow this story arc, and I hope to have them up in the next few days! Thanks for reading and commenting <3


	34. Gabe POV

Gabe POV

Four days his husband had been missing.

The first day he woke in a panic, he knew immediately Sam wasn't in their home. He discerned through their bond; Sam was safe and stable, but he couldn't get a location on him. Reaching out, he was slapped by static. He became frantic. Their home was heavily warded. There was a very short list of beings capable of getting through, and he knew it was his brethren.

He hollered to Castiel, demanding he show himself at once. The subservient angel that he was appeared, "What is so important, Gabriel?"

He pulled at his hair, "Get a lock on, Dean."

Cas closed his eyes and opened them again. "That's odd. I cannot. Is he with Sam?"

"Sam's missing! What have you heard in Heaven?"

"I've said this before. They don't tell me anything. They believe I am too close to Dean."

He cried out, "You should be! The two vessels of archangels need guardians!"

Unphased, Cas responded, "Go see Michael and Raphael. Surely they will be aware of the situation."

He turned his back and pressed his hands on the windows, "If I go up there, I might not come home. Who knows what they will do to me.” He sneered, "I abandoned my family! You  _ know _ they will not be kind."

Castiel sighed, "You are going to have to face them at some point. Are you certain they won't be pleased to see you?"

"I'd bet my life on it. They’re power-hungry egotists.” He ordered, “Castiel, go to Heaven and question your garrison. Uriel had traitors within the mix."

"Gabriel, you are the one to tell me to think for myself, I don’t think this is wise.” Hesitating, he added, “I have not mentioned this before, but are you not bonded to Sam?"

He turned his green-golden eyes to Cas, reluctant to tell him the truth. "I am. A gift of our Father."

Castiel straightened his tie, "Why can you not locate him then?"

"I think he's been put in an alternate reality, probably with Dean. The angel that did this must be in the faction that wants the Apocalypse to begin. I can't think of any other reason. Sure, I did it for kicks, but I was trying to illustrate a point even then.”Gabriel frowned, “I can feel him, but I can't communicate. Have you told anyone of our bonding?"

"Of course not," he assured him.

"How clearly can you see it, our bond?"

"There is no mistaking it when you are together. It’s brilliant." He stared off into space as if remembering what being in their presence was like. "Individually, I cannot decipher your relationship. You are both an enigma."

"And Dean?"

Cas answered honestly as always, "He is perplexing on his own. I am drawn to him. Do you know something I am not aware of?"

"No, but I can see your mark on him. Even when he is alone." He placed a hand on Cas's shoulder, "Please, speak to the other angels. They won't find it suspicious if you are looking for your charge."

"Very well. Though our numbers have diminished, it might take some time. I will keep you apprised." With a flutter of wings, Cas was gone.

Gabriel needed to see Bobby. When he popped himself in his kitchen, he saw him and a blonde woman at the table.

Bobby's eyes were huge, and then his face contorted into one of anger. "Who the fuck are you?" He exclaimed.

Gabe sputtered, "Sam's gone. Have you seen him?”

He was so focused on Bobby that he didn't see Ellen leave the table and return until he was facing the shotgun’s barrel. She said, "We don't know no Sam, and you better get the hell out of our house before I blow your head off."

He disappeared in a flash. Whatever shift took place altered the lives of everyone Sam and Dean had had contact with. If he were only the Trickster, the chances of finding Sam were slim to none. But he was more than that. He was an Archangel. An Archangel that created many alternate realities in his time, who better sees the ripples of them in time than he? He remembered almost all of his handiwork, so he began popping into realities that he did not recognize.

Within each world, he quickly determined if it was the right one, but he knew he needed to be thorough as not to backtrack later. By the end of the day, he had visited 6 different realities, all of them without Sam and Dean. Each one calling out her name in jest.

There was still no word from Castiel yet, so he plundered on through three more before he had an idea. Maybe he could connect to her in her dreams?

Gabriel went back to their home and sat on their bed. Hit with a deep-seated longing, he picked up her pillow and inhaled her scent. He searched their bond. Though mostly static, he was greatly relieved to have some connection to his husband. Unable to break through, he meditated his devotion and commitment to him on the narrow tendril of their bond and prayed he knew he was coming for him before he was pushed out into the static.

As the morning light came through the windows of their home on the second day, he called to Castiel.

He was less patient than before, "What have you learned?"

Castiel practically rolled his eyes, "Nothing that will help our search. I believe there are Apocalypse angels in our midst, but none that had any information." He paused, "I have a few angels that I still need to speak to that were not in Heaven."

Gabe questioned, "Is that out of the ordinary?"

"No, my superiors only come to deliver orders. Otherwise, we stick to our given tasks."

This made sense to Gabe, "Okay, who do you still need to speak to?"

"I have had the most contact with Hannah and Zachariah."

Gabe scowled, "Zachariah. That sniveling dipshit. He has climbed the ranks? I don't know Hannah."

"Well, your assessment of Zachariah still holds true. He answers only to your brothers. Hannah, on the other hand, is a strong leader. I do not think she would be so manipulative."

Sorrow pained Gabriel. He promised that he would protect his Sammy boy from manipulation, and he failed. He couldn't even find him with a bond such as theirs! "Make it your mission to find Hannah today. If it wasn't her, that leaves shitty Zach."

Cas was confused, "You aren't going to confront him?"

Gabe shook his head and rubbed his brow, "I can't guarantee I won't kill him. Due to the scale, only the one that is responsible can reverse it properly. I visited Bobby yesterday and had a gun jammed in my face."

"Doesn't that run the risk that he will be withholding?"

Gabe was quick to respond, "Would you be withholding at the hands of my wrath?"

Cas's blue eyes were large as he fathomed it, "No. What will you do today?"

Gabriel clicked his jaw, "There are countless realities. I am going to use Pagan magic to hone in on them. With the likelihood of it being Zachariah, I can specifically target his realities. I can feel Sam. He is stable as she was before. Less irritable than yesterday, actually."

"I still don't understand why you do not storm the gates of Heaven," Cas added.

"Because as long as I can't sense he isn't direct harm, the risk of my brothers imprisoning me is too high! Especially with the impending Apocalypse. Sussing out even more traitors will be a tremendous advantage. You have a list, right?"

Cas nodded and walked over to touch Gabriel's temple to share the angels he identified as treacherous. Gabriel's jaw dropped, "That's absurd! That's a quarter of your garrison!"

Cas solemnly agreed, "I know. I will seek out Hannah. Be diligent, brother. We will find our compatriots."

Gabriel's mind was in anarchy. With many fragmented thoughts, he needed a pen and paper to write down his ingredients for the Pagan ritual:

_ Moon Stone (from this cycle) _

_ Eagle heart, brain, and blood _

_ Oil of Abramelin _

_ Gold Ore _

_ Hemlock _

_ Mace _

_ Blood of an Elder _

_ Blood of a Junior _

_ 333 lit candles of white wax _

After penning his list, he resolved to acquire these in short order. Going to the Moon proved more exhausting than he remembered... Hence, capturing the eagle was more difficult, but the other ingredients were simple. After half a day of scavenging, everything he needed was arranged on his kitchen island. He used his own blood to write the Enochian symbols, but he still needed a Junior’s blood.

He had called to Castiel, but there was no response. He called and called again until Castiel screamed into his mind, "Not now!"

There was no additional message, no distress signal. Gabriel knew Castiel must have had his reasons. 'Shit.' He reigned in his emotions and went out to the patio with Vincent to meditate into the static again. It took effort on his part to remain calm, but he focused on his love for Sam. If Zachariah were responsible, the spell would lead him to Sam. It was reassuring to know they would be reunited soon, and that's what sustained him.

Cas appeared in his kitchen to find him outside after sunset. "Gabriel, I apologize for not coming earlier. Hannah had been locked in a prison-"

His voice startled Gabriel out of his ruminations, "Geez, Cas! Now, I know what Dean is always on about…"

He huffed out, "Why does my appearance alarm people?"

Gabe knew Cas wasn't hip to humans. He tried to be sensitive, "We are happy to see you, but you need to learn to announce yourself. Make some noise first."

"Okay." He knocked on the window. He repeated himself, "Hannah had been locked in a prison."

Thankful for the semblance of peace he found during the day, he gracefully stood before Castiel, "But she is alive and free now?"

"Yes, but our escape did not go unnoticed. We had to 'shake' them." Castiel explained using air quotes. "It was Zachariah who confined her."

"Thank you, Cas. That is good news, to say the least, the spell is in order but requires your blood to be complete. As my blood is from an Elder, I need your blood as a Junior."

Gabe led them through the kitchen and lit the candles with a flick of his wrist. He picked up the blade, and Cas obediently held his hand out before him. Cas didn’t flinch as Gabe cut his wrist. He then cleaned the knife and cut his own wrist, saturating the mixture with more blood.

The cauldron began to bellow red and gold smoke when Gabriel hung the pendulum above the boiling mixture. It swung from side to side for 15 turns, then he dropped it in. When the smoke changed to white, he said to Castiel, "Do not hesitate when I call upon you."

He picked up the concoction and drank it in deep gulps. It burned his throat, and he was salivating from the iron. The blood and other organics dribbled down his chin. The pain was excruciating, but it was of no consequence.

The potion worked. He was in tune with Zachariah's universes. Sam wasn't at the first reality, so he moved on. Again nothing. He visited four different realities before deciding to return home to contact him in his dreamscape once again.

It was much easier to slip into Sam’s sleeping state with the spell in his system. Sam had been hunting a ghost with his brother, he mused, 'You can't keep a Winchester from doing what comes naturally to them, even in their sleep.' He shifted Sam’s dream to a recent memory of serving them breakfast. Not only was that a staple of the day, but family was so important to him. Not only did he recognize him, but he also told him where to look within the realities, Sandover Bridge Iron Company specifically .

This sent him over the moon, and he kissed him with his whole being. Everything he was, is, and would be. Sam was his life.


	35. Returning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the delay in updating. It's hard to get motivated when you don't do anything ;/

With a tenuous lock on Sam, it only took three more realities before he found him. No longer was his beacon muffled. Their bond was fully intact. He bounded toward him. Despite his haste, he tossed a lifeline to Castiel for him to follow him the considerable distance. 

He found him in a hallway in an old office building. Immediately, he sensed Sam’s conflicting emotions. Fear, desire, disbelief… He stopped in front of him.

The taller man pressed his palm to his cheek, "Are you real?"

It registered to him that Sam had no memory of him. His chest bloomed with fire, and it took all of his restraint to keep his golden wings sheathed. Unable to control his wrath from flowing through their bond, he locked his shields in the place before his despair bled through.

Sam pulled his hand back like a wounded animal, "I'm sorry."

His strong, beautiful husband was apologizing for something he knew nothing about to a man he didn’t know, and he wanted to set the world on fire. He stroked his hair, pulled him into a hug, and sniffled into the crook of his neck, "I have been so worried." He held onto his hunter like a drowning man would a buoy. He heard Sam so clearly in his head when he thought it must be his emotions that had displaced him so much.

'Yea baby, it was me. I'm so sorry.' He instinctively spoke in his mind.

Gabriel felt a spike of panic as Sam dislodged himself from his embrace, "What's going on? Who are you?"

Fighting his instincts to smith something, he drew in a deep breath and elaborated, "My name is Gabriel. Is this somewhere we can talk?"

Sam touched the base of his neck and led him to his desk. The IT department had been sent home, and Sam had been the last one on the floor. Gabriel pulled someone’s chair around and sat so he could face him. It was taking all of his strength to keep his shields in place and his hands to himself until Sam had his memories back.

Pulling a lollipop from the inside of his green jacket, he offered it to Sam. This always helped to disarm humans. He shook his head, so Gabe popped it into his mouth. "Old habit of mine. I kicked candy a while ago, but I really need it today."

Sam’s light laughter made his grace squee, and he relaxed a little bit. He looked around at the empty office, "Before we get into any details, do you mind telling me what happened here?"

He was trembling a little, "Well, Paul stuck his head in the microwave and rigged it to melt his brain."

He saw the hesitation, "But?"

Sam frowned, "He was only a week away from retirement. We’re missing something, but they think it's a suicide."

"Your instincts are good. We will figure out why he died later, but we have bigger things to tend to first. Do you recognize me?"

He bit his lip, "From my dreams, yes."

'That's it?' Gabriel thought but needed to gauge the situation. "When did those start?"

Sam counted on his fingers, "The last two nights. My first day on the job. Are they related?"

He was proud of his husband all the time, but even more so without his memories, "Yes. Tell me about yourself, as if it were a bio for something."

He gave him a goofy look, "My name is Sam Wesson. I am from Kansas, and I'm 25 years old. I like dogs.” He crossed his arms over his chest, “Now, you tell me why you were in my dreams. Are you a ghost?"

Gabe pulled out his sucker, "Nope. I’m an angel."

"Bullshit," Sam cried.

He couldn't resist laughing, "Man, you Winchester's always call bull on that. I wonder what Dean is going to say."

Quick to respond, "Don't laugh at me. Wait, how do you know Dean?"

This wasn't going to be easy, so he fired the answers he was planning on asking, "Dean is your brother, Sam. I am your husband, and this reality that we are currently in is false. It has been poorly crafted if I might add.” He ran a hand through his golden locks, “I can't give you your memories back, but I'm telling you the truth." Sam looked small despite being crammed in an office chair, "You can feel me, right?"

He nodded. "We are one. United. I'm holding back as much as I can now, but…" He reached out and held his hand. "But soon, all my shields are going to drop, and my fury is going to be unleashed." He let his love flow to his human, "I don't want you to be scared or upset. Please understand that your and Dean's safety is my number one concern. We don't have much time, and there are dynamics in place that I couldn't possibly explain to you now. When the time comes, follow my lead and remember that we can communicate telepathically." He tapped his head and then his nose. "Can you trust me?"

"Yea."

He squeezed his hand, "Good. Let's check on my little bro and see how he's doing with your big bro." He took Sam’s other hand, and they popped into Dean's office.

Dean was holding a putter like a sword when they appeared. "Sweet baby Jesus! You too?"

"Put the club down. They are here to help." Sam was walking sideways to him, "I don't quite know what's going on exactly, but they aren't gonna' hurt us." The taller hunter pushed the putter down, but Dean kept it in his hands.

Castiel spoke, "I don't understand what I did wrong. It appears his memory has been altered. He is violent, as well."

Dean swung the club, "I am not violent! I wouldn't hurt a fly!"

Castiel straightened his coat and spoke confidently to Gabriel, "I even announced myself."

"You’re swinging a golf club around Dean-O! Cassie here is a very straight forward angel."

"Angel, what a load of bull!" He accidentally hit his desk with his putter, and papers scattered on the floor.

Gabe gave Sam a pointed look before talking to Dean again, "You were threatening him, were you not?"

He became wild, "He just appeared! Who the hell are you guys?"

Gabriel was annoyed, pointed to Dean's chair, and told him to sit. When he didn't, Gabe flashed the shadow of his wings. "Now."

In an instant, Dean's back end was in his seat. "Long story short; The Apocalypse is on the verge of beginning. You and your brother Sam are of the few capable of stopping it, and another angel has altered your memories for an unknown reason. Castiel and I are here to rescue you.”

This was also the first Sam had heard of their mission, both his and Dean were speechless. Gabriel pushed reassurance to him, "Don't worry about it too much guys, you'll have your memories back, and it will just be another day at the office for you. No pun intended."

Dean stood up, "What if that isn't the life I want!"

"Too bad." Gabe popped another sucker in his mouth. The room around them shook slightly. He motioned for Sam and Dean to get closer to each other. "Strap in, both of you. It’s going to get hellacious in here."

With a flash of light, Zachariah was in the office with them, dressed in a grey suit and patent leather shoes. "Hey, guys! You having fun?" He surveyed the room and nodded, "Dean, Sam." He then turned to Gabriel, dismissing Cas. "Gabriel. I see the rumors were true. You are alive! Isn't that hunky-dory." He took a few steps in his direction and leaned to inspect the smaller man. "Did you clip your wings? For that one?" He pointed to Sam and clapped his hands together, "How much great is this! For me, anyway."

Gabe was ready to erupt, but he wanted Zachariah to feel he had the upper hand, for now. He clenched his jaw tight. "What do you want with the Winchesters?"

"Golly, what don't I want." He paraded around smugly. "First and foremost, I want Dean and Sam to say yes to Michael and Lucifer."

Castiel spoke, "Why? Why would you want the Apocalypse to begin?”

Zachariah spun on his heels, "Oh, so you do have a voice!"

"Well, I might as well tell you since you two aren't leaving this room… Once Lucifer is free, Michael can kill him, and we can have paradise on earth. The way we see fit."

The chamber inside Gabriel was about to collapse, "You're telling me that you and other angels are going to destroy what Father created? That makes you no better than Lucifer!"

Zachariah shrugged, "God doesn't care."

Gabriel walked up to Zachariah, "That seems to be Heaven's new motto." His eyes narrowed, and he spoke to Sam in his mind, 'Get under the desk.'

As soon as Sam pulled Dean under the desk, Gabriel released his real power. Instantly, the room filled with gold, blinding light. The glass-paneled windows shattered. Gabriel spread his wings wide, and Zachariah sank to his knees.

He bellowed, "Reverse what you did!" 

There was an odor in the room, smelling as closely as what could be described as the atmosphere, and Gabriel felt the shift himself. Sam and Dean crawled out from beneath the desk and oriented themselves. Gabriel could feel Sam teeming with his own anger once his memories returned.

"Get up!” Zachariah struggled to stand when Gabriel yanked him to his feet. "Apologize."

He began stammering, "Wha-Why? I was just, just following orders."

Trying to weasel out of the situation made Gabriel that much more upset. Gabriel bobbed his head, "Okay, well, clearly you are incapable of understanding the impact of your actions." He looked towards his husband, "Sam, exorcise him."

Zachariah looked like he was trying to escape. His crystal blue eyes were wide, "That's not possible!"

"Sure, it is." Mentally, he reached out to Sam, 'Pretend like you can't, though.'

"I can't!" He honestly responded.

Sam heard his brother's voice, "You can, Sammy."

Gabriel began chanting in his mind. He repeated it out loud. It wasn’t that different than exorcizing a demon, "Omni potentis Dei potestatem invoco…"

He grabbed Zachariah by his collar roughly, "You remember that any human can exorcise an angel. And tell my brothers that  _ our lives _ ,  _ our bond _ will not be shaken. Least of all by you!"

As Sam continued the exorcism, "Abrogo terra, hoc angelorum in obse quentum, Domine expuere, Domine expuere…" The rest of the room watched as Zachariah's grace was squeezed out and ascended back into heaven.

Castiel was the first to speak, "That was impressive. I was unaware that humans were capable of that."

Gabe checked on Sam, "They can't. Sam is the exception. I just wanted him to have a little fear of their species." Sam wrapped his arms around his husband and squeezed him tightly.

"Spiffy." Dean chimed in. "What are you going to do with that poor bastard?" As he pointed to the crumpled vessel on the floor.

"Cas and I will take care of him.” Gabriel released Sam from his embrace, much to both their dismay, but their bond was 100% intact, and he could feel him as much as he could feel himself. “Do you guys want to take care of the ghost?"

"Yeah. That's easy." Dean opened up his laptop and pulled up information on the building. "Looks like we're looking for Sandover’s remains or hair. He was cremated." He got up to walk on the door when he called over his shoulder, "Sam, you comin'?"


	36. Discerning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year! 2020 is finally over. Looking forward to 2022 when we can put this all behind us. However, our Team Free Will still has to avert the Apocalypse. Wouldn't it be nice to have an angel on your shoulder helping you get through 2021 now? 
> 
> Enjoy!

Sam and Dean were working on a case when they stumbled upon the Supernatural Series. Flummoxed, they purchased all of the books in the store. Sitting in the Impala with their windows down, they read as much as they could. Sam pulled out his phone and dialed Gabe. "There are books written about us. Whole books!"

"Put him on speaker," Dean said.

He switched it over, and Gabe's voice was slightly garbled. He informed them, "Looks like you found your prophet."

"What does that even mean? How does he know so much about us?" Sam cringed as his brother leaned across him to shout into the phone.

"When God chooses you for a mission, someone usually writes about it. Just… Just ignore it and go about your business. I'm close to finding a lead that may tell us how many seals are left.” There was a brief pause, and Sam felt Gabe’s hesitation through the bong. “I am going to be incommunicado. That might even mean our connection to Samanshine." When Sam didn't verbally respond, he received a steady stream of reassurance. "Call Cas if you want more info," and the line went dead. In his head, he heard Gabriel say, 'Love you.' It made his heart melt how domestic they were becoming.

Dean looked over at his and was perplexed, "Why are you smiling?"

Sam cocked his head, "Gabe told me he loved me."

Dean smirked and punched him in the arm, "You are so lame. So what's our game plan?"

Sam tossed the book into Dean's lap, "We find the author." 

It took some finagling to get Chuck Shurley’s address, but soon enough, they stood on the stoop of his run-down house.

Dean pushed the doorbell when the small man in his boxers and robe answered the door. "You Chuck Shurley? The Chuck Shurley who wrote the Supernatural books?"

He was clearly hesitant to answer any questions, "Maybe. Why?"

Dean introduced himself, "I'm Dean. This is Sam. The Dean and Sam you've been writing about."

"Yeah. Look, uh, I appreciate your enthusiasm. Really, I do. It's always nice to hear from the fans. But for your own good, I strongly suggest you get a life."

He tried to shut the door on them, but Dean stopped him. "See, here’s the thing. We have a life. You've been using it to write your books."

Chuck protested, "Wait a minute. Now, this isn't funny."

They barged in, "Damn straight, it's not funny!"

Chuck was freaking out, "Is this some kind of Misery thing? It is, isn't it? It's a Misery thing!"

"It's not a Misery thing," each step getting closer to Chuck, "We are not fans. I'm Dean Winchester, and this is my brother Sam Winchester."

Chuck stammered out, "Last names were never in the books. I never told anybody about that. I never even wrote that down." Sam slowed Dean down so he could see how frightened Chuck was. He let him put some distance between them but followed him into the kitchen. Sam noted how dirty dishes covered the counters and garbage overflowed from the bin.

He was startled to see them, "Oh! Oh, you're still there… You're not a hallucination."

Sam half-smiled at him, "Nope."

"Well, there's only one explanation. Obviously, I'm a god."

Dean rubbed his forehead. You’re not a god, Chuck, you're a prophet."

"You two are crazy. If I'm a prophet, prove it." Chuck huffed out.

Sam's voice was calm, "I'm sure there will be a time. How about you just tell us what you're working on."

The realization hit Chuck, and his voice was an octave higher than expected, "Holy crap! I wrote myself at my house confronted by my characters." After partially deciding this was his current reality, that he wasn't still drunk from yesterday, he went over to his computer and handed some disorganized papers to Sam. "Uh, It's Lilith, and she's coming for Sam."

Dean yanked the pages out of Sam's hands and began to read out loud, ""Lilith patted the bed seductively. Unable to deny his desire, Sam succumbed, and they sank into the throes of fiery demonic passion."

Sam laughed, and Dean snapped at him, "You think this is funny?"

"What you don't? I mean, come on. Fiery demonic passion? I'm married, Dean. I'm not going to bed anyone, especially not a demon." He put his hands on his hips, directing his attention back to Chuck, "So, what happens after the fiery demonic whatever?" He reached out to Gabriel, but it was still silent. It was disconcerting, but he mentioned this as a possibility.

Chuck was fearful of answering, "I don't know. It hasn't come to me yet."

Sam's voice was soft again, coaxing him into giving them more answers. Good cop/Bad cop was a trope for a reason. "You know Chuck, I have premonitions. Is that what you experience?"

He sighed, "Well, it usually starts with a headache. A terrible headache. Aspirin is useless, so I drink until I fall asleep." He crossed his arms. "At first, I thought it was just a crazy dream, but then it never stopped. It just keeps happening. I can't stop it."

Sam sympathized with Chuck, but they still needed answers. Chuck didn't want any pity from his. "I think I need a drink. Do you guys want one?" He scurried away from the hunter.

"Dean, just read what get's us to that point."

He skimmed through the pages, "You can't be serious. 'The minivan accident wasn't that bad, but Dean still saw stars. He scratched absently at the pink flower Band-Aids on his face.'

Sam gave him a smile, "So? I've seen you gushing blood. You'd use duct tape and bar rags before you'd put on a pink flower Band-Aid." Sam pointed out, "This all of this is totally implausible."

"But we've read some of the books, Sammy! You know how scary accurate he is!" Dean countered. He tilted his head towards the ceiling, "Cas! Get your ass down, here. We need you."

Chuck had set the drinks down and looked around with anticipation. When Castiel appeared in front of Dean, the prophet stumbled into the coffee table and fell backward on the dingy couch. The angel’s voice was monotone, "What do you require?"

Dean pointed to Chuck flopping around on the couch in his boxers and robe. "Meet our prophet, Chuck."

Castiel looked down upon him and assessed him, "Hello. It's an honor to meet you, Chuck Shurley." Before Chuck could even get in a respectable position, Cas turned back to Dean, "Why do you seem distressed?"

"You know his name? How do you know his name?" Dean questioned.

"I know all of the prophet's names. They burned into my being."

Dean rolled his eyes in acquiescence, "Okay, well, tell me one thing. Is everything he writes true?"

"What the prophet has written can't be unwritten. As he has seen it, so it shall come to pass." Cas paused, "What has he written?"

"A love connection between Sam and Lilith."

"But that's not possible," Sam interjected.

Cas slowly nodded and took in the information, "Hmmm. And then what?"

The older hunter’s cheeks were flushed with anger, "Nothing. Chuck shorted out!"

Chuck stood quickly, "Hey! I didn't short out. I just… I haven't gotten the rest yet."

Dean pulled Castiel to the side by his jacket, "I feel stupid doing this, but I am fresh out of options, and Gabriel is unavailable for now. So please, I need some help. I'm praying, okay? Come on."

He stared deeply into Dean's eyes, "Prayer is a sign of faith. This is a good thing, Dean."

"So you'll help me?"

"I am not sure what I can do. It's a prophecy. I can't interfere."

Dean's temper rose once again, but his eyes did not falter from the angel's intense gaze, "You have tested me and thrown me every which way. And I have never asked for anything. Not a damn thing! But now I'm asking, please."

"What you're asking it's not within my power to do. Dean. You must understand why I can't intercede. Prophets are special. They're protected." Castiel's eyes were pleading with Dean to understand his meaning, "If anything threatens a prophet, anything at all, an Archangel will appear to destroy that threat. Archangels are absolute. They're Heaven's most terrifying weapon."

Though Cas wasn't great at reading microexpressions, he knew Dean would follow. "And they're tied to prophets?"

"Yes."

His voice was hopeful, "So if a prophet was in the same room with like ...a demon?"

"Then the most fearsome wrath of Heaven would rain down on that demon." He placed a hand on Dean's shoulder, "Just so you understand why I can't help." With that, Castiel took his leave. Dean was slightly disappointed that Cas left so abruptly. At least, there was a backup plan. Their day would continue, but with Chuck in tow.

It was after dark, and there had still been no sign of Lilith or Gabriel. Dean refused to leave Sam's side or let Chuck go home. Instead, he made a hex bag to hide their presence and sealed himself and Chuck in the bathroom.

It wasn't the most practical plan, but it would at least re-write the prophet's work. Dean was regretting it after 20 minutes. Chuck's anxiety was getting the better of him. He finally gave up and gave him a bottle of whiskey so he would shut his trap. He didn't want to be responsible for punching a prophet of the Lord.

It appeared that whiskey or no whiskey, Chuck was high maintenance. Dean's patience was reaching his limit. Chuck was blubbering in the corner about how he was a failure, that whatever success he had wasn't even his own. At that point, Dean's attention returned to the situation. He clapped a hand over Chuck's mouth and whispered, "Shut up," in his ear.

The hunter and the prophet were aware that Lilith had made his appearance. Dean peered through the door to see them dancing around one another, verbally and physically.

He wasn't surprised to see Lilith in another meat suit, but he had to admit, she was kind of hot. 

The demon spoke to Sam, "All you have to do is agree to my terms."

Sam took two steps to the left and squinted at his adversary, "Why would you back down? Why now?"

"Turns out, I don't survive this war. Killed off right before the good part starts." Lilith was trying to appeal to Sam’s humanity, but it was a far cry from working. He couldn't even feel a human soul in the woman in front of him. There were no human traits left. What he could pick up on was the massive demonic entity within that poor girl's body. It was like looking into a void, and it sent a shiver down his spine. He knew he wasn’t powerful enough to kill Lilith without assistance. Thank God for having Chuck in their back pocket, though.

"Ok, what do you want?"

"For it to go back to the way it was. Before, I had angels to deal with 24/7. The good old days... When it was all baby blood all the time."

While Lilith kept up the innocent act, Sam let it go as a stall for them, "And what do you want in return?"

She batted her eyelashes, "Your head on a stick - Dean's too. Call it a consolation prize."

A pop echoed through the room, and Gabriel appeared, "Yeah, like going to happen."

Watching from the crack in the doorway, Dean let out a breath he didn’t even realize he was holding. Lilith's eyes flashed white, and Gabriel stopped, frozen by his powers. "Not so quick, Uncle Gabriel," she said cooly.

Whether it was for show, or her abilities had actually stunned him, he was free in a heartbeat’s time. With a wink and a flick of his wrist, he smoked her out of the young hygienist. 

As her essence was suspended in the air, the outline of Gabriel’s wings cast shadows on the walls. He disintegrated the smoke, and with a crackle, the smoke evaporated. Sam had been following the encounter closely and emotionally through their bond. He knew Lillith was finally dead. 

Chuck and Dean emerged out of the bathroom to witness the final moments of Lilith's existence. Before any of them could take a breath, there was a loud roar of thunder that bellowed into laughter.

Fear nipped at the younger hunter, and he ran to Gabriel's side. The Archangel grasping his hand tightly as he addressed the new presence, "Raphel."

_ "Brother, you still recognize me," _ the disembodied voice replied.

Gabriel called out to his brother, "Show yourself."

_ "In time. I needed to congratulate you on breaking the final seal." _

He was genuinely mystified. The information he had sussed out during the day was not even close to this revelation. "Excuse me?"

The dancing timbre of Raphael's voice revealed his glee,  _ "Gabriel, never the pawn, until now. You and your human are bound most profoundly. Your grace, his soul, they are one. It was as if Sam killed Lilith himself." _

Dread pooled within them all.

_ “You and your band of merry humans and the disgrace Castiel could not have stopped this. The seals were broken a week ago. You have been played, brother. This was just more entertaining with you being the one to unleash Lucifer.”  _

Sam was truly afraid now. His mate’s anger boiling through their bond, the realization the Devil would walk the earth, seek him out… The uncertainty of everything since Plan A had been royally lampooned. 

Team Free Will was fucked. 


	37. Dreaming

The Singer house atmosphere was tense and silent as everyone disbanded to drink their defeat away in their own quarters. Sam wasn’t above reaching for the whiskey, but he needed to make a spare bed for Chuck and inform him this wasn’t a request. 

Gabe was pushing Sam away under the guise he was reinforcing their wards, but he could feel the Archangel wallowing in self-pity. Sam understood he needed time to process as well, and he would give it to him, but he would not allow him to push him away.

Sam was putting on his pajamas when he heard the squeak of the door. Gabriel flopped onto the edge of the bed. His naturally mischievous eyes were duller than he had ever seen. Putting his hand on his slumped shoulder, he spoke quietly, "It wasn't your fault." Gabriel scrutinized him at his comment. Sam continued, "The world is a better place without Lilith." Sam tilted his chin and reinforced it through their bond, "Substantially better."

Tears were welling in his eyes, "What's that say about Lucifer?" He cleared his throat and put his hand on Sam’s thigh. "She was his creation.”

With a sigh, “Free will wasn’t limited to just humans, ya’ know. You and Castiel are proof of that. That applies to demons as well. ”

Gabriel murmured, “A part of me is consoled Lucifer has been released."

The turmoil brewing in Gabriel was intense. While Sam struggled to find the words, he pushed understanding for both his sentiments. It wasn't the same when Dean was rescued from hell, but Lucifer is his brother. Bonds such as those could never truly sever.

Sam wrapped his arms around Gabriel and pulled him into the bed with his, spooning the smaller person. He kissed his temple. After tonight, Sam knew Raphael couldn't be swayed. That Michael will do everything in his power to kill Lucifer. At least at this moment, their resolve to never be their vessels eased some of the anxiety.

Gabriel rolled on his side to rest his head on Sam’s chest. Sam ran his fingers through Gabe’s golden locks. "I hope you don't think I'm naive given we are talking about the Devil here, but do you… Do you think there is any hope of redemption?"

He uncurled himself from his husband and cupped his face in his hands. Gabriel gave him a gentle smile that finally reached his eyes, "You’re not naive. You’re too kind. I don't know how I got so lucky to have a mate that doesn't instinctively want to slay the Devil."

Sam emphasized, "There is a solution. I just know it." 

Gabriel leaned to kissed his jawline before putting his head back on his chest, wrapping his arm around his waist. He inhaled his hunter’s scent deeply, "One of the ideas I had was to strip Lucifer of his grace completely. However, even if he has no angelic power, he holds enough knowledge to damn the world."

"Do you think he still wants to?"

"Dunno’," he mumbled. "He hasn't been topside in thousands of years. There is no way to know what being imprisoned has done to him."

They both fell silent. Sam inquired, "What about God?"

Gabriel nuzzled into him, "He hasn't abandoned us completely, but it's going to be us vs. them. And when I say 'Us against Them,’ it isn't a rugby match. I mean the five of us against two powerful Archangels, the rest of Heaven, Hell, and its dominion."

He began toying with the edge of Sam’s shirt, "When Father bound us as one, he told me to save him. So you're right, there is a solution. We just haven't found it yet. We’re running out of time, though."

"Can we throw them all in the cage?"

"Interesting notion, but the cage wouldn't hold like its original design. Let alone overpowering all three of them, it would be like pissing on a beehive."

The young hunter was spitballing, "Could we separate them? Put one of them in an alternate reality while subduing another?"

"Lucifer won't be at his full strength without you, but we can't underestimate him either... I think we are on the right track." Gabriel sat up in bed and rested against the headboard. "Our best bet would be to disorient Michael while distracting Lucifer and Raphael. But we will need more than us, your brother, an old hunter, and a seraph, though. For any of our backup plans to work, really."

Sam sensed his hesitation of not wanting his brother to be put back in the cage but let it slide. "We can have a meeting tomorrow then."

Gabriel sighed, "Sure. And things are going to get messier now. Tonight, I fully expect Lucifer to try to seduce you as well." Sam's heart skipped a beat, but Gabriel only pulled him towards him. "We’ll be okay for now. It's time we have a little chat with him anyway." He pressed a quick kiss to the top of his crown, "Time to for sleep, bed bug."

"Eww." Sam tried to pull away, but Gabriel just laughed.

"What? You're what all the creepy crawlies are afraid of."

He sneered at him but took it as a compliment. Gabriel used his grace to put him into a restful slumber. Sam had barely slipped into REM before Lucifer appeared in his dream in Sam’s form in a remote field. 

Since this was Sam's mind and dreamscape, Gabriel let Sam keep the reigns and stood behind his. "You," Sam accused Lucifer.

"Haaa. Nice to meet you, Sam. I see you made an honest angel of my little brother." Lucifer’s demeanor was too casual for his liking. It was disconcerting seeing himself with someone puppeteering his body. "I didn't think my true vessel would look like a lumberjack, though. How is anyone supposed to take me seriously while wearing flannel?”

The Devil’s words were intended to throw him off, and they did, mainly for the cheapness of attacking his physical appearance. Sam wasn't going to be belittled by the Devil. He sent a pulse of energy so strong he flew back and landed on his ass. He rapidly blinked his daze away, "I see you are super juiced by Gabriel."

"No. I’m a Winchester.” Sam closed the distance between them. Holding his hand out, Lucifer stared dumbly at him once again. He realized he was offering to help him up. Gabriel was close at his heels, but he felt a surge of admiration at his actions. Lucifer shook his head and accepted the Winchesters’ help to his feet. 

Lucifer spoke softly, "My apologies." Sam couldn't tell if they were honest words or not, though. The Archangel before his cocked his head, and he had never thought his own appearance could look so alien, but he couldn’t dispute it while looking at his own reflection. Lucifer spoke with a touch of awe in his voice, "You're never going to say yes to me, are you?"

Sam merely shook his head no. "We would like to know what you want." He crossed his arms over his chest, "No bullshit."

Lucifer looked left and right while considering his words, "Apart from your body? I want to experience the world our Father created first hand. I want to make it a better world. It's in shambles."

Sam huffed out an annoyed breath. If Lucifer was going to put on an act, he could reciprocate. "That's vague."

Gabriel decided the peanut gallery was closed, "Brother, you know as well as I know there are only a few possibilities now that you’ve risen. Sam and I are here to tell you that we don't want to see you dead."

The Morningstar let out a harsh laugh, "Oh, I'm honored. A human and a coward have decided to spare me. How trite."

Sam closed the few steps between them and punched him square in the jaw. Gabriel was about to spring into action and pull his mate back, but Sam was too quick. He shoved Lucifer hard, and he fell on his ass again.

"The world has changed a HELL OF A LOT! NO THANKS to YOU! We, humans, have our problems, but Heaven and Hell do too. Shit, so does God! We are of the few people that do care about what happens to you. Show us some respect!"

Lucifer laid on the grass, rubbing his jaw. It was clear he couldn't make heads or tails of the situation. Gabriel walked a little closer to his brother and rubbed the back of his neck before speaking, "Hey, look, we're going to take off. Gotta' get my lumberjack of a beau back to REM again. Don't get into too much trouble, okay? We really do have good intentions." For the second time that evening, Lucifer found himself being hauled back to his feet.


End file.
